Page 2 Advertisements Column 5

Waikato Times, Volume XXX, Issue 2426, 28 January 1888, Page 2 (Supplement)

His who blackens others does not whiten himself. F.-u.iiOF tub leak. —A lowering of the price of fci. (Jcisky i' : R:iM a Doomed Ose.—As man and wife are one, inn.-f tlm husband, wheu seated with his wife, be beside himwife. A cftntlcman who had benii struck by n lady's beauty has rli;t.ennined to follow the injunction and "kiss the rod that smote him." " Pa" said a smart Ijqj:, '*I know what makes too' 3 laugh in their sleeves." "Well, what makes'em?" "'Cause that's where their funny bone is." Ix Brazil monkeys are found to bo more useful than negroes as agricultural labourers, for we have it on the authority of the Journal De Commercio of Rio de Janeiro that ou a farm whore hemp is grown seven large monkeys have been taught to cut the hemp and prepare it for sale. They work more quii;l;ly than, the negroes, and the cost 01 feet'ing such a working staff is only a trifling matter. The coloured races there , are very inferior to others, Ask no woman her age, Never joko with a policeman. _ Dα not play ;it chess with a widow, Nevar ooutradict a man who stutters. Be civil with rich uncles and aunts. Your oldest hat, of course for an evening party. Always sit next the carver, if you can at dinner. Keep your own secrets. Wind up your conduct like your watch onoe aday minutely examining whether you are fast or slow. Make friends with a ste.vard on board a steamer, there's no knowing how soon you may be in his power,