PARLIAMENTARY SKETCHES BY Our Wellington Watchman.

Wairarapa Daily Times, Volume IX, Issue 2618, 8 June 1887, Page 2

PARLIAMENTARY SKETCHES BY Our Wellington Watchman.

Monday, June G, 2.80 p.m. These, 1 fear, will be very small beer chronicles, That is not, however, my fault for our present Parliament seeing determined to give us nothing but tho smallest of small beer to chronicle. About eight members were present when the .speaker read prayers, which by the way he does very nicely,, after the manner of an Anglican Clergyman but with, apparently, the inevitable warm potatoc in his more than sacred mouth, If this'.senteiice will render me liable to imprisonment, or torture, or death for "Breach of privilege," please do not print it. Something was wrong with the gas overhead, and the Sergeant at Arms and a Messenger gazed upwards so long and earnestly that members apprehensively glanced with them, expecting possibly the arrival of a certain heavenly commotion which all of them, with the exception of Mr Hobbs, are totally unprepared for.

lie first inembov to rise was the ! Premier,, who moved that the orders ' t of the day ho proceeded with, and he moved it meekly. Our Robert is subdued, and wo have not heard for some little time t';oso strident tones we have learned to love so well. Then Mr Peacock p.sked a harmless sounding question, and Major Atkinson enquired whether the debate would he reported in i'.ill, Dargavillo supported the suggestion, " Unfortunately" he was not present on Friday—and someone murmured •'fortunately." Mr Peacock proceeded, The question was "Had the Government any right to enter into the engagements they had, regarding village settlements without the sanction of the House ? Had tke Minister j of lands when he asked for £5,000 or an experiment, the idea in his mind that £70,000' would be expended?" "No," Mr Ballance replied, he had no idea, the thing sorter grow on him. The return on this subject, previously asked for, was not quite ready yet, but it was coming. Sir George Grey —who lately has acquired a habit of looking at Ministers on-, their Benches, shaking

aii austere finger at them, and telling; them thoy should come out of that—enquired if the return would include the names of the officers, such as village stewards &c. Mr Ballanco rather thought the return would not, Mr Fulton, in his sad resigned manner, said all sorts of allegations were flying about regarding the tremendous power John Lundon had over his col-, league, the Minister of Lands. Hodges the political agitator, the fellow who libelled Mr PjKe—had been allowed a free passage in the " Hincmoa" at the instance of Lundon, who usedhis interest with his chum Mr Balance. Then Dargaville undertook to explain the little difficulty in which his friends Ballance, Lundon, Hodges and Co. were placed. Hodges had been the patron-saint of the Auckland publicans, but had resigned that position and was now one of that " holy army of martyrs—a blue-ribbon man," and he was allowed a passage in the " Hinemoa" simply because he was the bearer of an important petition in favor of Women's Suffrage. Thou Mr D. gave us a second edition of Dargavillian drivel touching these village settlements. John Lundon was the saviour who had placed these starving men upon the land, and "no notice should be taken"—this was in reference to some language of Lundon's for which he« is rather celebrated—"of the irresponsible utterances of an unoducated Irishman' 1 (loud and prolonged "hear! hear!") All Lundon had to do was to get hold of these poor laborers and convey them, their families (and "pianners" I suppose) to the settlements. The unemployed cry in Auckland had been quieted by the scheme. Here Dargaville ventured a foreign quotation supposed to he Latin, and apropos to nothing, but simply to demonstrate that his were not the " irresponsible utterances of an uneducated Irish man." The advances made to village settlors were, he declared, well secured. The crown was simply investing its spare capital (?) on undeniablo security at live per cent, and the crown (?) could well afford to do this, as it borrowed at 4 per cent. Many of these (indiijcni) settlers had money in tho Bank. The Auckland climate was remarkably fine—warm in the winter, Little clothing was required, and fish were remarkably plentiful. A man in, these settlements might make a fortune on two acres, As arulohe (Dargaville) was rather given to personalities (hear! hoar!), but he wished —tho beautiful patriot—" this great question considered patriotically," The poor Government had. been kicked (that is Sir Robert's elegant and chaste simile) with hob-nailccl boots, and he hoped hon, members would—would kick it in future with • their stockinged feet. At this, Mr Kerr, scenting a personality, glowered at Dargaville, who sat down, and if Mr Ballance ever prayed, his prayer then was: "Save me from my friends!" I think nothing shows more evidently the straits to which Ministers have been reduced, than their unholy alliance with Mr Dargaville, of Dargaville, who certainly does not carry the political respect of one frequenter of the House,

