LADIES' COLUMN.

Tuapeka Times, Volume III, Issue 112, 31 March 1870, Page 7

LADIES' COLUMN.

A rich old man, who lives near Rio Janeiro, is said to keep a large anacondo on his premises to frighten off ladies and missionaries, who are constantly soliciting donations for chartiable and religious purposes in that city.

The wooden woman is never troubled, and never suffers herself to be put out of the way. By a sick-bed, however deadly, she sees no danger, up to the very last. Every one will recover according to her diagnosis; not because she is hopeful by temperament, and one of those sanguine people who cannot be taught to take gloomy views about anything, but because she has none of that tenderness which of itself creates fear and despondency. She has no fear because she had no imagination. — " Queen." Let each one strive with all his might To be a decent man, And love his neighbour as himself — Upon the golden plan ; And if his neighbour chance to be A pretty female woman, Why, love her all the more — you see

That's only acting human. The following is a verbatim report of a conversation between two American young ladies who have just finished their education at a classical school : — " Were you at the pic-nic ?" " Yes, and we had a high old time of it." " I wanted to go so bad, but mother was so hard-pushed I couldn't get oft." " I was quite rigged, but I couldn't corner you anywhere in the woods. We had a bully time ; and you know I promised my gallant that he should have a sight at you." " Well, I'm sorry ; but you bet I'll put in my big licks at the fair."

She was young, she was pretty, she was plump, she was fair. She was not in the least embarrassed by her prominent position. She was dressed in the height of fashion. A hat, like a cheese-plate, was tilted over her forehead. A ballon of light brown hair soared, fully inflated, from the crown of her head. A cateract of beads poured over her bosom. A pair of cockchafers in enamel (frightfully like the originals) hung at her ears. Her scanty skirts shone splendid with the blue of heaven. Her ankles twinkled in striped stockings. Her shoes were of the sort called "Watteau." And her heels were of the height at which men shudder, and ask .themselves (in. contemplating an otherwise lovable woman), " Can this charming person straighten her knees ? "—"" — " Man and Wife," by Wilkie Collins, in " Cassell's Magazine." 1 wish the women who set the fashions would visit the prison of St. Pelagic: then they would see how those false chignons are manufactured which they impudently hang over their nape, or suffer to float over their shoulders. One workshop is devoted to this branch, which is learnt in a very short apprenticeship- All the hair purchased off doubtful heads, picked up here, there, and everywhere, collected from the comb, or thrown into the street, and caught by the chiffonier's hook, is sorted in shades, divided according to its length, and, after a cleansing process which does not make it much nicer, it it sent to St. Pelagic, where prisoners pass their days in fixing it on silken threads. Thence, when it has been arranged according to the rules of art, it finds its way to the Faubourg St. Grermain. — Paris Letter.

The "Daily Telegraph" has been publishing letters on the subject of waltzing ; and the writers of the letters have been endeavouring, without success, to explain the difference between the waltz a trois temps and the waltz a deux temps. The disputants would have more chance of coming to an understanding, or to a determinable misunderstanding, if they would first of all clear their minds of the delusion that such a thing as a waltz a, deux temps can exist. r A waltz called a deux temps exists, but the designation is incorrect. All waltzes, from the nature of music, must be a troia temps, as all galops, from the nature of the music, must be a deux temps. Valsc a deux temps is simply a misnomer for valse a deux pas. In proclaiming this great truth, we have not ©nly reason but Cellarius on our side. That eminent professor, in his work on the history of dancing, pro tests vehemently against the appellation given to the particular form of waltz derived from the galop, which he claims to have invented ; and which, if its dual character was to be insisted upon at all, ought, he justly remarks, to have been called valse a deux pas. The question is not very important, but it is surely better to be frivolous and exact than frivolous and inexact.

A Providence woman eloped a few days since and went to Hartford. Her companion obtained work in that city, and the couple got along very smoothly until one day when in popped her husband. There was no scene. He merely wanted to know if she was willing to fly to his arms and be forgiven. The other man urged the woman to "do it," whereupon the husband seized him by the hand, and, with tears in his eyes, exclaimed, " This is too much ! " The woman hesitated,, and said she would think the matter over. She then called on the Chief of Police, and, after telling him the story, ask-ed his advice. The Chief having no advice to give, "the woman returned t© her residence, and told her husband that she "hadn't make up her mind yet." " At last accounts, the husband was still at Hartford, awaiting a decision on the matter*