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Thames Star, Volume X, Issue 3437, 30 December 1879, Page 2

The Cambridge Press teils of *n embarrassing situation in which a gentlemanly conductor on a Harrard square car was ' placed the other day. He was collecting I tickets from his passengers, and all handed them over promptly except one fat old lady who sat next the door, and who seemed to be reaching down to get soinethiug she had dropped on the floor. Wheu her turn came, she raised her head, and thus addressed the bktnhing conductor:—"! allnrs, when I travels, carry my money in my stockin', for you &ees nothin' can get at it thar, and I'd thank you, young man; just to reach it to me, as lam so jammed in I can't get at ifc. I forgot to - get my. ticket at the depot." The conductor ' glanced at the other. passengers, some of wfiom were laughing at his plight; one or two ladies among them blushed scarlet, mud he beat a hasty retreat, muttering something abont not charging old ladies. His cash was short that trip the fare of one passenger.

JSTot Polite.—Aunt Bella-^Tow, look here Tommy, suppose there were three apples on the table, could I take one and leave .three? Tommy—Oh, no, aunt* Certainly not. Aunt .Bella—And why. Tommy! Tommy. Because it wouldn't be polite. . >'