BAGPIPES.

Wairarapa Daily Times, Volume VII, Issue 2055, 30 July 1885, Page 2

BAGPIPES.

It appears that jt iq all a mietake to assume that' oatmeal 15 the cause of the national Scotch dyspepsia. T{ie national interpretation of fclje fact* Scotch eat oatmeal ana suffer from dyspepsia is, that oatmeal produces dyspepsia, When the "Times' 1 expressed this opinion it did so in perfect good faith, but now that a real Scotchman, who is an expert it} dyspepsia, not only denies that oatmeal is indigestible, but explain! in a perfectly satisfactory way the true cause of Scotclr dyspepsia, it would be dishonest not to proclaim the innocence of oatmeal. Dyspepsia among Scotchmen the result of listening fa tip and the moment this assertion is mude, its truth becomes self-evident. It may be urged by ignorant persons that the impression of a sound rocoivod on the tympanum of the ear cannot affect tho stomach. This is, of course, flntirely untrue. It in a well fact that certain songs will produce nausea on the part of sensitive hoarers. Excursionists on their way to' Rockaway by sea have often been made violently sick by hearing the steamer's band play " Whoa, Emma," and a physician of thiuity has frequently prescribed " P ( iics j(ii" as an emetia iii or(ae of poisoning,' It is a Vell-attes'ted fidt' that the bagpipes', when'heard by persons who aro not accustomed to them, give ris'g to violent griping' pains in the stomach, which closely resemblq thft paity pjf- Asiatic cholei'<|. Ejuring §bp:oy the Scotch f.egjin6nta'inor.e than once placed large' bodies of Sepoys hoy it mn\bat by tho use pf the bagpipes alone. Had not Havelopk's hftle ariny iwjis!(j * »h»ng corps of pipers, jt could never have made its way into Lncknow through the vast besieging force, • Mr • Whittier speaks of the pipos at Euoknow as "stinging all the plain to life." Tho Sepoys would hardly have described in that way the effect of pipe-playing. As a matter of fact, thousands of the rebels, as soon as they heard the bagpipes,, clasped their hands to their abdominal regions and rolled on the plain in agony. Even those whose stomachs withstood the sound, imagined that the Sepoy camp had suddenly been smitten with cholera, and become thatl]!atfolo(jk forced life way through the midst' oYfcfiem 'alriiost' unmolested, and reached theresidency without other casualtifes than the death of' two wounded Englishmen, who were officially reported to have died' with joy at seeing the relieving fqrqe, but wl}q were r«% tap weak to withstand the bagpipes. Scottish children tuffejf severely from the bagpipe colic, and nq careful mother will allow a baby in arms tq hear the pipop, When the Scotch (Mdrsii reaoh the age of throe or foiir years, they are gradually hardened to the sound of the bagpipes, and though 1 at first they are fairly doubled up with .pain—for which whisky se#m6 to be the only antidotesthey aire able in • time to-' l'jsisn tq '* The: WildM'Qregqr Glan ; eill" without betray, ing any.sigMoJuneasinejs. ; T]ieb'agpipe: eoße is never fatal except to infants' and -persons in a "very weak coadifciou, and Scotch physioians occasionallyprewribe a course of pipes to persons suffering from obesity. Her Majesty th» Queen has tried this remedy with apparently good results, though it is diffioult to beßevo that its permanent effect upon her health can be beneficial. No man, not even »' Scotchman, oan suffer for years from colic without hiving

his digestive organs impaired. When B young Scotchmati. ha|; ;bii, stomach'to bear bagpipe* without pain, it; may be safely assumed is so weakened as-to be •totally t<>> digest ordinary food, lii' these circurastances it is possible that oatuieal ii well adapted to the abnormal state tif, his: digestive organs. At-any rate, oatmeal . can no longer be lield to be the cause of : Scotch dyspepsia, • and there is ' good ': reason to believe that Carlyle. owed, his ', dyspepsia to his early exposure to ibagr,., pipes.—New York Times. : ,