SATURDAY GOSSIP.

South Canterbury Times, Issue 2844, 6 May 1882, Page 2

SATURDAY GOSSIP.

Evil days have fallen upon the port again. The mystery is,and it is a mystery, whether the ship was sound or not. The shippers will be able to bear up with fortitude under the loss, and probably the good Cambrian skipper will not fret. I fancy, judging from the general demeanor of the men when they landed at the Breakwater on Tuesday night that they are not exactly the most reliable sort of men to have under one’s command. Captain McGowan accounted for their not returning to the ship with assistance from the shore, on the supposition that “ they were detailing the catastrophe to the people on shore,” which was actually the case ; for each mariner as he landed became the centre figure of a curious group. We are| all agreed about one thing. Captain McGowan, of the Benvmue, is a British seaman every inch, and if the Harbor Board don’t entertain him at dinner, or make him some presentation, they are meaner than they ought to be. Pluck, resolution and skill are very valuable qualities, and the Board ought to recognise them in connection with the shipping.

I am unable to decide which “ line ” to adopt—that of bank manager or parson. Power pleaseth me, and I would have it. Whether ’tis better to stand in a pulpit and hold a spiritual whip over the people in the pews, or to ensconce one’s self in a capacious arm chair in a parlor, and from that snug and easy position play, as an angler, with men in temporary straits. His Upstandable Highness descends from his chariot with lordly mien, and as ho passes into the Bank door, you observe him with envy. But, my dear greonface, you don’t know what takes place inside. The great man is “pushed,” and he must get down off his stilts and bend his knees just a little and ask a favour. How bland, how cordial, how interested in the manager’s state of health! The little accommodation got, up goes the crest, and the great man vaults into his stilts once more, and the equipage drives off again. Ah, my dear Greenface, these stately fellows are all sawdust, rely upon it. And they have to get down on their knees some times, though they do cleave air with their chins when you meet them. On full consideration, I elect the managership, and wait for one of the Banks to solicit me.

Our colonial society is disfigured horribly by pretentiousness. How is it that some people seem (for they show it pretty plainly) to imagine themselves in some way superior to their neighbors, and are very particular “ who they shall know.” I confess I never could and never shall understand it. It is a matter of indifference to mo whether a hodman or (what is the highest typo of respectability ?) say a Bishop speaks to me. 1 entertain no more respect for the one than the other, unless by the way the hodman turns out to ‘have more brains than “ his lordship.” Wo all voucrato

what is good and great, but those apple-headed shams who have impertinence and no brains, psha! they are snobs, simply, purely, hopelessly, snobs.

The clergy in Christchurch arc grappling with the larrikin difficulty. The Dean makes a proposition which I think is a highly practical one—the most practical I ever heard of from a parson. He advocates a gymnasium, in other words a “ free and easy" (without liquor or female society of course) being provided forthe rowdies — that they should be induced to go there, not to sit down on forms, chew buns and sing doxologies, or try to be pious, but to do “ just what they darn please ” for a while. Then gently, gradually, the barriers of decorum might bo put up round them, and the shy colt be approached and perhaps made a good horse of. Bravo, Dean ! If you carry out your scheme you will be worth more to the Church than all the Cathedrals in the world, and one of the great benefactors of the race. Go it, dear old Dean ! I never thought it was in you.

I wish the next revivalist that comes by would call on me ; —not with a view to awakening me, but because I could give him a chart. I know some “ hard cases ” in Timaru that might be experimented upon, I’m serious, really.

The Borough Council are trying to do their best, I really believe. lam quite satisfied with you while you go on as you do now ; you are improving ; the streets are being looked after a little, But don’t bo intoxicated with this word of praise and go a-ba?ksliding. Above all do not fall out with one another. Accept the hint dear councillors ! PtJOK,