THAMES TITTLE TATTLE

Observer, Volume 2, Issue 48, 13 August 1881, Page 555

THAMES TITTLE TATTLE

— J. E. T. still longs for the dear departed. Miss Whyte was considered the belle of the rink ball. It has leaked out that the dragon of Parawai fully expected Weston, Clophier and Home to propose to her three Graces. What a " boil over." The only malt treatment the Baron's beer receives is inside the brewery, though, we are free to confess there may be mal treatment outside. — The Colonel says he intends giving up playing 100, and becoming a county councillor for Ohineinuri. He has only to get the votes, and his return is certain. # — The accountant at the U nion is red hot— -in fact, as warm ns a furnace over the par in last week's Observer, and I have therefore deemed it necessary to insure my life. . , . . i , , As " Jerseys are going out in Auckland, they ore coming 1 in on the Thames. Miss H.s navy blue jersey is a splendid fit. and a nice contrast to the Lindsey skirt she invariably dons when going out for a constitutional. —The custodian of the Public Library had better mind what he is about. Several complaints have reached me regarding his officiousness and incivility, and I hope he will accept a word in season, or I shall be compelled to give instances. . —Alex. A. the C.C.C.E., has had his screw advanced to £400. Alex 8., his mutual friend, managed it, and not only did nil the Councillors vote, but -had a minute entered on the books declaring him to be " a jolly good fellow." Alex, shouted whiskeys all round on the subject. ... —Charade suggested by the Thames miking operations : „,,,• My first is a letter pronounced with a hiss, My second's the name of the girl I would kiss My whole is a fish that is found in home waters, And sis flat as the fellows who rink with our daughters. Answer.— Skate. —Miss F. P., of the Thames, has just returned from Auckland, where she has been spending the scholastic holiday. One of her chief amusements at the North Shore was fishing, and she delighted the household one afternoon by carrying to the hotel m triumph seven fresh herrings. The family says the " fry \xp" was delicious. , ■„.,. —Sam M., to whose baby-minding proclivities I 1 called attention last week, took the Observer round

about to his friends and read aloud the baby story. At length being laughed at, poor Sam didn't like it, and retorted by saying, " what is fun to you might be death to me." "Ah," replied a looker-on, "You should remember, old man, that scandal is like a tin kettle tied to a dog's tail— very good fun as long as 'taiu't our dog." Bam says he'll mind no more babies. —I felt highly amused at the last sitting of the Thames County Council at the way in which Mr Councillor Brown rated the good people of Paeroa, whose representative ho is. They were, he said, a remarkably happy family, and ought to be left alone to settle their own difficulties. Altogether, they were a pretty kettle of fish, and no_ two of them, could be fourd. to agree on any one point under Heaven. Happy Paeroa ! It is evident, therefore, that " Honest John" intend^ bequeathing his constituents to the Colonel. —Dick H. does very well on the strength of being 1 believed to be the Observer correspondent. One night last week he consumed no less than six whiskeys within an hour on this wise. Lively sparks seek his society and say, " Let's go in and have a liquor up, Dick." " Right," replies Dick, who is then treated to a story, which Tom, let me call him, would like to have put in the Observer. Harry comes next with a nice little tit-bit, and so Dick drinks the shout, and promises attention. Your own got him to promise to do a bit iv the same line one evening, but it has not yet appeared. Dick, however, says the Observer correspondence is not a bad sj)ec. — An amusing incident occurred at the goods wharf on Sunday evening. Two eminent members of the legal profession arrived from Auckland by the Rotoniahana, and as the tide was out at the time they were compelled to complete the journey in a small rowing boat. On reaching the wharf in the skill' it was found impossible to ascend the steps, and a rope was thrown down from a vessel lying alongside, by means of which the Aucklanders were requested to haul themselves up. Mr Edwin H. was certain he could accomplish the feat, but his swatthy friend E. K. T. felt sure he would " lob" in the mud if he. started up that rope, and he declined to exhibit his capabilities iv that direction. The predicament in which Mr T. was placed, considerably amused his fellow passengers, who expected to see an interesting exhibition. At last the difficulty was solved, much to the dark man's satisfaction. Captain Farquahar procured a ladder, which, by the way, was out of repair, and by means of it the members of the " Devil's Own" reached the floor of the wharf without mishap, although once or twice an accident nearly occurred. — We have a nice littie bit of amusement going on now between Messrs Deeble and Greenville. The latter owns a battery ; the County Council having ■ diverted the watercourse leading to his battery he claimed compensation. A committee of the Council reduced, the amount from £75 to £50. When the recommendation of the committee came before the C.C., Greenville voted in his own interest, for which he has been ousted from office at the instigation of Deeble. The ex-Councillor seeks re-election, but Deeble has gone for him in introducing another candidate. Greenville says the hull can't put a sentence together correctly, and is not fit for that august assembly. Of course, having taken claxsknl degrees, Greenville is an authority on such matters, and would do honor to the post of Minister of Education. His speeches never in the least savour of vituperation, and he always refrains from allowing personal animus to bias him in discussing county matters. Consequently, the chairman has had no . necessity of calling him to order. The question which concerns him most now is — " which way does the bull run ?"