FOOTBALL.

Taranaki Daily News, Volume LII, Issue 358, 8 April 1910, Page 8

FOOTBALL.

Football, hockey and other winter sport enthusiasts are asked to note that owing to the desire to keep the ground in. good order for matches, the Recreation Sports Ground Committee do not intend to allow any practising during the coming winter on their ground.

A USEFUL REMINDER,

An M.P., who, in his magisterial cap-' acity, periodically visited a private lunatic asylum, told" the story of a man of some position in the legal world who went to see a patient who bad occasional lapses into sanity. The patient' made a great impression on his visitor ' as a well-informed, healthy-minded gen- j tleman, and wa,s assured that his case! should be enquired into. | On leaving ,the gateful patient cour- j teoualy conducted his morning caller to j the iront door, affectionatelv pressing his 'hand at parting. - • ■ | "You won't forget what I've told; you?" he pleaded, with tears in his j voice. j "No," responded the visitor, turning j round to descend the father long flight 1 of steps. "I don't think you will," said the pa-1 tiemt dreamily, "but lest you should,! you know——" ' I And, lifting up his foot, he gave the j unsuspecting, defenceless visitor a kick ! behind that sent him spinning down I the stairway sprawling on the gravel. j

EMPRESS OF THE NURSERY. Miss Mary Warren tells an amusing anecdote in which the Kaisw had to play a second part.

One day he was experimenting with a small American canoe, and in his enthusiasm cried: "All my boys shall be canoeists!"

The inventor was delighted, and thought the thing was as good as settled.

But presently the Kaiserin came along. "That is too dangerous," said she. "I shall never allow my children in a •canoe."

"But," said the inventor, "The Kaiser has already given his consent." "Oh, that may be," said she, with the sweetest of smiles in the direction 0 f her husband. "He may be the Emperor of Germany, but I am the Empress of the nurserv."