The Temuka Leader THURSDAY, DECEMBER 16, 1886. THE WAYS OF THE WORLD.

Temuka Leader, Issue 1526, 16 December 1886, Page 2

The Temuka Leader THURSDAY, DECEMBER 16, 1886. THE WAYS OF THE WORLD.

The Tapanni Courier tells a story of a mipsioner who was travelling by sea in very stormy weather. The rev. gentleman was not at all satisfied that he was perfectly safe, and asked the captain whether he thought there was ;*ny danger.; .The captain led him to the door of the forecastle and told him to listen. The. rev. gentleman. said be heard nothing bht the vilest profanity, and expressed. horror at the, language the men were making use, of. The captain told him that whilej the men were making use of such .. janguage he was perfectly, safe, as , they i?ease to swear the moment theyi- were confronted with, danger. The rev. 1 gentleman returned to his bunk, but the storm increased in violence. " He got up and stole "to the door of the forecastle and listened, ahd shortly* afterwards he was beard to exclaim ‘‘Thank God, thev are swearing, still. We are safe.” This reminds me of a true story; j A British man-of : war while entering ! in foggy weather a Newfoundland harbor a few years ago nearly ran down a trading vessel. The sailors bn board the trader evidently bad no hope of escape, for as the man-of-war neared them they fell upon their knees and began to pray. The vessels, however, passed without colliding, and the very moment danger was over the sailors jumped off their knees and commenced to curse, swear, and shake their fist* at the man-of-war. They prayed while in danger ; when it was all over they swore horribly. “ When the Devil was sick, the Devil a Saint would be; When the Devil got well, the Devil a Saint was he.” There is a story told of a man who Was sent t» gaol for larceny, and who wrote to bis wife as follows :—“ Dear wife—As they have pot me in gaol make them pot you in the poor-bouse, so as to save expenses.” That man had wonderful ideas of economy, and this is exactly the economy that is being resorted to in Ireland at present. Hitherto the poorest man or woman in Ireland looked with horror oh having to gb to the poor-boose. The disgrace of it was far worse than the poor diet they ; got and the privations they suffered. This, however, has been changed, and it is now considered a very laudable thing to go to the poor-house in Ireland under certain circumstances. The poor-houses are supported by rates raised from property, and therefore the greater the number of people that find their way into them the higher will be the ratel leviable. The National League pointed out to the people that they coaid not punish landlords in any way better than by going into the workhouses, and making them support them there, Accordingly, large numbers, who would, have rather died than go to the work- ; house before 1 now walk straight into them when they are evicted from their farms, so as to make landlords support them there. And it is said that this has a deterrent effect on evictions, and that it has assisted in bringing landlords to (heir senses. They do not see the advantage of evicting people only to have to support them in the poor-houses. Chinamen have shown wonderfa! aptitude for learning European, or, rather colonial ways. They,have found oat how to commit suicide, to go through a bankruptcy court,' to personate Scotchmen, and to perform many of the other tricks, for which colonists are distinguished, bat it would appear that so far they have not learned how to swear in that peculiarly energetic manner, which distinguished our !bullock-drivers. A Chinaman the other day was trying to persuade his horse to pull a rather heavy load, bat the animal would not be bought over with blandishment, even tbongh couched in the flowery language of the celestial empire, nod would not move. Xbe sad melancholy smile of the Chinaman vanished ; he lost all patience with the disobedient horse, and at last stood in front of the animal, and, looking it fall in the face, said “ Oh yon liar.” This is not exactly the language a bullockdriver wonld have made use of. Anyone can edit a paper. It is as easy as shelling peas, or falling off a log. All yon have to do is to sit down and write things. So thought a Taranaki parson who was asked to All the editorial chair of an up-country , paper during the temporary absence of the regular “ ink-slinger. ” His first " leader/’ which Was also his last, began

with : we look back upon the untrodden patjtis of the future, we behold the footprints of an Almighty hand'.” Talking about editing s paper brings to .my/iriind/tbo following story told of an American editor sad-faced country editor, with fringe on the heels of his, trousers and the wind sighing mournfully through his whiskers ,fsat in ! his sanctum, thinking—thinking. Presently a shadow fell across the room, and a voice demanded to know; if :he was the editor. “ Yes, sir,” bo ssid,, vritb a lodb of alarm. Then the owner of the voice mopped the floor with the editor and went his way. “ Thank heaven I” exclaimed the editor, after he bad gathered the wreck of his former self together and bad straightened up the furniture, “ life is stilt worth living for. I expected every minute that ho would tell me to stop his paper!” Cbm O’Lanus.