KILL THAT SOW!

Wairarapa Daily Times, Volume 6, Issue 1647, 29 March 1884, Page 4

KILL THAT SOW!

This story is told of one of llie resident of Weatherlield, mid it is vouched for as true in every particular, Perhaps it might be a little too personal to give his veal name, so for the purpose of our sketch wo will call him Doctor, Ono day the Doctor's pocket-book was missing, and with it ,£SOO in bunk notes, If an electric battery had poured a broadside down liis spinal column ho could have scarcely felt a greater shock, His hands flew from pocket to pocket, his face lengthened sorrowfully. Ho lost his mental equilibrium, and was dancing round on the ragged edge of despair, Finally ho bethought himself of a visit he had paid that morning to Bill Wells's, Tlic Doctor reasoned that his pocketbook was in the pen, against which he leaned. He assumed that it would be un easy matter for it to drop out of his pocket with his body thrown forward, as ho remembered it liiul been. It was think-and-go with him, lie clambered into his trap, and headed his steed towards Bill Wells's house, He only thougltof that well-stuffed pocket-book at the bottom of the hog-pen, and in his mind he saw that big old sow, as it grunted with satisfaction while poking his pocket-book and bank-notes about. On reaching his destination he rushed to the pen, expecting to find the wreck of bis pocket-book, but he was disappointed. Not a sign was there! "The old sow has swallowed it whole," muttered the Doctor. Then Mr Wells appeared on the scene, and the Doctor cried out, "What will you take for that sow 1" " I don't know as I want to sell it," replied Mr Wells. " You must sell it, Set your own price but I must have that sow," " But I don't want to sell it." " And 1 say you must; I'll give you your own price for it." " Well, then, say £15," thinking the price would cool the Doctor, and he was astonished at the reply: "111 take it. Now, kill that sow, I tell you she has swallowed my pocketbook, with £SOO in it, and if you don't hurry up, and have her killed, she'll digest it, and I'll lose every shilling." He then rammed his hands into his pockets with such force that lie discovered a hole in one cf them, and as lie dived deeper down lie felt .something—the perspiration ran down his face, us ho cried "Here it is 1" and be then drew forth the lost pocketbook, He then gave Wells a pound and told him to keep his pig.