MR SNYDER INFORMS MRS S. THAT HE WANTS TO BECOME A BOROUGH COUNCILLOR.

Waikato Times, Volume X, Issue 790, 10 July 1877, Page 2

MR SNYDER INFORMS MRS S. THAT HE WANTS TO BECOME A BOROUGH COUNCILLOR.

Mr Snyder went home one morn§ ing about eleven o'clock, and told Mrs Si that he intended to stand for Borough Councillor. " Mrs S., at the time, was preparing a pumpkin pie for dinner. When she heard the announcement, she sat down on the corner of a chair, the flour reaching to her elbows. She said, Snyder, you are going to make a spoon of yourself, as you have done many a time since I've known you. That's what you are going to be at. . What do you want to be a Councillor for ? Arn't you at peace with yourself and all the world? Then why do you wish to rush into strife. Mr Snyder said it was a great honor to be a Councillor. It showed what confidence the burgesses placed m him. Besides there was ho knowing what would come of it. Attorney-Generals, Premiers, Chief Justices anl Commissioners of ever so many things had been Councillors. What was to prevent him from becoming one of them? Mrs a. thought there was about as much chance of Mr Snyder becoming one of them as the pumpkin on the table had had of becoming a pineapple. The chance was more m favor of the pumpkin. Mr Snyder didn't like to be made fun of by his wife, and he told her so. Mrs S. thought it was better to be made fun of by her who had some sort of respect for him, which perhaps, after all was more than he was entitled to look for, than by a lot of people who didn't care whether he: had button to his shirt, or went to work without his boots being blacked. Mr Snyder thongbt Mrs S. was wandering from the subject. Mrs S. said to be sure and of. course. She was always wandering from her subject m Mr Snyder's opinion when she tried to prevent him making a idiot of himself. What did Mr Snyder want to be getting into hot water for, which he would be sure to do. What did he want to be set up and knocked down and sat upon by the newspapers, aud told by the people he was robbing 'em, and to be called a log-roller, and that he was spending other people's money m making a gravelled footpath m front of his own door, and a metaled right-of-way at the back, while other people who paid for it had to wade through water and mud to get to their dwellings. And what did he want to be wasting his precious time for, and only get abuse instead of thanks for it ? Mr Snyder said virtue brought its own reward. The consciousness of trying to do good for his fellow citizens, was ample satisfaction. He shouldn't be losing his time, as the Council sittings would take place ofrj an evening Mrs S. knew all about that. There was a Councillor Wilkins m the last town she lived m, and he used to come home at eleven or twelve at night, and sometimes at one or two m the morning, and he always made the excuse that there had been a late sitting and a long debate, and that he had been engaged fighting what he called the battle of the burgesses. Burgesses indeed ! Why, one morning 1 when her husband returned long after midnight, complaining how completely done up he was, and how exhausted he was and how he must have some brandy and water, when the next morning, as Airs Wilkins happened to take up the paper, which the runner boy had dropped at the door, almost the first words she read at the bottom of the column were : ' And the Council adjourned at 9 p.m. till that day week.' Then she found it all out. — Found out that the Councillors got. over their work as soon as they could aud then went boozing away for hours m the parlors of public housas. The Councillors afterwards bribed the reporters not to put the hour of adjournment m the paper, but, once bit twice shy. Mrs Wilkins wasn't to be done again. The next meeting nighfc she walked square into the Council and moved a resolution, seconded it and carried it all herself, without asking any help or giving time for an amendment, that her husband be requested to return home there and then, or she would pull out what little hair he had left on his head. And it wasn't many clays before Mr Wilkins sent m his resignation. Mrs S. long before she had concluded, had worked herself up to a very high pitch of excitement, and she was not soothed when Mr Snyder told her to scrape the flour off her face and nose, which she had coated them with, or there wouldn't be enough Mb to complete the pumpkin pie. 8,v% S, .supposed the fiv3tj thing

Mr Snyder would be at if he got into the Council would be to tax the people Mr Snyder said that would be about it. There was an inherent propensity m man to tax his fellow man. Ifc W as a sweet revenge for the wrongs he had|jsaffered m his career through life Mrs Snyder supposed that very soon people wouldn't be able to keep a pig, or a goat, or a few fowls, or throw their potato peels out of tho back yard, or have liberty to do anything. N Mr Snyder was*,of opinion that Mrs S. had supposed just tho right thing : or else what was tho r use of being a Councillor. Mrs S. considered that Mr Snyder would be selling his birthright for a messofponidge. MrS. said that she meant pottage? Mrs S. didn't mean anything of the - kind. She meant just what she said. Mr S. could make it potage or porridge to his fancy as long as ho didn't try to aggravate her. Then Mr Snyder entered upon a calm explanation. He told Mrs S. what a nice thing it would be for her to be looked upon as a Councillor's wife. How she could write home to all her relations and tell them what her husband had risen to, because they wouldn't of course know that any one who paid a few shillings a year for rates could be a Councillor if he got enough votes. I[e told her how when he became Councillor she would have to have a new silk dress and how she would be invited out to tea parties, and of course go to the ball to be given to the Prince of Wales, when he came to Gisborne. He told her how savage and wild Mrs Stuckup and the Chickabiddie set and the other women would be when they heard • her addressed as Mrs Councillor Snyder, while their own husbands had to submit to being taxed by him and their tenders rejected and the like. Then the clouds which had so long gathered about Mrs S. began to clear away and she thought upon consideration that she would have no objection to Mr S. going into the Council. Mr Snyder said there was only one slight drawback "Mrs S. wished to know what that was. Mr S. said he was not 'qualified.' 4 Mrs S. wanted to know what that meant. She supposed he could read and write. . Mr S. said neither of these acquirements were necessary to become a Councillor. Mi-s S., next wanted to know whether Snyder did not pay his butcher, and his baker, and his grocer, and his landlord to the last farthing-, and everybody else. Mr S. said these virtues did not constitute a qualification. Mrs S. wanted to know chen what did ? Mr S. said being placed on the Burgess Eoll. He was not on it, and was very glad indeed. Then Mrs S. saw that. Mr Snyder had been hoaxing her all the while, and he only cleared the pumpkin by about three iuches as he bolted out of thj door. — * Poverty Bay Standard.'