A SURPRISE PARTY.

Temuka Leader, Issue 1679, 29 December 1887, Page 3

A SURPRISE PARTY.

Another Surprise party has got itself into diffioulfcic) in a Malbourne suburb. The other night a »core or io of people, young and old, enthusiastic oyer the now find-out, loaded a tip-dray and a perambulator withunotuons pastry, weighty-cake, sandwiches, poultry, fermented and spirituous liquors, and a wind and string band, and oarried the peaceable home of a oivil servioe swell by storm, They swarmed oyer tho place like a locust plague, deposited composite dishes on the plush suite, and spread stuffad poultry on the piano. As they entezed, the company howled a patter song, and the two bands mixed ir a hand-to-hand medley, and the rattle and din drove the servant girl into the cellar, under the impression that the house had been seized by a band of escaped lunatics. The baby awoke and screamed itself into convulsions} the cat went up the chimney with its back arohed and its tail sticking out like the handle of a pan; and the house dog howled a sad, soulful howl which might have touohed the heart of a polioeman ; while the hostess, who was left alone to entertain the party, her husband having gone back to the office, or somewhere, looked as woeful as a thirsty journalist on a through train. But the Surprise Party didn't notice ; it turned the furniture ead-on, spilt gravy on the carpets and tore round to its heart's content, till a late hour. It was still carrying on with unabated vigor, when the front door opened, a shaky step came up the hall, and mine host burst upon the scene of the festivities. The wild revelry came to an abrupt termination, and solemn silence prevailed. The man of the house stood j ust within the door, and gazed stupidly upon the congregation. His face was red, and his eyes were bleary, his shiit bulged out in front, and bore unmistakable traces of blood and boer, his pants were split at the knees, his ooat hung half off, and his silk hat appeared to have been run over by an engine and worried by a dog. He subjected the orowd to an idiotio survey, then, turning to his wife, lurched up against a table and asked her in a solemn and impressive voioe if " thanh wash i «h way" she oarried on whilst he was at the offioe, struggling to make ends meet. Then he accused her of getting all her relations and friends to eat up everything in the house, whilst her poor husband was away working his body and soul to rags j and he waxed wrath, and he offered to fight the Surprise for five pounds ten and the gate money. He hit one man in the ear, and knooked him over a ohair into a pie; and it took all his wife's blandishments to restrain him till the visitors escaped, which they did at express speed. Next morning the house father arose with a big head, and spent the day deliberating within himself whether it would be advisable to apologise to all hands, or hang himself in the hen-house. Decision pending. ___________

Edward Arthur was committed for trial at Dunedin yesterday for assaulting and robbing a Chinaman, Mr Hainan, of Dunedin, has been appointed Lecturer on Chemistry and Metallurgy at the Bendigo School of Mines, Sandhurst, Victoria, At the inqueßt on the body of a man, name unknown, found hanging to a tree at Merton, Otogo, a verdict of suicide was returned.

Two houses in Stafford Btreet, Dunedin, owned by the Hon. W. H. Reynolds, and occupied by a Mrs Berry and a Chinaman, respectively, were completely destroyed by fire late on Tuesday night. Both housss were uuinsursd.

On Saturday John Rotbery, aged 19, sob of Henry Rothery, was drowned in Lake Ellsmere, North Canterbury,