A Scotchman's Philosophy.

Wairarapa Daily Times, Volume XV, Issue 4365, 11 March 1893, Page 3

A Scotchman's Philosophy.

An old Scotchman is said to have risen in prayer-meeting one night and apropos of nothlp? delivered himself of tho following remarks: "There aro three things I nevor coold quito understand. First, why boys will throw sticks at green apples .whon, if they waited, the apples would ripen and drop off; secondly, I nevor could qiiito comprehend why men goto war to kill each other when, if they remainded quietly at home they would die a natural doath in good timo; thirdly') and most important of all, I do not seo why the men chaso round after the women, since, if thoy eat still, tho 'women would run around after thorn." flow truothat death comes to all men, to somo so prematuroly, who neglect thb warning sysmptoms taf approaching disoase, such as a Med aching feeling in the morning, sour tasto in BgfflliSr All these aro signs that tßoJmysical body|is deranged and that it treated lightly, aoriouß danger is to bo apprehended. Alfred Saunders, Esq,, Octagon, Punedin, saysdements Tonio and Fletcher's Pills cured me of nervous debility after I had consulted ten medical menand spent £2OO on their feejandmedloineiTheadvotlisingqugoks robbed me altogether. It is disgraceful that the law allows tho deprecations of theao harpieß, I can honestly recommond Clements Tonic, It muflt be good. Mine waß a bad case, as most of the doctors hero can prove. Of course 1 had to tako a long courßO, but that was to bo expected, for I had been terribly humbugged, but I am at last restored to health and strength solely by Clements Tonic, " '