HOW DO YOU TREAT HIM?

Waikato Times, Volume 127, Issue 21248, 19 October 1940, Page 16 (Supplement)

HOW DO YOU TREAT HIM?

THE MAN YOU PROMISED TO CHERISH A man of wit once said to me. speaking of his charming wife. “Fve never heard Elizabeth say a cross word to anyone—except me.” His remark took toot in my mind, because it so neatly summed up a not at all humorous truth about conjugal behaviour. With a possible few saintly exceptions, wives do have a most curious habit of reserving their worst manners for the husbands whom, by and' large, they hold dearest on earth. And, I make haste to add, vice versa ! Why do we do it ? Why do we greet the grocery boy in the same friendly fashion, day after day—the grocery boy. who. all things considered, does little to merit our solicitous attention—and in the same day-after-day style treat our husbands to a whole gamut of discourtesies, ranging from small acts of thoughtlessness to out-and-out bad temper ? After all we didn’t promise to love and cherish the grocery boy, or any of the other people we see casually. I suppose our paradoxical behaviour had its origin in the homes where we were taught our manners. In most of them, I fancy, there was an unwritten, ironclad rule: If you must behave badly, behave badly at home, and never, never Ift your friends and neighbours know what a nasty person you can be! That was the rule our parents followed, wasn’t it ? In their rare—or frequent, as tjie case may have been—moments ol discourtesy, didn't they take pains that no one should hear or witness their lapses, except their nearest and dearest ? Alas, yes. and alas that we follow in their footsteps ! There is no rule, however, that says we must continue to do so. Courtesies Are Returned By this. I do not mean to suggest that we should reverse our odd system of etiquette and vent our occasional spleen upon chance acquaintances instead of upon our husbands, interesting and admirable v the results of such a procedure might prove. No, I am only proffering, somewhat timidly, the suggestion that we mend our matrimonial manners. Let us say. for example, that tomorrow your husband comes |g into the house with vour best garden mud clinging to his shoes and that he rapidly transfers this mud to your floors. Well, frankly now. what would you say if he were the man from the electric-light company, come to read the meter? Would you tear him to shreds ? Certainly not.

“It doesn’t matter." you’d say. “You can’t help it this time of year.’’ And you'd probably give him a smile when you said it. Why not try that sort of treatment on your husband, just once, when he’s not expecting it ? He won’t drop dead. Instead, if you persist in your experjnents in conjugal courtesy—and there are countless opportunities for experiment, as every wife knows—he’ll probably pay you back in your own golden coin. People are like that: even husbands.