WELLINGTON.

Wairarapa Daily Times, Volume IX, Issue 2898, 14 May 1888, Page 2

WELLINGTON.

(From Our Own Correspondent)

We Cereraonialise.

Parliament has once more assembled, and having said this ranch, it is cult to say much more on the subject, one Parliament as closely resembling another as do two gooseberries, It is almost unnecessary to add that the accustomed dreary little one-horse ceremonial was observed. First, a small band in big cocked hats played itself down Lambton Quay, headed by a drum major who would have been more imposing had there been more of him, and who ruminated as lie marched, and only occasionally awoke to the fact, that he was, in the eyes of the assembled youths, 110 small beer, The band halted in front of the office of the New Zealand Times and played a' toon' which brought the as iounding Asmodeus to the door, his face wreathed in hair and smiles He evidently supposed the music was a tribute to his greatness. Anon, the Permanent Artillery, a small body of large sad men appeared on the scene, and, behind the dismounted men came three small popguns, rusty and with the l'right work not bright. The guns were drawn by shaggy horses, hairy as to the fetlock, ungroomed, and greasy, and the drivers looked as if they would have been freer from care hat] they a hearse instead of a little gun behind them, The gun carriages had possibly once been washed, but the precise date of the transaction was as much hidden by the thick mists of antiquity as the original paint on the limbers was obscured by dirt. When the artillery had joined the band tho procession mournfully maundered to Parliament House. After an interval the Governor apappeared, very gorgeous in a blue coat profusely ornamented with gold leaf, and his Sunday stocking gn, and we

filed into the Lords, and fought our way through a surging mass of steaming humanity to the Press gallery. The floor of the Chamber was cleared as if for a ball, and a gentleman in a black bed gown and bands was discovered seated on an oasis of dingy carpet facing • the throne. This was the Speaker of the Lower House; behind him, shamefaced and selfconscious, the Commons stood in a lump, melancholy as sheep in a railway truck; 011 either side the Speaker were ladies in remarkably plain costumes, aud to right and left of him, m front, were ranged tiers of mummies in scarlet sarcophagi, supposed to bo Lords—or as much of them as time had left. From the Gallery the Governor was not visible, but we soon heard him read in his very best tones the Speech from the Throne, the manner of delivery irresistibly reminding us of a once familiar formula: " 'Tention 1 pay 'tention to the proceedings of a District Court Martial." All things Bublimary end. The speech at last was ended aud nobody much hurt. Then there was a rustling of legs and sword-scabbards, King Jervois descended his dais, tho Speaker got up and the Commons scattered to right and left. There was a glint of: a' golden back, the lustrous, sheen of Sabbath stockings, and the Governor, poking a roll of paper into the Speaker's hand, burst gorgeous upon

the outer sun-light, where lie was assisted to his carriage. The Band; commenced to play, some crackers were let off in the far distance, the public—or as much of it as held the necessary lucre—took a liquor, aud the harmless little farce was over. Rosebud Pyke., . The perennial Pyke was the rccipien t of a box containing one hundred and fifty rosebuds. A lady at the Hutt is supposed to have been the donor, but Mr Pyke pathetically requests the fact may not be made public—for fear ol domestic complications. But generous is Pyke. He would not monopolise so much sweetness, and so the buds were distributed among our legislators.

'Twas a touching, a poetical, a beautiful fancy that these pure creatures should come, so to speak, decked for the sacrificial sessional altar with such emblems of love, tenderness, beauty, and chastity. Mr Pyke, by the way, is to move the address-in-Heply, and has promised-to make the occasion the oratorical event of his life. Potatoes.

From Pykc to potatoes is a terrible descent, but at a time when farmers and agriculturists find it so difficult a task to make two ends meet, there is no harm iu mentioning the following simple fact: I have recently had given me a sack of potatoes grown in the Kangitikei district. They are cultivated by a farmer who owns but 17 acres of laud and raises potatoes only. The " spuds" are grown without manure and are simply revelations in

the way of their species-smallish, perfect in shape, without spot or blemish, easily cooked, and more delicious in taste than epicure could imagine in wildest dreams. Suffice it to say that the cultivator makes a handsome living out of his seventeen acres, War Scares. New Zealanders are not the only people who suffer alarms concerning' invasion. The English arc just now undergoing one ot their periodical blue funks on this account. If all the stories one hears about England's unpreparedness for war be true, there is really grave cause for fear. England never yet stood on the verge of war but tho pessimists croaked dire forebodings, and the peculiar part of the matter is that the pessimists were and are right, but that the extraordinary luck of Britain lias heretofore brought her through, if not triumphantly, still with moderate success. Good fortune cannot, however, be eternal. Another Conference.

We are threatened with an Australasian conference on the everlasting Chinese question, and no doubt there would be great advantage in such a conference. At tho same time an era in colonial history is rapidly approaching, when a large number of intercolonial matters will have to be adjusted, and many thingu point to the advisability of Australasian federation.

