AN ESSAY ON GIRLS.

Westport Times, Volume III, Issue 450, 9 January 1869, Page 3

AN ESSAY ON GIRLS.

I don't like girls. Grirls is different from what, boys is. Girls don't play marbles, and also don't play hookey. I played hookey once, and got whipped for it. Grirls sometimes get whipped, but not so much as boys ; their clothes ain't so well suited for it; that is the reason, I suppose. I never sees girls play baseball, but they say they do in Boston. There is plenty of girls in Boston and bg organs. Last year, when I was young, the teacher made me set with the girls because I was naughty. I cried. Big boys like girls better than little boys. I went on a sledge-rido, one night, with my sister Nancy and Tom Sykes. We were going to New Hartford, and when we got up by Pegg's tavern, Tom asked me to look in the bottom of the sledge for his whip; while I was looking he fired off a torpedo. I asked him if he had any more torpedoes, and he said no, but he fired off another when I wasn't looking. Grirls don't like to have men them ; they always say " don't." If they wasn't fools they would turn their heads the other way, but they never do that. I saw Tom kiss Nancy once, and told mother. Then my mother put me to bed. When a girl takes out her handkerchief in the streets to wipe her nose, the young men who earn their living by standing in front of the Pine Block always wipe their noses at the same time if they see her. Grirls get married sometimes, but not always. Those that don't get married have a wedding-cake. I like wedding-cake, but I do not see any fuu in getting married, especially to a girl.—American paj)er.