At this stage there was another demand for the returns, and the Premier replied somewhat disingenuous!]'. Colonel Trimble declared there had boon a deliberate attempt to throw dust in (he eyes of Members; the House hrl been adjourned on Saturday morning, on purpose that information might bo furnished. Where was it? Mr Ilursthouso was glad Mr Dargaville had admitted Irishmen wore not responsible for what they said. He hoped the House would remember that, as that no doubt was the reason Mr Dargaville was so independable and made statements in that House, which lie himself did not believe—and no one else believed. The truth was, the man Hodges had come to Wellington at the instance of the Auckland Eadical Association—his mission, to watch Dargaville. The Minister of Lands had greatly exceeded the authority placed in his hands. If it was right to lend to small farmers under tho scheme, it was right to lend to other farmers, who would gladly borrow at five per cent, instead of 7or 8 per cent. Previous experience in Village Settlements had shewn they were unsuccessful, and he was sure these settlers would never pay one per cent. The Premier was pledged not to borrow, how then did he propose to carry on these settlements ? Mr Buchanan asked a question and Mr Turnbull did a little talking on the Govcrnmentside princi-

pally aimed at Mr Hobbs, He (M: Turnbull) regretted that Christian mei should attack other Christian mor (presumably the Christian Lundon) He thought Lundon the most suitable person for his present office—apparent ly because Mr Lundon was so fond ol the Auckland Climate. Someone onct advertised'for a "useful man wh( feared the Lord and could carry foui hundred." He thought a man with the "practical knowledge of Mr Lundon and the piety of Mr Hobbs would ho invaluable." Mr Sutter considered these speeches were simply wasting time and pressed for an adjournment pending production of the returns' Mr Hobbs thought the remarks which came from Mr Turnbull—who also professed to be a Christian—were highly improper, Then Mr Hobbs again plunged knee deep into his personal and private grievances and among other things we gathered that the settlers had a " planner," dancing, and high jinks every Saturday. The lion member for Auckland City West threatened to cram his (Hobbs 1 ) statement down his throat in the Houso ("hear! hear!" from Dargaville) but lie would find that rather a hard job, He accused the veracious Dargaville of sending a telegram to one of the Auckland papers purporting to be sent by the correspondent of that paper* Mr Taylor (Sydenham) " Sincerely 'oped we should hear no more of the Hairykeno. The lion'gent 'ad mmotrtim (not bad that for Taylor) on the brain."

In Clu'istchurch a mnnberof men "were hiinployecl a levelling sand'ills. Ho would " hash hany gent in this ere. 'house whether thy would be satisfied with that sort of work ?" Honest Mr Taylor of Sydenham, not to perceive that sand-'ills was precisely

-what had occupied those sapient sena- ' tors tho whole afternoon, Mr Taylor appeared—why I know not—to aim his speech at Colonel Trimble, as if it, (the speech), werd a novel description, of Shanghai; or Nihilist bomb which ', ,; ;jnight smite and slay the gallant Colonel, who always looks uncommonly imcomfqrt« able when Mr Taylor is • slaughtering his aspirates, ■■''w'

• Then I went home.' If your readers do not find this sketch' very entertaining I shall be very sorry, but cannot, help it. lieport what happens: and what is mm/, and it is the fault, of electors and my misfortune that menir hers of the House turn the House a bear-garden. ■■■'•fr ->