I hope in my next to lntve something of a lively nature to communicate and report upon. The Pope and the Plan ol Campaign, WHAT ARCHBISHOP REDWOOD AND BISHOP LUCK THINK. On the receipt of the first cablegram mentioning the Pope's action re the Homo Rule question, the Auckland Bell, with commendable forethought, sent a reporter to interview the Catholic clergymen in tho city as to their Proceeding to tho residence of Bishop Luck, the reporter had the following conversation, the preliminaries being left out:— Bishop Luck: Your Grace, a representative of the Bell deaires to see you. Archbishop Redwood : About what 1 .Reporter: I presume your Grace and Bishop Luck have both seen the Press Association cablegrams published in the papers stating that the Pope had condemned the Plan of Campaign, and I desire to know what you think of it. Archbishop Redwood: I havo no opinion at all, unless it be that I shall wait to see it confirmed. At present I do not desire to say auyi|ing about it. Ihese things are so often misleading and inaccurate that the wisest course is to suspend one's judgment about them. Reporter: Well, we thought it rather a strange telegram. Archbishop Redwood: So it is. You see it states that the Freeman's Journal draws a distinction between the Plan of Campaign and the League, when tho two are identical. I cannot understand it at all, and, as the cable reads, can make little or nothing of it. It is not wise to pay too much attention to these telegrams, they are so often contradictory. ,'Bishop Luck; That is tho caso with

me, I try to keep myself out of politics altogether,.' I don't like them, and when I read about'them, they,' ns it were, go in atone ear and out at'the other. This one, like His Grace Arch-' bishop Eedwood, I cannot and, so far as lam concerned, dewe to express an.opinion upon it. ' . Reporter: But suppose it is true ? Archbishop Eedwood: But why suppose anything about it ? Why not wait until it is explained ? On tlld face of it, as it reads, I can express no opinion upon it. The teachings of the church ara clear on the point, ft does not interfere with and has nothing to do with political intrigue and politics, and the Holy See will only interfere . in any matter where it trenches upon her province—religion and morals. The church would not uphold an immoral act, and that is only whore slio will interfere. - ... other'ciJSfcfy ' The reporter visited Father (tff St. Patrick's) and had a conversation with him, .Father Hackett said he was not desirous to express an opinion till the telegram was confirmed, and used similar language to that employed by Archbishop Redwood. Father Leniham, of the Church of Sacred Heart, Ponsonby road; was interviewed

: Reporter: Father, what do w\\ think of the cablegram saying the'flpe had condeicned'the Plan of (Jam p.iigii 1 Father Leniham: I cannot believe it. I think there is aij error. If the Plan of Campaign is what I understand . it to be, I cannot see how tho Pope could possibly condemn it. . -- ' .Father Downey, of St. Benedict's in reply to the same query, promptly replied :" I think it's a hoax." : Father Sullivan said: " I think the despatch is garbled." The only solution the latter could offer was that the Pope might have asked or perhaps expressed himself to the effect, some act the league have done unjust, and that bad been seized upon 4 and tortured into a condemnation of the Plan of Campaign. Father O'Sullivan said the instructions sent to the priesthood were clear. They could go on any platform arid take part in.any political agitation tbey chose as a man, but not as a priest.The Holy See had been most careful not to mix up with politics, aud would only interfere where there was ;yjfe'r violation of right, and * been done. The Church claimed jurisdiction of religion and morals only, and did not touch politics.

How an Execution was stopped. A despatch from Eufaula, a town of Alabama, U.S.A., gives the details of how a convicted : murderer there narrowly escaped the gallows afc tho beginning of this month. It appears that on the morning of the expected execution at Georgetown, 6a., twtfL tniles across the river from Eufaula, a' • number of prominent citizens telegraphed to Governor Gordon, asking tor a respite of 20 days, The message was received in. Atlanta at 10.50 o'clock, and Lewis was to.be hanged between 11 and 12 o'clock. At 11 o'clock precisely Governor Gordon read the message, and immediately t&M, to the telegraph office in Atlanta •Mfollowing " Suspend hanging of jMwis Moore for 20 days from this date. J. B. Gordon, Governor. Wire to Eufaula and rush messenger to Georgetown." The message was sent from the Atlanta office at 11,10 to Augusta,by which point messages from Atlanta are usually sent to Eufaula. Tne wire between Augusta and Eufaula was' down. The message was sent buck to Atlanta, and at once sent to Montgomery, where it was received at 11.14 o'clock. The wire between Montgomery and Eufaula was, luckily, all right, and the message was received by Moore at 11.19. It had to be copied aiid undergo the usual routing, of office manipulation, and no messen?r ger was to bo had. Manager Moore took the message, and hurried to a stable, where, fortunately, one solitary horse remained, everything else having been engaged by parties going over to witness the hanging. Ordering tho animal to be saddled at once, Moore, realising the importance of the message and the value of time in covAig the distance, vaulted into ne saddle, and urging the animal to his utmost speed, went away on the wind for a two-mile ride to Georgetown, It was 11.35 o'clock when he mounted bis horse, and Moore was to hang at 12, The execution could not be delayed beyond that hour, On they flew, horse and rider, and just as the condemned man emerged from his long confinement to find, as he thought, freedom in eternity, just as he started to the fallows; the bravo horse and l'ider rose up over tho hill, and theory rang out: " Don't hang him I Don't hang him !" and at 11,45 o'clock, 10 minutes after leaving Eufaula, the message of liberation was placed in the hands of tho Georgia Sheriff, and a life was saved for 20 days at least, — %■ A DIPLOMATIST,

