How to Run an Election

Feilding Star, Volume XIII, Issue 151, 18 June 1892, Page 2

How to Run an Election

• : — -♦— — — — ■ " ' ".Nemo ''.in the Dunedia Star says :-r " I suppose. lam not obliged to say/how ■■•■ the little things I am occasionally enabled to publish direct from the Cabinet Room leak out. Here is one of them, concern* ing which I have much pleasure m,stating without reserve that it is 'at .leasttas ; : authentic as a good many other -Cabinet communications haying direct Minis -> terial authority : — „ >. ■;,:,.- --•' Hon. J. B. : Well, gentlnmen, -things look precious queer for us up atßangi-' tikoi. Who's going to. bell the cat? ■ "Chorus of Ministers: Oh, you go. You were there the other day you know, You ought to kuow how to fix things. Give them the country edition of ouri policyi as usual. We T will ;see . that the usual apology is 'matte jo the Trades and Labor Council, and the usual assurances that the country edition is not to be taken seriously. They quite see that we mast ' humbug those infernal farmers, and don't realiy mind so long as they know we are not in earnest. " ' r> "-iti - "Ken J. B. : Oh^ihaf s right I dare say— in fact, I haVe their written leave to go pretty far, so long as I take it all back again in ray town performances. Bnt I am hot going back io Feilding, thank you, . : " Chorus (as before): Why? Hon J. B, : I haven't felt well or eaten; i a square meal since the, Bruce election^ • and the reversal of the ■ Feilding vote, :- after I had so carefuilv-arranged things, pretty- well finished me. I have never got such a slap in the face since those awk« ward little matters came out at the Hutchison triaL ••■..-. ; : ;. : ,'A " Chorus : Ob, you're much too thin* skinned. What does it. matter *tprliafc| people say so long as we stay in and'havef | a good time ? Stout is right still^ne hates the others far too much to' leire 3 us id '*: ourselves, and as long- as he pulls steering gear there's no feat of wreck, j Why, he is actually standing up for you' L down South about the Hutchison thing. : If that don't convince you that he'll stand anything rather than stop propping us up, nothing will. . Hon. J. B. (sulkily) : Oh, it's all Very well to talk, but I should like to. see any V of you go cadging for votes round a place where you'd been snubbed as I waa &t Feildmg. How would you to like me to ask you to 3how your noses m Bruce, for instance? . ... " Hons. Seddon and M'Kenzie (starting to their feet) : We didn't come here to be . - insul— — . (Exifc Hon. J. 8., slamming : the door)."