MEN'S MINDS AND MANNERS.

Thames Star, Volume VII, Issue 2025, 1 July 1875, Page 2

MEN'S MINDS AND MANNERS.

Sin,—l am not ambitious of following the example of the writer of the article, "Woman's Ways and Wliinis," which appeared in your paper of yesterday, and so make no excuse for .the alliteration of the title which I have given to what I novF write, and which I trust you will allow to appear, if /It ben.bnly on the principle of aiidi alter am partem. The writer of the. article..being, I suppose, one of the class whom Swift had in Tiew when he wrote ;/ " All hir.nan ra io would fain be wits," certainly carries out the idea conveyed in the Dean's next line, that "f'Mlll'.ons inks for one that tits." j But, though he sharpens, as he supposes, that faculty which, in him, stands in the place of wit, he neither gives the cause.of women beiDg as he represents them to be, or suggests any remedy by which, women being so, if so they be, may be induced to become that which by birth they undoubtedly arc— •5 Emblems ami types ol the leal and the true." .Now, sir, allowing women with the " ways and whims ". of the writer's fancy to have an existence in reality, which is allying a great deal, lias the writer erer considered what has induced .her to become that which he represents her to

be ? Has he ever considered that one of woman's chief characteristics hascver been and still is, her utter " forgetfulness of self," absorbed as it were in the longing desire to please, even when that which she seeks to please be utterly unworthy of the slightest effort on her part ? .1 hare no wish to appear in the character which Scott accords to King James, of being champion of the dames ; but following the example of your writer—as in the alliteration of the title, so in this letter-—-will endeavour to draw as he has done some picture of him whom his "wayward, whimsy woman" delighteth. to honour, andithen ask all who. may take the trouble to read ' it, whether my sketch be not at least as ' fair as his, or rather whether, if in the one case there be some things which are unhappily, true—there are not in .thc-.other many which are assuredly truer, your writer seems fond of Tennyson, and if he has not picked up his quotations for the occasion out of some such bo.ok' as -"1001 Gems of Poetry," or other work equally useful for the' shallow mind, he has doubtless read how-■ > woman may be joined to those whose "minds-and manners " are beneath her own, and re- . member the consequence whicfr follows, viz., that-— " ""'" " : " The Rrossness of ,Ms.naL.urc sha!! have weight to d-.r.jtheedowiv." • ,\ : y •: •; ' .ii :'■■■',

Look, sir, at the. manners of young menof the present day, putting aside first the question of mind, which, in the case of some, seems almost conspicuous by its absence. Your writer talks of a "semi-swagger" attached -to -women in their walk, but look at §the " model young mau " as he conies almost rolling in. his best stride down, the street, his hat often on on eside, a pipe more often in his mouth, with two companions similar to himself one on either side impregnating the atmosphere through which the whim of the woman may lead her to! take her way, with tobacco smoke; the conversation of the three kindred spirits loud and noisy, redolent with the last slang phrase or the inane chorus of (gome stupid comic song. Thus they " swagger " aowji the street, taking up tbe middle of;the pavement, and unless they happen to know" the wayfaring woman unlucky enough to meet them,/allowing her to pass them just where she can, needless as to whether she walks through mud or not,, provided sho does not cause them to turn aside; or, if they notice her presence .at ?!1, regarding her with, a sort.,of stare partly inquisitive, wholly impertinent. Their love of self is as manifest by- '.its presence as woman's, is by.its absence. Sir, this is hardly an exaggerated sketch, of what does actually exist and may be seen; and more than this—those who are growing up arc becoming worse imitators of a bad original. The qualities, too, -which represent the mind of the average man seem to be but''on a par with his manners, and one can almost safely say that one half of his conversation, is almost an insult to any girl of average education and abilities to whom, it may -be addressed. Is it to bo wondered at then, if when women in general—seeing tlie •majority of men unable or unwilling ]to -appreciate her natural gifts aright, but manifesting a preference for what is unreal, forced and [' new"—some few of them may bo led by their desire to please to follow those extravagances which your correspondent denominates " ways and whims." First reel, out the cause, and the remedy of tho evil, if evil it bo, will speedily follow. If the man of the da} 7 forms his mind and fashions his manners into what woman can respect and admire, ho will speedily find dial she too will chango herwhims and ways, ami become everything which he can possibly hare a right to expect. . ■ O.P.Q.