THE SHINDY AT ST. THOMAS.

Observer, Volume 3, Issue 77, 4 March 1882, Page 387

THE SHINDY AT ST. THOMAS.

Ye friends of rnodlieration, Who look with yineration On Christian resignation, and love the golden rule :

Ye pattherns of insthruction, Who reprobate obsthruction, Just listen to the ruction at St. Thomas' Skule.

One peaceful Sunday morning, Widout a word of warning, All ciremony scorning, or any set forinule, Two viathrymen so bold Diacinded oil the fold, And turned thini in the cold from St. Thomas* Skule.

Brave Cornish tuk his station, Wid tundhering proclamation, Against the disecration, so sudden and so cruel ; He didn't ethop or palther — Widout a pause or i" alther He stuck it on the alfcher of St. Thomas' Skule.

The evicted congregation, In grief and thribulation, Convaynod a conshultation, for to discuss the rule, Whin Doonin and bould Howderi Said none would be allowed in, Whin they began to crowd in to St. Thomas 1 Skule.

Says Doonin, " If yez plaze Deliver up the kays, And quietly go yer ways, and don't; yez play the fool ;

If yez don't the game relinquish, The gas I will extinguish, And lave yez all in darkness, in St; Thomas 1 Skule."

Then tlie rain in torrents fell, as A crowd of uniberellas Came trooping in, as well as some colleens, too, me jewel ; And beeyutiful Miss Gibbons, Wid Heathers and wid ribbons, Came in to see the skrinunage in St. Thomas* Skule.

Then Doonin started wigging The people for their jigging, And the congregation bringing into jin'ral ridicule, When Olive, darkly frowning, His homily soon dhrowning, He nimbly tuk the flure in St. Thomas' Skule. Wid eyes like coals of fire, Says he, "The skunk's a liar ! (I as your pardon, ladies, but it's thrue for me, begob) . That blagiard us traducing, I would be introjucing, If I knew the ugly spalpeen, his tailor to me snobj" Thin up got Misther .Cornish, His face was looking warmish : UayHijo; ""''"Too" Tons' we've born this thratement hard and cruel ; Bcgobs, that organ -grinding Is the only thing you're minding, But — ahem— condimn the parson of St. Thomas ....Skule.'? Says Howden, " That's improper !" Says Olive, " That's a whopper 1 I hear it every Sunday, and oflind against no rule ; Yez only want to collar The bright, almighty dollar, Since we lost that sainted Hazard from St. Thomas' Skule. " There's Tebbs, whiniver did ho Cut firewood for a widdy ?" Says Hamilton, " Get out wid ye, yo omadhawn and fool I Why, Tebbs and ye spidogues Isn't fit to black the brogues Of the Hiverind Misther Hazard, of St. Thomas' Skule !" Thin Makune tuk the chair, To see the foight was fail 1 , And appayled to Misther Howden, the legality to rule. Says Howden, " Your offince is, And I rule this conf erince is, Come here on false jjretinees, in St. Thomas' Skule." Then a form was seen to rear, Amidst signs of doubt and fear, As the dreaded spinster Gibbons towered grandly from her stool j And her gingham umbereller Shook in front of Howden's smeller, Like a bould faymale Parneller, in St. Thomas' Skule. Says she, "Bedad, me gint, Me you do not represint (Says Howden, sotto voce, 'Thin I'm moighty glad, me jewel ') ; Aich sisther and aich brother, They ought to love aich other, As the Eiverind Hitchcock told yez in St. Thomas' Skule." Whin Makune, the aigle-eyed, Signs of coming war descried, Says he, "Brave boys, outside is more pleasanter and cool j The turf I recommind ye, It's handy for a shindy, To settle these grave questions of St. Thomas' Skule." But the rain began to patter On the shingles in. a clatter, And the jar of jaw and chatter grew stronger with fresh fuel ; They did not try the yard, But talked about Garrard, And compared him to the wardens of St. Thomas' Skule. Then a lady sweetly smiling, The monotony beguiling, Appayled in gintle accents to Howden for to rule : If she borrowed Doonin's twig, And danced an Irish jig, 'Twould be voted out of ordher in St. Thomas' Skule. They sint a deputation To ax an explanation Why this peaceful congregation had been thrated thus so cruel, And expressed their great anxiety To dwell in love and piety, Like brothers in society, in St. Thomas' Skule. Automated s.