THERMOMETER PANTS.

Waikato Times, Volume XIX, Issue 1642, 13 January 1883, Page 2 (Supplement)

THERMOMETER PANTS.

MAX HOFFENSTEIN GIVES HIS OPINION. Hoffenstkin was busily engaged sdblding Herman for not polishing a lot of cheap jewellery there was in the showcase^ yrhen a stoop-shouldered countryman entered the store and inquired : "Have you got any good jeans, pants here?" •'Certainly, my frient," replied Hoffenstein. aYea Ye makes a' speciality of goods in dot line, und ye defy compedition. X ye sell anyding und you don't like it, you gets your money back or someding else in exchange, you know. Vas you a farmer ? " " Yes, sir ; I live up on Bed River." ' ' " Veil, den, you need a bair of banis like dese," said Hoffenstein, pulling, out a skyblue pair from a pile of clothing on the counter " Dey vas de genervine doeskin, and. vill last de whole year oud, you^know." The countryman took the pantaloons /fa the light, examined the texture of the cloth, and. then shaking his head knowingly said : " There's too much cotton ,jra them ; they will shrink." ' i " Of course, my frient, dey yill shrink, but vait und. I dells you someding. If a naah vat owns a pank or keeps a store comes here, I don't sell him them kind ,of pariis. Vy ?" Because dey vas made exbressly for de farm* ,jng pizness. Dey vas de 'dermometer, pants,, und a blessing to every farmer yatvearsa. bair uf dem. Do youjknowi my frient/ dose pan_ts vill dell^you jvat de Redder 1 vill be. Yen it vas going to He veVuhd dose; pants vill bggin^tp'shrfiflt up.^und yen it this* going to 6e dry und warm dey comes rig&ti down t you- know. ,Dree years, a g<^/W^^', bair of dem to -a m^n vat vas •name*l^W'b" und effer since, den he makes good cr*^^|S;,A ,de oder people don't make rioding,Jbf*f ~T alw»ys' knows r by* his d^rmdmeter™ 18 Tax? the vedder vill be. , , „, . , , " Afder a vile de be'ople in'deneV bourho °? finds oud de segre.t uf Vilkins' acce33 ' und at de beginning uf de blandinr Beason ' v0 " •know, dey comes for dirty mil. 3 arou £. d » und if dey see Vilkins' bants craw^S ap ,T^.K holds of und,vaits for a^cl an ? c 5 but if his yas do Y n they soes'r'iM back W apd pats inde crop. l)ink' «f« f &*& *?****• MA de dermometer ba^ts yoa; ca ° Jfll exactly yen to put, in cabbage s^d./ na bla^> ?? m dwice as better asmii s alf anac,. Besides, yen the wedder getr 80 9 old vet ot * bants goes up xint&J 0 ™ t™*^™^*? buttons on defron^V^v 4 ffl S- <u| & V Ylhm Hoffen,t^f ed conthe store. ■•' ■'-• 'v * -n ' "Did you pe^'w 8 va y do . fc «iatt .acted, Herman ?" said mi^rißtem, angrily, •" "Yes sir " /replied the clerk, , ' , {>/t , , ' " VeU I it i"!^ 8 show^'dqt demore yota tryS^help/spme beople along , de mmtpjan 4ori't\/got/ any^dan^s, for itfr-Bjirpicigton

A'in^wlio^dve^isecfior an «JawSssfrifo,* r ' ' fiad|SH been in the^^ase.^^pty-fpur.liours.

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