FICTION IN BRIEF.

Temuka Leader, Issue 2515, 13 June 1893, Page 4

FICTION IN BRIEF.

MY FARE. ( Concluded.) When I draws up I puts the nosebag on the old horse, for him to amuse himself with, and so as I could leave him, for he wouldn’t stir an inch with that bag on to please all the pleacemen' in London. Then I rings, and waits, and-at last gets my orders to go and help the young lady down. I takes off my hat, wipes my shoes well, and goes up, and there she was waiting, and smiled so pleasantly again, and held out her hand to me, as though I’d been a friend, instead of a rough, weather-battered street cabman. And do you know what I did, as I went inthere, with my eyes all dim at seeing her so, so changed? Why, I felt as if I ought to do it, and I knelt down and took her beautiful white hand in mine, and kissed it, and left a big tear on it; for something seemed to say so plainly that she’d soon be where I hoped my own poor gal was, whom I always say we lost, but my wife says, "No, not lost, for she is ours still." She was so light now that I carried her down in a minute; and when she was in the cab and saw the wilets, she took ’em down, and held ’em in her hand, and nodded and smiled again at me, as though she thanked me for them. " Go the same way as you went first time, Stephen,” she says. And I pushed over all the quieter bits, and took her out beyond Hamstead; and there, in the greenest and prettiest spot I could find, I pulls up, and sits there listening to the soft whispers of her voice, and feeling somehow that it was for the last time. After a bit I goes gently on again, more and more towards the country, where the hedges were turning beautiful and greefl, and all looked so bright and gay. Bimeby I stops again, for there was a pretty view, and you could see miles away. Of course I didn’t look at them if I could help it. for the real secret of people enjoying a ride is being with a driver who seems no more to ’em than the horse—a man, you see, who knows his place. But I couldn’t help just stealing one or two looks at the inside where that poor gal lay back in the corner, looking out at the bright spring-time, and holding them two bunches o’ wilets close to her face. I was walking backwards and forwards then, patting the horse and straightening its harness, when I just catches the old lady’s eye, and saw she looked rather frightened, and she leans over to her daughter and calls her by name quickly; but the poor girl did not move, only stared straight out at the blue sky, and smiled so softly and sweetly. I didn't want no telling what to do, for I jyas in my seat and the old horse flying a'nicst before you could have counted ten ; and away w 6 went, full pace, till I come up to a doctor's, dragged at the bell, and had him up to the cab in no time ; and then he rode on the footboard of the cab, in front of the apron, with the shutters let down; and he whispered to me to drive back softly, and I did.

The old lady has lodged with us ever sirtPCj for I took a better place on purpose, and mV missus always attends on her. She’s werry fond o' talking with my wife about their two gals who have gone before , but though I often take her for a drive over the old spots, she never says a word to me about such things; while soon after the funeral she told Sarah to tell me as the wilets were not taken from the poor gal's hand, same time sending me a fi-pun note to buy a suit o’ mourning. Of course I couldn’t wear that every day, but there was a bit o’ rusty crape on my old shiny hat not such a werry long time ago ; and I never buy wilets now, for as they lie in the baskets in spring-time, sprinkled with the drops of bright water, they seem to have tears upon ’em, and make me feel sad upset, for they start me off thinking about " My Fare.”

TWO PER CENT. DISCOUNT. A train in Arizona was boarded by robbers, who went through the luckless passengers. One of them happened to be a Hebrew drummer" from New York, who, when his turn came, with reluctance fished out £2OO, but radidly took £4 from the pile and placed it in his vest pocket. " What do you mean by that?" asked the robber, as he toyed with his revolver- Hurriedly came the answer : " Mine frent, you surely vould not refuse me two per zent. discount on a strictly cash transaction like dis ?”

...WAS HE SOBER ? „ -Woxicated. He said so himHe was not n , tl office one mo rning, self as he walked 1 „ . head of a pot of and sat down on the drum a p eap blue ink, and then flopped over u, - . of bronze. He offered to multiply q.id by __ to show that he was perfectly sober, and finally one of the crowd proposed that he should walk a chalk line to prove his claim to sobriety, to which he eagerly consented A line was drawn, and he was placed at one end of it, and the referee cried "Go!" but he didn't start. " Well, why don’t you get a move on you ?” asked the boys. He turned a pair of fishy eyes on his tormentors, and inquired with great impressiveness, " Which one of theesh linesh do you fellersh want me to walk ?"

THE WORD PUZZLED HIM. There are many good Scotch anecdotes which will bear telling. One is that of a careful mother, who had a smattering of higher talk gained from association with "the quality." "Ye maun gang to the minister and tell him to come and baptise the bairn, but mind John, that ye dinna say bairn—say infant.” Her better half pondered the word, and when he had committed it to memory he had reached the minister’s house. As soon as he saw the reverend gentleman he began his message. " Maggie says ye air to come over and baptise the " " Is it the bairn ye mean, John ?’’ " Na, na, it’s noo that at a’,” said John in distress; “it’s the —the—it’s the elephant, menister!"

HE WANTED HIS MULE. While travelling in Virginia some time ago with a doctor we came upon an old coloured man who was standing by a mule hitched to an old two-wheel vehicle. " Dis mule am balked, boss." said the old man, "an’ I’ll jis gib a dollah to de man what can start 'im.’J “ I will do it for less than that, uncle, said the doctor. He took his case from the carriage and selected a small syringe, which he filled with morphia. He went to the side of the mule, and quickly inserting the syringe in his side pushed the contents into the animal. The mule reared upon his hind legs, and giving an astonishing bray started down the road at a break-neck speed. The aged coloured man gave a look of astonishment at the doctor, and with a loud "Whoa” started down the road after the mule. In the course of ten minutes we came up to ibe old man, standing in the road waiting for The mule was nowhere in sight. .< cl boss,” said thedarkey, " how much is dat Shift ym p»t in dat mule ?” - Oh. about m seats, laughingly replied th f. Well, boss, yo 'kin squirt twenty cents, wuf in me right away. Heah ara ds &ash. must ketch dat ar mule." A bridegroom in Chicago, recently, after the marriage ceremony, slipped a two-dollar bill into the minister's hand, and murmured apologetically, "I’ll do better next time."