How to Kiss.

Wairarapa Daily Times, Volume IX, Issue 2890, 4 May 1888, Page 2

How to Kiss.

Time is a boy connected with this office who mixes the ink for the rollers and does the useful generally, who claims to be able to give points in the art of kissing, The following is the result of his mature experience. Never kiss a girl if &he doesn't want you to, The main ingredient that makes kissing endurable is a willingness on the part of the female. If it deepens into anxiety po muoh the better. When a girl claws a man's hair and scratches bis face like a little fool-drop her at once. She is destitute of good sense and natural affection, and t]ie sooner you begin making lqve to her sister the better, As long as a girl don't claw and yell, and struggle like a panther, it's perfectly safe to continue

prospecting. Get a little behind her» pass the right arm round the waist in front, take her left hand in your left, and if you don't know what to do next go and associate with the boys Pineville, If you are just beginning to teach a shy girl, who has only been kissed heretofore by her brothers and father, touch "your lips gently to her forehead, She will take this for an exhibition of profound respect. That position gained, working the way down 10 the lips is as natural and as easy as the course of log-sliding down the wood flume of the Kentucky Lumber Company.

Never sit down to kis3. It appears awkward in case anybody is looking, and seems awkward anyhow. Stand up, and the closer you press the girl, the higher estimate she wi) 1 ... place on your good taste, and experience. w' Kissing married ladies is a separate mf branch of the art,'and requires con-' stant practice. "Where tenderness and a little hesitation and bashfulness, if well put on, go a Ions; way with a young girl, such nonsense is not , swallowed by a married woman to any considerable extent. Be warm, vigorous and hearty; and above all thumbs frequent. One of the prow requisites on such an occasion is a . quick ear for the light footstep in the hall, and a nice calculation as to how long the husband will take to reach the door after he has passed the : head of tho stairs, A house heavily \ carpeted with Brussels requires eternal vigilance and sometimes rare presence of mind. By the time the worser half of the family gets his hand on the door knob, you must, be seated in the far . corner of the room, seriously perusing Talraage's sermon on Covetousness, A kiss can sometimes be snatched when tho husband is in the room, but ,• this requires an expert, as it is risky, vh ' i Our young man once knew an A married lady asked her husband to wind the clock and a young man in tho room thought he saw a golden opportunity and went for it. If the clock hadn't had a mirror just before the face that young man would have been allright; but for three weeks after, his sunday school class pickod-up teacher, and he had tlieiß pearance of having bucked against a cyclone. This is one of the vicissitudes of kissing from mere impulse,