ORIGINAL TALE.

Tuapeka Times, Volume II, Issue 55, 27 February 1869, Page 6

ORIGINAL TALE.

q-^ ONLY A SCEEW. " Don't bid for that 'ere hanimal," whispered some one in my ear. I was standing in Aldridge's horse bazaar, and was just about to offer for a handsome bay mare, which seemed wellsuited, from its quiet appearance, for the invalid lady who had commissioned me to purchase a park hack for her. I turned round, and saw a strangelooking character. He wore an old red coat, which in better days had adorned the person of some master of hounds. His legs were encased in tattered breeches, a Avorld too wide for his shrunk shanks ; and a vary seedy white hat was slouched over a countenance which, in spite of tho ravages of drink, showed traces of shrewdness and good nature. " Why not, my man ? " said. " 'Cos it's Bill Moss's Battling Meg that llarey hisself couldn't tame." " Tell that to the marines," I said ; " I have tried her, and she is quicfe as a three-month lamb." " Small thanks for that, yen oho swallorcd a pint o' loderum this blessed mornin', as ever was," said my nevr acquaintance. " Wait a bit, my good fellow," said I; "and it' what you say is true. I shall reward you for the information." I accordingly jumped into a cab, and drove to a sporting pub close at hand, the proprietor of which v:i\a under some trifling obligation to me. I easily persuaded him to return with mo to Aldridge's, where he at once recognised my fancy as one of the most incorrigibly vicious animals that ever was foaled. I thanked the strange character who had given me such timely warning — giving him a portrait of her Majesty in gold by way of more substantial acknowledgment ; at the same time I expressed my intention never to seek a horse at the bazaar again. "Ah," said my strange friend, " you're right ; co 3 vy, you ain't up to the ropes; but I vones made three thousand quid by a bid in this very place." . _ . Tiiis remark excited my curiosity ; and adjourning' to a quiet tavern, I listsned to the following talc, told in the strange jargon which is the current language of the stable. As some of my readers may not be thoroughly posted in this patois, I have translated it into the language of evcry-day life. "My name is Joe Billot," said he ; and I may say I was raised in a stable. My first money was earned by holding horses in the street; and very proud was I when I was raised to the rank of stable-boy. In due course I was engaged in a large training-stable., and there I was lucky enough to get a straight tip for the Derby. I invented all my savings, and after the great race found myself possessed of £1-50. lat once started for London in order to spend my money ; and happening to pas 3 the bazaar, where a sale was going on, I strolled in, hoping to encounter some friends with whom I could make a night of it. A regular rum-looking screw was being trotted round when I entered; but my experienced eye detected breeding, in spite of the brute's woo-begone condition. It was dead lame, and altogether looked more fit for the knacker than anything obs. "Still, I thought it worth while speculating a fiv^er in its purchase, hoping to couper it up well enough to sell agdia at a profit. Amid. shouts of laujfirer I took away my purchase, stabling him with a friend of mine who kspt a sporting-house some ten miles out oi' London. Grood care, anil plentiful feeding, soon improved the condition of my bargain, although he remained a picture of ugliness, and the lameness, although decreased, was quite peresptible. A few trials conviur-ed me I had made a lucky hit, as the ' miserable brute ' proved a regular flyer, and as pretty a jumper as a man ever mounted. I took, my friend fio publican into my confidence, and wo resolved to enter the nag for the county steeple-chass, which was to coma off in aboub six_ weeks On the day for nomination, we harnessed him to the most miserable dogcart we coaid lay hands on/and I, in s'mbby dress, drove my confederate to the market town. He gammoned to bo fearfully tight, and was unmercifully chaffed for his disreputable turn-out. For a time he appeared to take this iv good part; but after hs had entered a horse of his own, which had considerable looal fame, he apparently lost his temper. ' A scraw. is it ! ' he cried in a passionate tone, hiccupping at every word; " none of you have got such a piece of horse-fissh in your stables, I tell you." 'Hurrah for Mr. Smith's racer! ' cried som.3 of those present ; ' why don't you enter him at once, old follow.' ' And so I shall,' said he ; and staggering up to the stewards he nominated ' Mr. Smith's br.g Tiie Screw (aged) ' for the Loamshire Steeple-Chase. Every ons took this for a piece of drunken bravado, and although many of tioss present were ' gentlemen ' of rank and fortune, they all seamed anxious to profit by his folly, by offering to lay heavy odds agaidst bis last nomination. Hb took every one, and in a short time stood to win £,6000 on- my bargain. Next day ws commenced training, and found tho old cripple took to" his work kindly, and improved rapidly. In. order to keep up the joke, Smith expressed great regret at his folly, and made overtures for repurchasing his bets; but these were of course declined, and he, in a

state of apparent frenzy, declared that at any rate he would have a run for his money. The only two horses we were much afraid of were a black mare belonging to Lord Button, called Diamond, and a bay gelding owned by a farmer, which waa a maiden, and held the potfc of "honour in the betting Still, we felt protty confident, and ii. order to make assur-anee doubly sure laid on a little in the way of place beta. The eventful day arrived/ and seven of the entries faced the starter. I rode The .Screw, w r ho looked well worthy of his name. At last we were off, I taking a po&ition at the tail of till the others; and in aiW minutes were at the first jump,. «, pretty stiff rail fence. Two refused this, and I scrambled over in a manner which excited general laughter. Still, some anxiety was displayed when, after all tho jumps were gone over except one, the bay appeawl leading, Diamond next, and The Screw about three lengths behind, Tho last jump waa a strong post and rail fence with a broad ditch oi\ the other side — a regular rasper. The bay went at ifc gallantly, but struck the timber and rolled over, giving its rider a regular buster ; the Diamond. was close up, and baulked, fvuel The Screw, with a bound, clearing the jump, took the lead. Tho rest of the race was a flat meadow, aboub a quarter of a mile long, r.nd I had at loasG two hundred yards of a start before the mare negotiated the fence. Sbo came with a rush, and rapidly diminished the distance, as I had no desire to win except by r.ll apparent iluko. Keeping about a lengt'i ahead, Tho Screw raced home, landing the stakes — Diamond a good second, and all the rest nowhere. The scene that followed doiies description, the gene-rally-expressed opinion being that our winning was a piece of extraordinary luck. Wo knew better ; and on settling-day I was owner of £3,000. Smith made a match against Diamond for :G 1,000; but I was too anxious to spend my winnings to remain any longer in tho country, so selling my share in the nag for £500, 1 came up to town, where i soon managed to reduce myself to my present condition. Smith won a good deal of monsy with my bargain, and finally disposed of him for a large sum ; and I must say he has always proved a good friend to mo."

I thanked Billet for his narrative, and left him, pondering on this strange example of how for tunss" arc won and lost.