THE LAWRENCE MUSHROOM CLUB.

Tuapeka Times, Volume III, Issue 215, 14 March 1872, Page 6

THE LAWRENCE MUSHROOM CLUB.

(To tlie Editor.)

Sir, — A. society the existence of which, you will agree with me, is not sufficiently know, was some time ago inaugurated in Lawrence, bearing the somewhat guphonious title of the Mushroom Club. Believing that if the objects of this society were more widely known its roll of members would be considerably augmented, I think it not out of place to point out a lew of the many advantages which accrue to a person on becoming an M.L.M.C. (Member of the Lawrence Mushroom Club).

The advancement of temperance being the primary aim and object of the Club, it is made imperative on the members to drink nothing but catsup, a good supply of which is always kept on band for their ■ use. To keep up this supply, a certain number of members arc told off to prospect for mushrooms morning and evening during the season. These are taken to the society's distillery, where. they are converted into that veritable nectar, catsup, which even -now is fast becoming a popular drink;

The healthful, invigorating exercise of roaming over the hills at early dawn, through tho beaded grass ; to enjoy the novel and pleasing sensation of the cool, refreshing dew of heaven penetrating one's nether garments,^ rolling and frollicking down one's legs, and playfully nipping one's pedal extremeties, are of themselves sufficient inducements, to any one not cursed with -a grovelling mind, to become an M.L.M.C- But this is not all : there are many advantages and privileges enjoyed by the members of the Club, which, however, are not made known to the uninitiated. This much I may say : that on the night on which I became a member, after going through the impressive initiatory ceremony, such was the elevating effect, that I wondered into what terrestrial paradise I had been admitted, until I found myself affectionately embracing a policeman in Peel-atreet", and endeavouring to persuade him to stick to tempei*ance and catsup, a draught of which latter I offered him out of my flask. He, however, respectfully declined, but induced me to go and spend the night af his residence. He was very kind ; he gave me a whole brick house to myself. In conclusion, I would invite all those who are favourable to the cause of temperanco and peace — and those who are not — to join the Mushroom Club and take to catsup. — I am, &c, Twinkle, Junk., M.L.M.C. LawrEnce, 12th March.