Notes and Comments.

Waimate Daily Advertiser, Volume III, Issue 139, 10 December 1901, Page 3

Notes and Comments.

“ Colonel ” Lynch, the newlyreturned member for galway’s Galway in the House of EiipaESEN- Commons, and who ATivE. was dared to take his seat therein, is having a fairly lively time at present. Just now he is occupied in denying that he is a dynamiter and adventurer, although admitting ihat he played the part of an enemy to Great Britain in South Africa. A correspondent of the Pall Mall Gazelle wrote in October : In th« united Irishman, the organ of the Mcßride Nationalists, appears the official notification or one of the leading Fenian organisations, tint Mr Arthur Lynch had no claims to the title oi Irish Nationalist at all, and further enquiries liava elicited tho fact that the “ Colonel's ” colonelcy is wholly unrecognised by dho real Irish Boers. Mr Lynch, it is explained, went out to the Transvaal for three or four months as the correspondent of the Paris paper, Le Journal, and after that brief period suddenly descended on the Boulevard with the title of colonel, with a wondrous story of having organised an Irish regiment, and with a smart khaki suit, more like a Yeomanry ofiicer’s than any known Boer typo, in which ho hastened to get himself photographed for reproduction in tbs illustrated Press. All this excited great mirth in the cafes when; the Pads brethren of tho pea most do congn-gate, and enquiries from the redoubtable Major Mcßride failing to evoke information of the second “Irish Regiment,” the “Colonel” found it convenient to visit the United States in the character of another Lafayette or Soul h African Washington. New York proved as sceptical as Paris, and, while the Fenians organised a triumphal tour for Major Mcßride from the Bowery to San Francisco, the mythical “Colonel” returned, sad and indignant, to tho Flench capital. It was in these depressing circumstances that Mr Lynch turned to Mr Redmond’s party. England is Icng-suilMring, and permits much treason —although purchance made under the guise of fair criticism —in her high places, but the “ Colonel’s ” desire

to sit ;ia h law maker against those whom ha so lately fought and soiioiuod is too too much. Ho should be thrown out with a ;.h'ul that could he heard throughout the British Empire.

Max o’R.ell, in his book on Woman, declares that KEH roy 4 l woman is the only muu.suss, problem that will woman. never be given to man to solve. All men have tried it, and. all have failed, but though they acknowledge this they are trying still. Woman baa always bean a great power from the time of the Garden of Eden to the year of grace 1901. “ Ever since Adam and Eve there have been men and women—especially women.” Max O’Rell gives some advice to the man in love, which might be found useful even by Waimate young men, who are known as past masters in the art of wooing. “ Never go down on your knees to declare your love : you will spoil your trousers and feel very uncomfortable. Rather give the lady an opportunity of denying that you were on your knees before her, for the simple reason that she was sitting on them.” “ Never put your hand near your lady’s waistband or round her neck. Place it about the middle of her back ; there are no pins there.” We have not space for the numbers of other valuable hints given. “ When you are dead it’s for a long time; when you’ve married it’s for ever ; therefore spend a long time in choosing your partner.” As regards the age to marry at, ho advises a man to marry a woman half his own age plus seven. “ Marriage is a lottery; go in for it at once and take your chance.” “ The beginning of wisdom is to keep your wife in order.’ - “You have to keep the fire of love alight for the length of your life; sea that your cellar is wall stocked and the fuel is used economically.” “The best thing that can happen to a man is to bo ruled by his wife.” “ You cannot help falling in love any more than you can help becoming gray or bald.” “ Women who seldom miss an opportunity of picking one another to pieces, stand shoulder to shoulder (as much as the shape of their sleeves will allow them to do) wben the question to decide is whether it is a man or a woman who is in the wrong.” “Many a woman would have been in despair if Nature had made her as fashion has often made her appear.” “The majority of us men are conceited enough to think that women dress and try to look beautiful to please us. My firm conviction is that women dress to please themselves — or to kill other women with envy.” Trench women are the best dressed women in the world according to Max O’Rell, the

American ■woman coming next. The latter, according to this - authority, “ generally looks dressed for conquest. With her it is paint and feathers and hooray all the time.” “If the end of the world were to witness the presence of two women only on the face of the earth, each would be discovered striving to outshine the other and look the better dressed of the two.” Max O’Kell has a good opinion of the American woman, and declares that if he had to be born again he would shriek to his Creator, “ Oh, make me an American woman.” We have given enough examples to show the style of thing the writer produces, but cannot refrain from adding two more : “ However ill you may speak or think of women, you will always find a woman able to do it hotter than you.” “ The j most religious woman will postpone an interview with her Maker for an appointment with her dressmaker.”