MERCER REFRESHMENT ROOMS.

Waikato Times, Volume XV, Issue 1271, 21 August 1880, Page 3

MERCER REFRESHMENT ROOMS.

TO THE EDITOR. Sir, — I am at a loss to know why they call that place on the platform of Mercer a Refreshment Room. As far as I can see anyone can get a drink there, although it states in the specifications that they are only for the convenience of bonafidc travellers by rail, and on no account is any spirits to be sold to a railway servant or the successful tenderer shall forfeit &c. How far this is carried out we travellers know, lam sure, JSir, anyone travelling a few times by rail must take notice of the brothei-ly love that reigns between the Lessee and the Stationmaster there, whose duty it is to see the specifications carried out but who is blind to all its classes. — I am &c, TRAVELLER.

A lady passenger, whose baby kept up a dismal and incessant bawling to the sore distress of everybody in the car, apologetically observed to a gentleman in the next seat, " I hope you like children sir?" "I do indeed," was the reply, " but I like 'em corked up." When spelling is "reformed," she'll write : "I'm sailing on the oshun ; The se is hi, no sale in site, It fils me with emoshun." But one " spell" will not change its name, For she'll be se sik just the saim ! — Amcriccoi Queen. Professor : Which is the most delicate of the senses ? Sophomore : The tonch. Prof. : Prove it. Soph. : When you sit on a tack. You can't hear it, you can't see it, you can't taste it, you can't smeli it, but it's there. M. Guizot, while on a visit to Lord Aberdeen in Scotland, was talking to him in the park one day about the English system of elections, when his host stopped before a modest cottage. ' { This little house," he said, " recalls to me a shameful deed in my political life. "What! an "act of violence V" " You shall hear. I had a tenant here, an independent fellow, who annoyed me horribly. In every election he strenuously opposed me. I made up my mind to get rid of him." "Ha! you turned him out?'' No. I reduced his rent by a guinea, and destroyed his qualification. A mean trick, and I've always been ashamed of it." An American paper is responsible for the statement th it ab a recent representation of "Belshazzar" at Bridgepoit the following took place: "It ssems that during the intermission Daniel aud Belshcizi.ir t-teppert out to get a drink, and one of the Babylonians followed, aud wanted to bet that Bridgeport would go Democratic. A discussion ensued, and when the curtain rang up, the B ibylonian was unable to see out of one eye, and Belhhazzar dropped out four front teeth in merely saying 'I am vhe king. ' Tho audience, being a critical one, took the ground that their appearance was not historically accut ate, and demanded theiv money back." Old Joe Hemlock one of the blackest coloured men m Detroit, was promenading through the editorial roomsof the Free IVrsv, in search of money enough to buy a now pair of boots, and the sight' of him revealed an old recollection. In 1861 after the retreat from Bull Run, the Third Michigan Infautry went into camp at Hunter's Place, and old Joe then a middleaged darkey came into the camp as a runaway. Colonel M'Uonnell soiz d him fora cook,and after instruction Joe was given in charge of the colonel's kitchen. His first ir eal was dinner, aud about time for it to appear ho walked in on the colonel made a very low bow, and said : " Kernel, I'zc not quite up to the situation jistyJt. You tole me to b.ike beans, didn't you?" •' I did." "Worry well, sih; de beans am baked. You tolo me to fry lnm didn't you:-" "I did" "Weiry well, -ah;dc ham am fried. Now did you say I were to bile the coffee in de kernel, or, or — — " "No— no — who ever heard of making coffee in that way!'" "Well dats what 1 fought; but kernel, it am 'an awf ul slow job for one nigger to craok all dat coffee tween his teef, and dinners gwine to be half an hour ate suah's yoor bo n.'l At Cambridge, Geucr.il Washington had heard that the coloured Foldieis were no-, to be depended upon for sentries. 80 one night, when the pass-Avord was " Cambridge," he went outside the camp put on an overcoat, and approached the colou-ed sentinel. "Who goes there?" cried the sentinel. "A fiiend," replied Washington, ''Friend, advance unarmed, and give the counters'gn," said the coloured man. Washington came up and said, " Roxbury." " No, sar ?" was tho response. "Medford," said Washington. " No, sar !" returned the coloured soldier. " CJharlestown," paid Washington. The coloured man immediately exclaimed, " I tell you what, sar, no man go by hei'e 'out he say 'Cambridge.'" Washington said " Cambridge," and went by, but the next day the coloured gentleman was lelieved of all further necessity for attending to that brarich of military duty. The Archduke Rudolph proposed in person to Princess Stephanie of Belgium at an evening party given in his honor at the Chateau de Laken on March 7th. Among the amusements were conjuring performances by the celebrated prostidigitateur, Professor Herman, and a concert in the magnificent conservatory attached to the castle. Matters had been so arranged that when the company were conducted from the saloon in which Herrman had held his seance to tho Winter Garden the Archduke and Princess were left together tete-a-tete for a few minutes. As soon as they were alone the future Emperor-King approached her Ro3 r al Highness with a low and formal obeisance, saying 1 , " Madam, will you take me for a husband ?" to which plain question the Princess simply replied, curtseying deeply, "Yes, your Imperial Highness." " Your Royal Highness's answer makes me supremely happy," observed the Archduke. "And I," rejoined Princess. Stephanie, " promise that I will do my duty towards you under all circumstances." No more was said, but the youthful pair, joined the Royal circle in the Winter Garden, and the Archduke leading his fair companion up to her father, addressed King Leopold as follows: — "Sire, I have with your Majesty's permission begged the Princess Stephanie to bestow her hand upon me. It is my happy privilege to inform you that my petition has been granted." "I rejoice, Monseigneur," replied the King, "to greet you as my son-in-law." The Princess embraced her mother, and immediately afterward fie imperial royal to'rothal was announced '0 the assembled compan/.

In Chelsea, Massachusetts, a young man named Phillsbury recently spent about three weeks in building a guillotine composed of two upright piec9S of joist, on the inside of which a hollow block of wood was arranged to slide. Firmly set in the place thus made was a carpenter's broadaxe, evidently sharpened for the ocoasion. On top of the, block which held the axe was a block of stones weighing about 50 pounds. A wooden lever supported this contrivance, and from this a cord led to a watering pot. The pot was filled with water, and just balanced the box of stones ; but two holes had been drilled in it, and when sufficient water had ruff gut the weighted axe descended. The man's ingenuity did not end there, for he had hollowed out a block of wood and filled it with ether, so that when he lay down on a bed of hay, which he had prepared, his free was directly over the anaesthetic. Boxes of brick were placed on either side of the head, so that he could not dodge the blow, and a brace was affixed to hold his head to the floor. The machine worked perfectly, and Phillsbury, whose ancestors were insane' doubtless died a painless death. Where he got His Authority.— "l call on you," said the counsellor, "to state distinctly upon what authority you are prepared to swear to the mare's age F" " Upon what authority P" said the other, interrogatively. • ' You are here to reply, and not repeat the questions pu 6 to you." " I don't consider a man bound to answer a question afore he's time to turn it into his mind. " Nothing can be more simple, sir, than the question put. I again repeat — upon wkat authority do you swear to the animal's ago ?" " The best authority," responded the witness, gruffly. "Then, why such evasion? Why not tell it at once F" " Well, then, if you must have it " "Must I I will have it," vociferated the counsellor, intenupting the witness. "Well, then, if you must and will have it," rejoined the hostler, with imperturble gravity, " why then, I had it myself from the mare's own mouth." A simultaneous burst of laughter ran through the Court.