HE DEALT ON SQUARE.

Waikato Times, Volume XVIII, Issue 1535, 6 May 1882, Page 4

HE DEALT ON SQUARE.

Wsffc^iV \i tall Voting oMweritf latfiVetl'^thfe Union dep'oi witWA/btinHie finder his arm, and, after throe or four minutes spent in getting his bearings, he walked up Jefferson' avenue and turned into a clothing store. "Do you vish to try 6n some coats' and vesfes'for a dollar V • a&e'd the proprietor, "as hS 'rushed 'from behind tlic counter*. ■ *♦ No, P'guera n6t. Do 1 y cm ' deal on : the square ?" "My f rent, dot is exactly vot I does. I vas so square dot I lose SOOOdol. last year. Can I sell you an overcoat for lOdol. ?" "No, 1 - 1' guess not. Here is an "overcoat that I bought off you four weeks ago. " ' * Bought off me?" ' "Yes, I flunk you ard the man. When I got home ye found that it w.is moth-eaten. I can pick itt6 pieces in a dozen places." "Is dot possible ! ,Und how much yon pay ?" ; " Eight dollars. " "My shtara ! Und vhat you vant now?" "I want niy » money back ?" l"Vhell, vhell. Myfrent,l'msorryfor-you. You seem like an honest boy,' and it vhas too bad." " Yes, it was a 'swindle, and I want my monay back." " Dear me, but I vish 1 you vhas here yesterday. Let me explain to you. You bought dot coat four weeks to-day. "Vliel!, I'ha'di sold oudt to my cousin Philip shust 'one day before. Philip ish a square man." " What have I" got to do with Philip ?" "Let me explain, in three days Philip makes assignment to my brudder Louis. Dot Louis is a leddle • off. He would slieat your high' teeth ,away from you." " Yes, but I haWfr-anything to do with , Louis." ," Let me explain, Louis keeps der place a week, und he gives a shattel mortgage to my fadfler-in-law, and vhas bounced out." " I don't know anything about that." " Let me explain. My fadder-in-law was took mit a fit and died, and he leaf dis place to my wife. My wife vas g6ne to Europe for two years, and she leaf me as agent. Now you see how it vhas. I can not tell you who sold dot coat. May be it vas Philip, may be Louis, and may be fadder-in-law. It couldn't have been me, for I vas in Shicago. If you leave dot coat I will write to my wife. She is square, shust like me, and may be &he" writes back dot you can take a linen duster and two white % ests and call it all right." "Say, this is a sneaking swindle," exclaimed the young umii. •' May be it vas. Philip was a great liar." " I'll go to the police."" Veil, dob is all right : may be - dor police will help me catch Louis. I slnist found out last night dot he cut all der hind buttons of all der coats in der store before he left." "If you'll step outdoors I'll mash you." ' '• Veil, I like to oblige, but you f>ee I was only agent f<v my wife." " Well, you'll hear from me again, a'ld don't you' forget it," said the victim as. he went out. " I hope so ; I hope so. I like to make it all right. I was only ngtint for my wife, but I feul so hquarc dot I take dot coat back for dree dollars if you want to trade it out in paper colhus." — flrfrti' Fn'« 7'#w.

lii Denmark, in the management of the rlai i y, rape cake, oats and wheat In an are icch'onccl as first-class bnttov foods, palmnut enko and barley as second-class foods, while Unseed eako, and ryo arc placed in thethnd eln->s. By the employment of fint-clas-i foot's, witli out straw, h.iy and r.ioti. an ,»buudnncc of buttji is produced thiotujhont the winter. (li.m:k\l Skobi:t,ofk. — The AUgeiiiniir /nt inn/, a, leading German paper published at Augsburg, has the following lcnni ks 011 the personal character of the odelnated Russian General :-— General Kkobeloff, a man of thirty-eight years of age, is a thorough soldier, and regards wav as his element. lie has perfected his undoubted military genius by deep .study ; he is now a general of cavalry, Commander ot the Order of St George, and— a celebiated man, Great as his military advantages are, the qualities of his character are little esteemed in the circle in which he moves. The good uatured Prince "Michael Nikola] jevitch took him with him, on his completing his studies at the Staff Colleges, as an. orderly officer, but was soon compelled to send him away. Although he is the national and popular hero of the Russian people, he does not enjoy the sympathy of good society. Richly endowed by nature in every respect with an attractive exterior, winning manners and the most polite ways, and educated in positive science, the brilliant young general creates a favorable impression. And yet there is scarcely any bad quality which in St. Petersburg is not attributed to him— not merely by his enemies and those who envy him, who are naturally many, but by the best circles in Russian society. He is said to be an intriguer, heartless, brutal, and cynical, devoid of all noble feeling, unprincipled and unscrupulous. Tilings are told of his severity and cruelty while in Central Asia which make one's hair stand on end. WhateA er exaggeration there may bo in this, the judgment is too unanimous for one to doubt its truth. And yet this man is the national hero, and decidedly the most popular character in the Russian Umpire, the god of the masses whom he knows how to flatter — a man who, consumed by ambition, treats even fanaticism as a means to an end, and evidently may be destined to play a conspicuous part in the history of Russia. It is characteristic of him that, although he Avent to the "Balkan campaign without any command even on account of his notoriety, his capacity soon availed him, ■ and lie returned home after a few months as one of the most celebrated generals. The Emperor Alexander 111., who by no means likes a man who is more than infamous in military life, will keep this geneial as far as possible from him ; but lie may be compelled, in case of serious complications, to pppcal to SkobelofF. If he lives, he will be the leader whom one will have most to think about. Thjj Pktmt, ov Walks' Vi<-rr to a Cowne Hall. — The Prince of Wales, Mho has ever shown himself a generous patron of the theatres and other places of amusement in the west end of London, has visited the Victoria Coffee Hall—the old "Vie"— on the Surrey side of the water, and in his benevolent motive to give encouragement to this excellent effort, to develope temperance entertainments, he was accompanied by his amiable Princess ond the Duke and, Duchess of Teqki The entertainment consisted of an Irish ballad concert, and, it was the Prince's, expressed wish that the old traditionary customs of the "Vic M should not bp altered, but that the regular lirrbitups of the theatre should enjoy themselves in their wonted manner. Accordingly the singular spectacle "was Avitn'esscd of a front row gallery sitting, in the' presence of royalty minus coats and collars, and with shirt sleeves tuoked up, smoking their short pipes, and enjoying themselves ' as much for their three-pence as would the halfcrown occupants of Her Majesty's Theatre. One curious incident is woitli recording. Just at the moment that the royal party entered a vocalist, was sing,ing, { f The Minstrel Boy," and the song was brought to ! an abrupt conclusion. The transpontine boy's 'would not approve of 'this, and shouted ',' Go' on, 'with the song, " That be, Mowed'," and' 'other, kindred sentiments. ' Then the .National ' Anthem , was 'sjiug, 'and' they realised ' fact of the august .preseiice, but' theyV" in-, sisted upon' the completion' of tih'e'sjonc'of' , '• The Minstrel Boy," and tKe'sftSSerliad 1 to, cdihe Lack' 'and' 'finish', & ' '"WhVcari say 'thills' n6tf d? %cd ' cod fatry 1 ] ' f THe, Prince and P^ince&s', stayed 'uritil '^Ho, cldse of. the performance; {