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Colonist, Volume IV, Issue 373, 21 May 1861, Page 4

The Real Article.—A milk pedlar, finding that his business was not just what it should be, resolved to tack about and sell milk, instead of milk and water, as he had formerly done, and thus test tho soundness of the old maxim about the policy of honesty. A day or two after he had effected the aforesaid change, he was told by one of his customers, a matronly lady of some experience in life, that he need bring no more millc to her. In great surprise, he asked her the reason why. " Because," said she, s« the article you yesterday sold me was the strangest stuff I ever saw. It had not stood three hours when it had a nasty yellow scum on it 1 I must have the real sky blue article that I have always been accustomed to have."

Holloway's Ointment and Pills.—lnflammation of sensitive parts, piles, fistulas, and such like painful diseases, may, without consulting any one, be presently relieved and ultimately cured by the proper and diligent use of this cooling and healing Ointment; whoae action should, ia

such cases, be assisted by judicious doses of Holloway's Pill's. Ere many days have elapsed the anxious patient will experience a wonderful degree of ease from this treatment. Doubts and fears will soon disappear, and the sufferer will bless tbe day on which he first applied these remedies. They are equally si itable to both sexes,■ all ages, and any climate; nor it there efficiency impared by long keeping. Their action on the frame is nothing, safe, aud certain.

Speaking the Truth Quietly.—A quaint old minister of a parish in Lanarkshire one Sunday morning gave his text from the Psalms, '«I said in my haste all men are liars," and began his sermon by thoughtfully saying, " Aye, David, ye said it in your haste, did you ? If ye had lived io this parish ye might have said it at your leisure !"