FACETIÆ.

Tuapeka Times, Volume I, Issue 48, 9 January 1869, Page 6

FA CETIÆ.

A basMul young man escorted an bashful young kdy^ As they Approached tip dwelling of "the damsel, *V«he daid] ' entreatrngly, " Jehaal, "don't 'iell anyone you beau'd me .home." ."Sally," said he, emphatically, "don't yon niind, I'm as miich ashamed of it as yon ope.'? -- • •" '•.•"•' An American editor thus advertises his jnissing.hat — "The gentleman who mad- ! .vertentiy took our new beaver, and left an inferior article in its stead,- will drf us infinite kindness .by returning ours, and lie shall receive our -warmest- thanks and 'two apologies ; an apology for the trouble we have given Mm, and the apology for a liatheleftus."

THE PABIS OHIEjF O? POLICE OUTWITIEJ?. Some years ago the contraband trade in > c .wiss watches was carried to such an ex- ■ pass that the Paris, Chief of Police cont idered himself -called upon to' bake a "p-eat ' exertion 1 , to seek to punisK the pftenders-Mvith " ihia iview, he repaired incog: to Geneva. He then applied to a celebrated dealer- in patches, to sell him pne hundred of the finest quality ; when the price was agreed npon,' the chief disjslp.sed" the 'condition that they must be ileiivered in Paris, to which the watchVlealer readily assented, upon an additional mim being added, for risk of transport. „. " iFh'S cfiief gaveafeignea-name andadfl'as settled tliat within a r^V^Tr*** w^d be inthe French capital. the chief 'gave notice 'to the French ~ officers on^he frontiers of these facts ; and. aftei 'exciting their vigilance by everything /.hat was calculated to act upon their fear, Jtheir pride, lor patriotism, he- watched! /tot without anxiety, the event of hit mission;-" •" ■• . _ ' • • Within the time limited, a sirangej called at the street and number which th< chief had given - inquired for him by hii feigned- name', and upon seeing him signi ->^cd ' his readiness to deliver th£ r oni lahdred watches agreeably to contract ' pwun^^^-taken «to custody, wa Tint +o Mmv? ated ' and '^^d-S^liver. the^?f?S er ' l^^ok for a stip^^d P rice - Tjlj&!olfnemoi bed^ enr^C'wentVjFJ^ morti the' vSmaSefS^K ?*!?&&* fcloVe the meS heh^t^^ i W^* over ta^ftS^hTl* 0 pass tl vitfi only a smS, S? ' he was »»< Jbetter success • finairt T' i^*- Wltn n feota the bosom *&fe £?? # *° often thousand fraCprovldeJ^*^- te; guaranteed toS mn t f^- m °f eover ' h disagreeabj^ co^^ 1 allth Ch other grt-ga meditatd 'i fl?^ T^* but toyself -SS' andJ denied » the ordinary waT^l?^^ 16 your own «e4anv 4,d' S^ 01 ** b wbea over th^frootier^tart^^ tljeln *Wge j which, « Tuc^S L 7 ° Ur )Own Wu^tion, I foresaTS^ yy ° Ur pubammstion/' > : ? T T uld esca Pc ex- , Geneva nn-t if, ;t » for he learat that m well frkß&mi!** « P ts and