SPECTATORS AT FIRES.

Tuapeka Times, Volume VI, Issue 271, 10 April 1873, Page 3

SPECTATORS AT FIRES.

A witty correspondent of the Canterbury "Press" writes:— The general public rather like to go to a fire. I don't know why, but I know lots of steady-going citizens who will, at the' sound of the fire-bell, arise in the dead of night, and run two or three miles on the chance of seeing even a small conflagration. If such folk would confine themselves to being simply spectators, it would be no matter to anyone, but they will insist on being of use when there are perhaps hundreds of fire-devouring Richards in the field already. In their endeavors to learn the origin of the fire — to get a good sight of it, or save goods— they get in the way, and make the lives of the firemen and police a burden to them for the time being. The attempts at salvage made by some of these beings are sometimes superlatively idiotic. I saw one swivel-headed chunk the other night throwing crockery into the street to save it y and crying out wildly to others who were working, "Keep cool for goodness sake, keep cool." I could have incremated that fellow with delight and danced a breakdown all the time. I have one invariable plan at a fire. I sit down in the glare and cry. Someone thinks I'm suffering, and takes me away to drink. The overzeal of some people might be cured bj a little judicious reporting. After giving the usual particulars of the fire and voting the thanks of the community to the Brigade and Police (which to speak truth they usually well deserve), your reporters might add a few words of praise such as the following; — "We observed Mr Kabtacle getting in everybody's way, acting like a drivelling idiot." "Mr. A. S.S. Siduous, by his unceasing fbut utterly insane exertions, increased the loss to the N.Z. Insurance Company by about LBO. "We hope he will eschew fires for the future." "At one stage of the proceedings the curiosity of seven larrikins became of such a character as to induce Mr Superintendent Harris to order them to be squirted on. This order was obeyed with most effective results."