II. The Modern Bazaar.

Waikato Times, Volume XXVI, Issue 2131, 6 March 1886, Page 2 (Supplement)

11. The Modern Bazaar.

Havk you been in the neighbourhood of tho Seven I)i ds ? Have you chanced to travel down the Nuw Cut ? Has it been your lot to wander along the Katcliff Highway? In short, have yon ever had the gratification of knowing youi self as a unit of morality among-t the most thieving and socially de- \ raved ela«s to be found on any part of the habitable globe? If so, multiply the thieving propensities of this degraded people by ninety and nine nnd yon will obtain a* a result an altogether inadequate i Jen of the character of tho promoter ot a nineteenth century bazaar. The bazaar is universally admitted to be of Eastern origin. Eastern bizaar.s are Eastern markets, where a purchaser may receive full value for the cash he has been induced to expend. Doubtless there have been cases wheru he has paid too dearly for his whittle, but this is u fault wholly attributable to the inferiority of hi« judgment, as it is not absolutely necessary that he pmch.i.se anything, much less an article exceeding its w.lue. Compare an Extern bazaar with our modern ones, which, it is fondly imagined, are modelled on tho Orient il plan; As "a babe in tho house is a well spring of joy," so is a moneyed individual in a modern bazaar. A visitor to one of these haunts of extortion never receives value for his money; is debarred by volatile voices and fair faces from having any judgment of his own ; and, under threats of future displeasuie and everlasting enmity, is compelled to disgorge all the '• filthy lucre " he may chance to have conceded about his person. Young unmarried men are entreated, with unblushing effrontery, to purchase infants' puff-boxes and juvenile underclothing as a necessary adjunct to their personal belongings. With confused, scarlet faces they consent, in order to avoid the laughing comments of moneyless bystanders, and immediately appear to bo ashamed of their purchases, securing them in the deep recesses of hidden pockets. Fathers are induced to believe that endless happiness will accrue if they invest their hard-earned savings in the purchnie of those infernal instruments yclept whistles and drums ; Blue Ribbonites, oveicome by some supernatural influence their aversion to corkscrews ; meat-jacks find eager acceptors in the ijersons of v egetarians ; dice-boxes and playing cards become the property of strict moral-i-.t^, whilst anti sninkers generally find themselves the, possessors of innumerable "•lii'ikimj-cvps and wooden pipes, minus tho mouth-pieces. Then tho Milling is another ititeiusting feature of that pleasant, .snulstin ing entertainment, known to us as the modern b.i/aar. An article costing, say, seven shilling-, and sixpence retail, is raffled amongst thirty subscriber* at one shilling a member— a- tiuly refieshing arrangement, xurely, and one which always meets with a response, though .seldom a ready one. Articles, neither useful nor ornamental, aie. foisted upon you by ticket— the tickets are, if not tho articles. The ai tides, by some extraoulinary fat ility, invariably become the propeity of the promoter of the rattle.^ Having beon a victim, we fcpl that, had Kastcrn b i/airs been arranged on the present pattern, the compilers of the Litany woild ha\e wiitten, "from bazaars, stallholder, and their sitellites, defend us." Puihai* "plague, i>c4,lencc," and, as a M-c >n.),iry cause, " fain lie " embody this. Did V\a author of "\[ i- nv «n " over cousidur th it fair wmunn f<> md t 1,, r «;e factor in causing the "pm and mcruish " to which she H credited w th m.nwteimg in so angelic a manner. Hid Iviaars been a popular form of nation d amusement in his era, how often would his intellectual blow have been wrung by woman's importunate wiles, and how rudely v.Oidd his poetic tiunle have been destroyed on hearing the jarring jest and jjyous laugh which would have greeted tho announcement that his finances were cvImustcd, and that he was a miserable man ' What renders all this the more strange is that persons, in tho full possession of their uie-ntul faculties, not only submit to be

tortured in those diaholic.il ways, but also |).iy an entrince fee for the privilege, of being so sh unefully u-ed. H.is tho Society fi>r tin; Prevention of Cruelty to Aninnli)ii tpiwer to pi.isocute those who m> cruelly m iltrc.it po<>r hum mity in thoHcirch of n little iccrontnm? No: Spartan ro*ignatinn muttt bo their*. Homes may be rendeied unbearable by penny whistle* : youths mar l»n driven to miicidfl by continued solicitations to purchase feeding bottles ; a n<M\oiv<, hiphly-scnsitiro gentlein.in tn.iy become an iiiiu.ite of * lunatic nsvlnin tlir-iiißh the repotted assurances of saleswomen that gaiters and chemises arc necessary to his peace of mind, goncral wclfatc, and the repose of hin soul, nnd yet, yo legislators, redress for thorn is hopeles* !