SOME THOUGHTS ON GIVING AND RECEIVING HOSPITALITY

Sun (Auckland), Volume III, Issue 799, 21 October 1929, Page 5

SOME THOUGHTS ON GIVING AND RECEIVING HOSPITALITY

(Written for THE, SUH by the Home Economics Association.}

Hospitality judiciously cxer- . cised and gratefully accepted, I is such a brightener of the hum- ! drum monotony of our workaday lives that it is unfortunate that vulgar display and ostentation should sometimes completely destroy its simple charm. If we had more of the spirit of our pioneer settlers, who so earnestly felt that the simple fact of possessing a home of one’s own implies the autv and privilege of sharing it, we should not be so apt to think and say, “I can’t rossibly ask people to visit me unless can give them the comforts and luxuries that they are accustomed to,” forgetting that a pleasant change is always invigorating and that if, say, the Governor-General and his wife were to propose paying us a visit, it might be really quite an enjoyable variety for them to have a simple, inexpensive afternoon tea served to them by their hostess herself. A dear old lady who, late in life, had become very wealthy, used sometimes to say, “In my days of poverty, one of my great pleasures was that I had to do the waiting on friends who came myself. It seemed a sweet addition to the words of welcome to* add the deeds.” It is much better to entertain on a simple scale, and to do it really well, than to attempt elaboration beyond both one’s power and one’s purse. The harmonious atmosphere of a well-kept home, however simple, is more conducive to comfort and happiness than the most elaborate and expensive restaurant gathering could possibly be. A “Cooked Hostess.” Whatever form of entertainment you are planning to have, don’t serve a cooked hostess as the first course. For afternoon tea, white and brown bread and butter and sandwiches, and one or two sorts of cake, served with really well-made, hot tea, are more enjoyable, ahd certainly much more wholesome, than the bewildering display of rich cakes and cream fillings that some women wear themselves out in preparing for their guests. If you propose to give a luncheon or dinner party, a simple, well balanced meal (which, if it has to be cooked by the hostess herself, should as far as possible have been prepared before the arrival of the guests) that shows consideration of your guests’ individual likes and preferences, is alw r ays more acceptable and in better taste than an elaborate menu that has exhausted both yourself and your finances.

Perhaps the most common form of entertainment in these busy days is the evening gathering, and here there are some points that it is well to bear in mind : 1. Don't ask, for the same evening, guests who are utterly uncongenial to each other. The unselfish guest will always try to appear happy and amused, but we know that, under these circumstances. all cannot he so. 2. Without trying to “boss” your guests, remember that the duty of the hostess is to direct their activities, and arrange beforehand a programme lor the evening that will keep everyone pleasantly and congenially employed.

3. Don’t rely too heavily ou “refreshments.” If you press your guests to partake of sweetmeats at frequent intervals throughout the evening, they will be in no condition to enjoy the supper you have prepared for them. Guests Coming To Stay. With regard to staying guests, there arc one or two points about their entertainment that are sometimes overlooked 1. When giving an invitation, always say exactly how long you desire the pleasure of your friend’s company. It may be embarrassing to both hostess and guest not to have a very definite understanding on this point. 2. The thorough airing of the spare room, and especially of the spare-room bed, must be carefully attended to. If at all cold, a little fire in the room is a welcome in itself, and takes away that chilly atmosphere that characterises some unused rooms. 3. Everyone likes a few bright flowers in the room, but be careful not to choose heavily-scented ones for this purpose. 4. Do Hie best y ou can to make your guests comlortabie of happy, but do. not work yourself into a nervous fever by trying to provide them with luxuries that you would not think of indulging in yourself. greatest compliment wc can pay our triends is to take it for granted that they have come to enjoy tile pleasure of our society, and not to obtain lood and recreation from us. The Guest’s Duties. The guest as well as the hostess has sonic duties, and an important one to remember is that she must not follow her hostess about, asking questions, and getting in the way when she is busy, but, if any work is entrusted to her, she must do it so thoroughly and well as to show that she really wishes to help. She can always keep her own room tidy, and be even more careful of every object in it than she is of her own belongings. She must show her appreciation ct the efforts that are made to entertain her, and do all in her power to give as well as to receive pleasure.

\\ hen the day for her departure arrives, she must allow her kind hostess to say: “We have enjoyed your visit. I wish you could have stayed longer,” without accepting those words as an invitation for a longer visit; but if some definite time of extension is mentioned, such as, “Will you stay a day longer?” or “over the week-end,” she may, if she wishes, gratefully accept. Some years ago the “Woman’s Magazine” published the following description of THE PERFECT GUEST. She answered , by return of post , The invitation of her host. When offered lukewarm tea she drank it. And did not crave an extra blanket , A 'or extra pillow for her head. She seemed to like the spare-room bed . She broiujht her own self-filling pen , And always went to bed at ten. She left no little things behink, But stories new and gossip kind.