OUT AND ABOUT.

Wairarapa Daily Times, Volume XV, Issue 4343, 13 February 1893, Page 3

OUT AND ABOUT.

[By W.F.H.I

You were good enough to remark a few days ago that I had gone to the West Coast, and that Government officials would rejoice. That was your little bit of sarcasm, If a dog rejoices when you give hint au egg with red pepper in it, then Mr Gray, Sec- „ retary of the Post Office, will rejoice flVljtaa little Ramo I have in hand ' its maturity, asks where I have been, and what 1 have done. Well, I have achieved little. Still, a few notes may amuse aomo of your readers. \Ve started from Onga Onga, a small township mar Waipawa, on January 25. Dog-cart, one horse, and two portmanteaux each; I was dressed in calico pants, calico jacket., and melted visibly as far as Dancvirko; tbirty miles in lour hours. Here we saw the races. What a motley crew, From under what stonos do all tlteso reptiles creep ? You never see si ch villianous faces in tho Btreelß, Id about two hours wo went on, and tiie weather changed from tropical heat to wintry region. 1 put on an overcoat, and arrived at Woodville wet to the skin, shivering, and fingers numb ; at tho Club Hotel we lay in a hot hath to thaw, got hoVrum with lemon in it, and clothes, Uext day nifftwßßmion, whom I will call the E&iPstayed in Woodtille, and I went on to Palmeratcn North by train, Tho town has grown wonderfully, and tho number J, of hotels is astonishing, A Hebrew auctioneer has a Bplcndid furniture emporium, worthy of a bigger town, mßv - and the well-known maker of tents, HKr Dabl, seems to be doing ft wholesale business, What a change from Hawko's Bay! Bound Onga Onga everyone who is anyone bas 10,000 to 60,000 sheep, You ride for miles and miles over unformed roads without seeing a house, Thon in Norsewood you reach a region of tiny farmers, each pottering on with bis 60 sheep and three or four cows. What thoy produce and consume is religion, There are three rival" Pcandy" churches in full blast; three different bells offered you ifyou | do not forthwith join the particular Olaf Peterson who happens to stick gH&fau up. House windows placarded liPPT'Flee from the Wrath," In tho middle of the town an immense round tent shelters the Sovcnth Day Adventists, who bawl their patent fiendshifting nostrum in a way more worthy of the proprietors of Master Seagull's Shyropc than of the Galilean Peasant who said somewhere "Thou sbalt not atrivo or cry," Alas poor Christ I Too impulsive wert thou, too regardless of the possible, the practicable. Yot shalt thou have thy day. _ It will bo when theso noisy caricaturists of thy " Bwcet reasonableness " have passed away together to their imaginary holla,

In Palmerston, the Jurobnck monopolisis vex us no more; ihe religious qnaok shouteth not; wo liave the yeoman, tin l busy tradosman, tho typical Hull. And what a beust Bull is. Bull of Bulls go to Bulla and seo Mm. Bad cigars ho loves, and much bad boer madoof gloucoso, and badder whiskey made of raw grain. Spring mattresses, whereon you vibrate, sleepless, Great fetds at midday, in sweltering summer, on hot fat beef, and tough fowls, and smoking turnips and many flies, As to a lettuce, a tomato, or a flask of good red wine yon nmy whistle, After much cursing Bull has permitted the existonce of a bathroom in tome hotels. Think he uses it ? Course lio does. He wiisl.es his boots there, and the femalo of his species empties her (wo will say the washing basin) into ils oderiferou3 recesses. Dull also has " conveniences " attached to his hotels, about which anything I could say would probably exasperate your readers, who aro after all Bulls, of tho Bull, Bullish, so that thoy would privily lay in wait for mo, and mop the floor, (what floor ?) with me, This might lie well, as tho floor remains nnmoppod, but not well for me, eo I forbear,

From Palmerston I wont to landing. Tho platform as f left was crowded with Bull; tho monarch of the herd was an apparition in bolltopper, long black coat, and longer black hair. Answered to tho name of Smith, and had a mission to reclaim Bull from beer, He wis surrounded by Salvationists and Wesleyana and Baptists, and while I was looking for some good insecticide and my cyclone nozzle, thinking they could he sprayed and got rid of like the green beetle, the train steamed off, Bull likes being reclaimed. It pleases him asmuch as it pleases n pig to be scratched with a rake. But lie goes back to his dinner after a course of Smith, At Feihiing I met tho Boss, and will rcsumo this 'alo in your next.— Pahkiua Mar.