SCRAPS FROM OUR NOTEBOOK.

Tuapeka Times, Volume I, Issue 36, 17 October 1868, Page 5

SCRAPS FROM OUR NOTEBOOK.

NO. IV.— " GETTING UP." .. That man is ingenious in the art of self-torture no one can deny. The villain who invented lobster salad, and hindered its use by the terrors of a nightmare, was, we must admit, some pumpkins in his way. But to what coal-pit depth of infamy should we not plunge the inventor of getting up? Why on earth is it that parents will persist in misleading the rising generations with such vile proverbs as — Early to bed and early to rise Is the way to be healthy, wealthy and wiie, where the last line should read — Is the way to be stupid and have ugly red eyes, or by quoting the example of the early bird, quite ignoring the fearful warnI ing of the still more early worm ? | Frown on, ye moral folks ; shall there ! be no more cakes and ale because ye are virtuous. Aye, marry, and ginger j will be hot i'the mouth. Between the j blankets, then, let me spend my morn- j ings, while the early rising sun sucks up the fog and damp miasma of the earth. Let me enjoy that greatest of \ human luxuries — breakfast in bed, and I care not for the legions of the unco quid. In a state of drowsy dreaminess let me build lofty castles in the air, for cruel fortune forbids me to hope for more real edifices. Let me dress lazily when the warmth of midday makes the change of temperature unfelt by the protruded leg, and as I dress skim over the columns of the morning paper. Then I shall sally forth, not fagged and wearied, sleepy i and ill-natured, like my early-rising neighbours, but fresh and vigorous, and in perfect good humour with all the world. The difficulties which restrain them are imperceptible to me ; the trifles which drive them half crazy never ruffle my composure. Growling, and utterly wretched, they retire to their dens when the silence of evening affords the best opportunity for meditation — the chosen hour of the scholar, philosopher, and poet. That Justice Shallow when with gay young Jack Falstaff he heard the chimes sound at midnight, was altogether a pleasanter and a better fellow than the dull country magistrate, devoted to early rising and the cultivation of medlars who will be bold enough to deny. Life is too short to be made miserable. Dum vivimus vlvamus. " The present moment is our am, The neist we never saw." And if I choose to spend the present moment between the blankets, what matters it, ye long-jowled canter of respectability ? I, like the most puis- j sant of knights, would fain be a worship- i per of Diana, a minion of the moon. Let not the gavish eye of the sun be glaring down on me for ever. The witching hour of night, for all its ghostly terrors, is dearer to me than the dust and turmoil of mid-day. Then leave me to slumber 1 away my mornings. If any of you, i too, readers, are late slumberers, I give you greeting. If it is late ere we get up, it is at any rate early (in. the morning) when we retire to bed. j