A DIALOGUE.

Temuka Leader, Issue 174, 10 September 1879, Page 2

A DIALOGUE.

Edward the greatn

To be or not to be 1 There’s the rub What strange news is this I hear 1 The kingdom which the Hon. Mr. Stafford conquered for me with his two-edged sword is threatened to be wrested from me. Why is this 1 Was not the battle fairly won, and did not good Bishop Woolcombe consecrate me to the work, and prayed for my peacahle possession of the conquered country? Yet, what do I hear—that a. coarse half-bred Southern Corsican has invaded my territory, and raised a rebellion amongst ray loyal subjects. What shall I do? Ah ! I will call my dear Desdemona. Oh, Desdemona, Desdemona ! You will never hear mo again in Temnka in a voluntary. How proud was I to see you there, when I played “ The Campbells are - coming,” and ran my fingers over the Gamah. Little did 1 think I was so soon to be challenged to fight. That great big Cox With his crowing spoiled my nest. These Cox Growings do not do me any good. He is a good game (not a jail) bird, but he has lost his spurs and ca - not fight. Ha can only crow, and disturb my rest. This is very hard, and mo so weak. I have not yet recovered from the rush of th - »t Timaru bull. He me badly, dear Desdemona, and gored Ufce with his long horns. I cried to my dear Timaru friends to Turn (the) bull, but they could not do it. How, I feel so weak from loss of blood. Oh, I du Fel(d)wick ! Quarrelsome Alick, ton, is the ring- Leader , mounted upon that Grey gilding (Grey is a nasty . color; I dop’t like jt). That brute. bow I .. have bated him, yet he runs at me withopen mouth. He lashed out fearfully, too, and kicked against the te monstrous job.” I wish I never had any hand in that business. but I will put it upon (my) Ostler. He is dead now. It was he that did it. Never mind ; they will never know. But. tint C-uiuty Council business. WCI, I am not particular to a crammer or two. I wonder if therer woreany minutes kept of that meeting. I Will chance it. But that little Temuka clique. It is always click, clicking, and never gives me any peace. What shall I do with it, dear Desdemon a ? I will call Julius. He’s the booy. He will have forgotten all about the County Coun-

cil business, and my> ingratitude -o him for killing so manyi'horses in the last battle, .‘He did,say I was a d——d scoundrel, and Lo fw|s far 1 wonder lie ditfnot find it out sooner, too. Never mind, I will put a big customer on to him. You knew he will do anything fora custom'r. Julius is easily gulled. I must muster hearts 01. courage. If I am ti)rashed by that gaunt half-bred Southern, I would have no more chances of telling the waking men that they can go to the devil, xor all I care for them. Then, that Grey autocrat who cheated me out of a billet. How he would crow. I wonder what I had best do. I will call on He is an inimitable mimic, and a very skilful financier. He Drained all the money out of the Provincial chest. If I could only get in Parliament again, and the Hall-cnm-McLean-cum-Stevens Ministry, would we not soon put an end to that “ monstrous job ” —that Milford Harbour job I mean. Mr Hall is a friend of mine, you know, and a real Timarn man. If we could only get that Grey Government put aside, Timarn would be attended to. They do not desire it, though. Look at what I did for them. I gave them their High-School, Post Office, Telegraph Office and many other things, to the great neglect of the Geraldine district. Desdemona : Nevermind, Edward. Jid ins will see you all right. I wish he would not m'iud that Scales and that Gam act so much though. There’s Cocks and Gammat, and that Poll-in-skin fellow with the Maori blanket. He comes from the swamp. He has animmense power over Julius. He will see you a l l right. But what about Geraldine ? Don’t you think it unwise to Post(lethwaite) so much with his (S)pearpoints. They are too “Slack’ up there. Look at that big Frenchman -with the waxed "moustache. 1 thought the Bonapartist family were extinct, but it seems not so. This one is only a “Walker’ keeping sentry over the Government Preserves. I wish he would shoot that Fiaxman. He is too lowbred to mix with our circle. He is a near relation to the working man, which you, my dear Edward, so thoroughly hate. And that Angus McDoudie. Poor creature/ he means well, but I fear he will be behind the times. Could you not take a Tripp to Orari Gorge ? You will find a real gentlemen there, and he can rattle the bones so well, He is so accommodating, too. Julius and he are great friends now. He is Chairman of the Country Council. Julius, you know, was so very anxious for this honor. Poor fellow, is it not a shame to keep him out of it? I ami sure, dear Edward, you would at any rate make him a J.P. if you get in again Is It not cruel of them to say you are not truthful? By-the-bye, dear Edward, I forgot to ask you how you recovered from those nasty thrusts of that Timaru bull. Let me see. My poodle will lick the sores. Stop! Here is pussy. She will lick them, and they will soon hed.

Many thanks, ray dear Dcsdemooa, but •I would rather not. Don’t let that Cnt(ho)lic the sores. She has n raspy' tongue, and would open up the oP sores. I had a rush from a bishop once in Dunedin, and he rradc a great gash. I would not for all the world have that sore ripped np again.' Here comes that nasty fallow from the South again. I do-hate that fellow. Ho knows iboirriuch. Had it not been for him I would soon stop t/ie clicking of tbatTemnka clique. ’ Now, I do not knbw what to’do. Ido not care for’ the Templars. I like a glass.of untaxed beijr too well for that. Nor do I feel incHhed to tax my friends the squatters. They am such jolly fellows, especially that Tawl Frenchman. And that Postilthwaito, too. He helped me into Hammon’s B. D. Ed. Asylum, or I do not know what I should have done. lam sure he will sustain my rule in Geraldine. My Chaplain, too, be reads my Koran (the Timaru Herald). My true and faithful henchman will not forget to ad vise my loyal subjects. He was invited to join the rebels, but he is too loyal for that. I trust to him a good deal to suppress this rebellion. You know he also carries a twm-edgod sword, and gives some nasty blows. Oh, rhy ! Oh. my ! What am I doing here 1 Sir George Grey, iny dear friend, is mustering a great army I fear I will not be able to give battle again. That stupid class of my subjects—the working class—won’t stick to me. •They want cheap land (the cheek of them). The land is for the sheep—not for thorn. They want the rich land owners taxed. To that I w:II never agree. But I may have to promise them though ; that does pot cost much. No good politician cares for, telling the truth. Good-bye, dear Desdemona. We must hope for the. best.