MISCELLANEOUS.

Te Aroha News, Volume II, Issue 103, 23 May 1885, Page 6

MISCELLANEOUS.

The British Parliament will be dissolved in November next. Breaches of Contract.— Masber trousers. The defences of Sydney are now complete. The pugilist's beverage— Punch. The Freezing Company's works at Waitara will employ over 100 men. A widow marries the second time to revenge herself for the first. The Tasmanian Parliament meets on 12th June. The official average of the Queensland loan was £97 19s|4d. Subscriptions are to be taken in Melboir ne towards the Gordon memorial fund, The New Zealand loan of one million will )e p aced on the London market next month, a gentleman who has recently lost an eye begs to intimate tkat.hehas now a "vacancy for pupil." Mr Wakefield, M.H.R., has joined the Wellington "Evening Press" in the capacity of editor and part proprietor. Giving a yelling baby opiates to make it sleep may kill the baby. Not giving it opiates will be very apt to kill the parents. It is difficult to tell what to do. In Germany last year 23 cigarette factories turned out 187,000,000 cigarettes, and the output of the French cigarette factories was 600,000,000. " Waiter i" " Yes, sir." "What's this?" "It's bean soup, sir." "No matter what it has been. The question is, what is it now ?" " Cauliflower " writes to say that "dendrobium giganteum odontoglossum raezlic " is not a flower. Well, neither ia a cauliflower, co we are quits. Hon. Mr Larnach is at Coromandel, and has promised to assist Kapanga and Tokatea mines to open up the claimß. The youth who woos and wins a girl at the skating rink will find it but a few steps from roller skates to the roller pin. Two message boys having called at a house in Wellington before the inmates were out of bed, the head of the house fired off a revolver, under the impression that burglars were about. He is now being sued for damages by the parents of the boys. The election of the Hon. R. Stout to be Fellow of the New Zealnnd University has been approved by His Excellency. The Victorian Parliament has been fnrther prorogued until June 17. A letter from an American theatrical manager says : — "Sheridan hasmarried Miss Louise Davenport." Carraway seeds, which can be grown in North New Zealand, produce 12 to 16 cwt to the acre, and command a high price. A husband who was extolling his personal prowess to his wife was suddenly kissed by the latter. " What is that for ?" he asked. " I'm giving a kiss for a blow," she replied. The Committee of Greymouth Hospital threaten to resign when the Government place them in funds to meet current expenditure by the 27 th inst. The Salvation Army has been defeated at Thames, by a determined publican who beat his dinner gong while the leaders were speaking, and compelled the Army to "move on." Natives in Kotorua district are just now said to be favourable to selling their lands. There has been somo talk in London of a probable stoppage of the San Francisco mail service. The £50 spent on teaching law to our City Councillors would have been much better spent on J.P,'s. Wreckage of a small boat has been washed ashore at Pakerau, near Wellington. The Canterbury Volunteers are to have a field day at New Brighton on May 25th. Dunedin University Council have resolved to recommend their Classical Professors not to read the alleged immoral plays by Terence in classes in which there are lady students. We learn from a contemporary that Mr Wybert Reeve, the well-known comedian, appeared in the pulpit of a Unitarian Church in Melbourne, presided over by Mr George Walters, and lectured to a large Sunday audience. The local Rationalists should take the hint. " Did you pass the hat ?" the pastor of a Texas congregation asked his deacon, after the morning service. "Yes, I did," said the deacon, and then, looking into the vacant interior of a hat that showed nothing but lining, he added, gloomily, "So did everybody else." The Rev. Donald McCallum, parish minister of Waternish, Skye, formerly of Raasay, gives a most deplorable account of the hard-heartedness and inhumanity of some of the Skye landlords. In addressing a meeting in Glasgow in favour of the crofter movement, he stated that he had published in the newspapers that the laird of the parish in which he officiated (Maclood of Macleod) had not only his (Mr McCallum's) property (the Glebe), but also the churchyard, for his rabbits. The laird, in reply to this accusation, said that the minister was a liar, and that he had only four rabbits in the churchyard. Macleod also maligned the parishioners outrageously, and said that he did not care although the rabbits ate the bones of their forefathers in the buryingground. Mr McCallum has taken up the cudgels on behalf of the crofters, and does not spare the merciless landlords. He is in favour of Skye emigration to New Zealand.