" When 1 was editing a daily snorting paper in this city I.ofteiJfee very near a whipping, but I always managed to escape." " How did you manage it?" enquired the sporting editor's listener. " You are not a very large man nor a very strong one, and you must have met soiaovetty tough customers in that olliceT: " Diplomacy, my boy, diplomacy. Why one day L scared a light-weight prizefighter away, scared him so badly that he never came back either." « How : with a pistol ?" " With nothing but nerve and common sense. I'll tell you how I did it. I was standing in the office one afternoon when the door opened and the prize-fighter came in Ho was one-third bigger than I was! and mad clear through. I had my hat and coat on, fortunately for myself, and looked ;more like a visitor than an editor. He wanted to know the editor's name. I gave him my name." 'Whennel he be iivMe growled. 'I told him in abouTOn minutes ' • Well I'm going to give him the blankest hiding he wever had in his life.' 1 Why?' I asked in surprise. I didn't know who he was at first. 'Oausohe said I was ft chump, and I ilou't allow no ectitoy |,q

call 1110 a .chump. D'ye see?" I politely informed liirn that I had no difficulty in seeing, but at the same '■ time I advised him to beware. Why? is lie much on the fight? 'Bather. I replied. 'Big as I am?' 'Bather,' Ijfeain replied. ' Think he could do wfiip ?' 'Rather,' I repeated. The pugilist seemed nonplussed slightly by this information. He had not bargained for any opposition. Wliilo he was pondering over the matter, Jim Scott, our pressman, stalked into the office, and slowly passed into the composing room, Jim is six feet five inches tall, and about half as wide. He had a heavy swaggering walk, too, and I think he could havo stared an elephant out ol •countenance. Jim didn't say a word.' Ha just walked through, and slammed the door after him, _' Say, tioung feller,' gasped tlio ex-belligerejn&ugilist,. his eyes starting out of Hniead like door-knobs, say, is tbsfthe editor ?' ' Bather,' I responded. ' Well, you can give Mm Bill the Kid's compliments, and say that he can call him a chump whenever he wants to. I know enough not to get mad at a little thing like that. Good-bye.' He never came back."— New York Mail. A Mysterious Burglary. mysterious burglary, which took place lately at Christohuvch in Messrs Beid and Gray's works, lias, although the affair has been kept quiet, excited much speculation, One night the workshop was broken into, and from the office was taken a safe, which was carried out and battered open by sledge hammers which lay about the forges. The rummage of tho safe could not have been very complete, for althougbja cash-box (was found in the yard broken open, strange to say, a sum of money—about £7o—which in the unlocked drawer of the safe, Wild been undisturbed. The cash box had been rifled of £1 or £5, but when the thieves learn that they missed a much larger prize, how they will gnash their teeth! There is, however, every probability that they know all about it by this time, for the affair occurred three weeks ago, and must have been the exploit of some who know the premises and (he occupants well. The lynx-syed reporter appears tdUgve missed this item of news, and foflPFnie reason the particulars havo not been made public otherwise. The Small Bird Nuisance. An enquiry of an extended kind has recently been held in America as to the damage done by birds on fruit orchards and grain crops. It is concluded that hawks and owls do valuable service; crows, blackbirds, and lingpies are disappearing and grubs are reappearing. The English sparrow is set in very mild terms as " not being desirable bird." it has been estimated that the produce of a pair of the latter will amount to 275,000,000,000 in ten years, It is alleged, however, that where English sparrows are few other kinds of birds remain. In some districts, however, the unfortunate sparrow has his friends. He is said to be a destroyer of foul weeds in winter, and (ho lias a down on locusts and grasjftppers, As a matter of fact, the' grasshoppers and caterpillers have clean left the Canterbury district since the sparrow came, only we arc threatened with a very serious nuisance in the small birds, which are more numerous this autumn than ever they have been. One or two gentlemen connected with fanning pursuits have called our attention to this fact, with a hope that united action may be taken during the hard frosts to reduce the numerical strength of the small birds.