TIT BITS.

Samoa Times and South Sea Gazette, Volume 2, Issue 54, 12 October 1878, Page 2

TIT BITS.

By A \ Old Gossip. T). J. has handed iu the following for Tit Bits : My dearest pet. you must not fret. Nor call me very stupid. Should Mistress Muse, my suit refuse. And bravo the shafts of Cupid. In this 'ere fight, I've tried to write, And use my wit sarcastic. Yet I am told, that tho' 'tis bold, It sounds more like bombastic. In the stream of life, we catch a wife, A doubtful earthly blessing, Our meshes 'tis true, some wili got through But that's not so distressing. So out again, I'll stretch my skein, Such fish arc always funny, With hand and glove, some are with love, But most are caught with money. I'll scent mv locks, put on clean socks, And I will beta -billing. To drive a trade, with widow or maid, For they are over willing. Tho gentle rain poureth down upon the just and the unjust this w .4:. but we are never satisfied. Like the good old lady church member, wu think tho thing's been overdone. During a long drought her favourite parson prayed lor rain. He was zealous and prayed fervently. That night tho rain came down in torrents. In the morning when she viewed the havoc made in her gardon by tho storm, she exclaimed, "Just look at that '. That parson never attempts anything but he overdoes it. I wanted just a gentle drizzle all night, and he had to go and get up a storm." England has turned out to be tho boss Turkey gobbler.

Some of the " host " chairs sold in this place are reully worth about one shilling. They may cost tuu shillings, hut they must hi- handled with extreme caution. Even a severe look east iu the direction of thorn has been known to strain the pegs and make the hack yawn. The noise of r family quarrel would probably wreck them completely. There is one way in which they can he utilized ; with tho backs sawed off they make tolerable Stools. Emperor Wilhclm to his people. "1 have not done as much for you a-, I have wished, hut you will admit that us « target I have served you faithfully." What says Nature? "Behold the animals of the plains ami forfeits; kind to kind have an equal chance for sustenance. Look to the symmetry of the vegetable creation, kind to kind exist equally. Gaze on life iu the dc-p; there as everywhere in all Nature, as it has its being iu its myriad forme, Wo observe kind to kind, equal in life."—Communist Yes, "gftte" upon the whole animal king' {loin. They are ongaged in eating one another up, and Man i* the greatest pluttonofall. Even in the vegetable creation the w Is and thistle* are Keeking to crowd out the gran and the grain. Man preys upon everything, vegetable a::d

•uian.ii. He prey- uj>. D liii «.»u kitd VuiOOg men there art bexsts of prey '*:i)u Honesty mutt guard against The Cannibal," the Capitalist and the Communist Every Capitalist hj a>t a rascal, nor every Communist; but both classes m»sj watching. Russia and Turkey pitted against England and Austria would be a inoet liv< !y spectacle. That state of affairs was not contemplated a few months ago. 'Wt it is within the vague of possibility. I say Dick, old boy, I feel sick. I'm afraid I'm going to have the vertigo! Oh, i.s th;it so ' I thought you never knew von- to go ! Oh !uh ! leg, J see, 1 fee! better.

The reason why potatoes do so well under ground, is that they have so many pal-potatoes. V\ o want a few more pigs to roam our streets, and u few more mud puddles to step into. The nightly scenes in Matafelo are ! calculated to inspire feelings of odraira- , tion for the police system of Apia. | There was quite "a freshet in the river I this week, but Williamson's bridge stood j the test. Why can't we have some law and order : on our streets at night!