MISCELLANEOUS.

Te Aroha News, Volume II, Issue 99, 25 April 1885, Page 6

MISCELLANEOUS.

To get along well — Dig it deep. Lambton Ward, Wellington, has declared for more " pubs." Orthographic— lt is a poor speller who does not have an "i" to business. All editors are communists— They shear and shear alike. Russia is building an 11,000 ton ironclad warship, at a cost of £650,000. " We keep the world in good spirits," is the trade-mark of the Kentucky distillers. Te Aro to the rescue. This Wellington ward alone has declared for no more "pubs." The extreme depth of misery is a small boy with a new pair of boots and no mud puddle. It has been proved that a penny will pay for a good substantial dinner for a schoolboy in England. Italy has 3,250,000 men in its army, and some of the finest ships and guns in the world. The Bank of Now Zealand has moved into the premises at Sydney which were formerly occupied by the Oriental Bank. A blasted idiot (usually)— The blithesome individual that undertakes to open a dynamite cartridge with a brick. I The mercantile marine of Great Britain ! includes 15,384 sailing vessels and 5,000 steamers. New Government Insurance Association regulations and tables are published in the Gazette. A fact to be remembered by expectants. — In making wills some are left out and others are left tin. We stand corrected. The Napier " Telegraph " reminds us that the telephone charges are much cheaper in Tasmania than in the colony. It is stated that the Premier, now on his way to Wellington, will strike the Wanganui Hiver somewhere, and Major Kemp will take him down the river in a canoe. At Sydney, the other day, a gold cup, valued at 400 guineas, was given to Beach by Mr D, M. Robertson. As the champion did not jump on the cup, we presume it was not a "sham." An impassioned orator latel/ declared that " Woman is a silent power in the land." This will be news to thousands of husbands. " Snooks " ha 3 scored one this time. He triumphantly asks whether playing low comedy would not be a de Grey-ding thing for the company now in the Opera House. Heie is a Queensland tragedy told in a telegram: — "Man, name unknown, reported found dead at Caranbotta station, Georgina river. Piece of paper found on the body, on which were written the words, "Bitten by snake.'" The land of England and Wales, if divided among the population, would give an acre and a half to each individual. Miss Elizabeth Wordsworth, grandniece of the poet, is Principal of Lady Margaret's Hall for young girls at Oxford, and is a famous Greek scholar. One of the railway companies whose line runs out of Boston purposes submitting to its employes a temperance pledge with an ultimatum to "sign or go." The Socretary of State for the Colonies has sent a despatch stating that Her Majesty will not be advised to exercise her power of disallowance with respect to Acts passed last session by the Legislature of "New Zealand. In September next scientific observers from Sydney, Melbourne, and elsewhere intend meetin£ near Masterton to witness the total eclipse of the sun, which can there be best observed. It is very likely that the chiefs of the Melbourne and Sydney Obser1 vatorie?, Professor Ellery and Mr Russell, will be amongst the observers. Mr Millward, the popular accountant of the National Bank at New Plymouth, has 1 received orders to proceed to Auckland, where he is to be stationed. His departure (says the local paper) will be much regretted, as during his live years stay there ho has made a large circle of friends, and ha 3 always taken a great interest in social matters. Besides winds and earthquakes, Wellington is earning a reputation for slander and libel actions. This week a case comes on in the Supreme Court in which Charles Wm, Cutler, Solicitor, sue 3 Daniel Clunio, C.E., for damages for stating that plaintiff had improved his property to the extent of £180 or Cl9O at the expense of the Island Bay Park Company. In a letter to the Melbourne "Argus" M. Jules Joubcrt writes at follows : "In your cable messages it is said that the Maharajah of Gwalior has offered the services of 20,000 men to England. What Scindia has done will be followed by Hyderabad, Ulwar, Dholpure, and a score of smaller Indian piinces, whose armies in the aggregate will number upwards of 100,000 men, well armed, thoroughly efficient, and whose loyalty to the British Crown is undeniable. The late poisoning cases make the following quite apropos : —Old lady (to chemist) : "Aro you quite sure this is carbonate of soda -not arsenic !" Chemist : " Quite, ma'am ; try it, and judge for yourself." A fashion paper says :— " The new under- ; skirt pretends to be full when it really is not." In this respect it differs somewhat from a man. The latter pretends not to be full when he really is. Thore is nothing that so takes the starch out of a young man who has been wedded about a year as to have to go to a shop where there is a girl serving with whom ho used to keep company, and inquire for those large safety pins !

I urn i i ■--II 1 •**»»• t ' i "SfcanfavdV .special tywsponder.t telegraphs tStnt the A f ghuns ar^ stu ums\y moderate in their manner towar Is the Bu&suvns. • .' -