SATURDAY GOSSIP.

South Canterbury Times, Issue 2826, 15 April 1882, Page 2

SATURDAY GOSSIP.

Sir Homy Burkes is seeing life. The guest of Dukes, Lord Mayors, Inatilutes and poets, will have acquired a very substantial coating of polish on bis return to Sydney. Look back on the days when “ Botany Bay ” was a name of horror 'and compare them -with the present time, -when its representative is “ taken up ” by the greatest in the land ! The Institute of Civil Engineeis. have been particularly civil and'cordialto Sir Henry, Knowing fellows! Do they sniff prospective contracts in a pros perous colony, and wisely think a little affability bestowed in the right time and place may go a long way ?

Or Jackson came out of his shell the oilier night in the worthy cause of drainage, He thought the health of the town ought to be the first consideration. Some councillors conld see nothing beyond the effect on their own interests. Now Councillor Jackson does not, I believe, set up for being a lavishly generous individual, but ho showed a good,deal more liberality of spirit than some others did.' ,

A little after one o’clock on Friday morning, an hour after midnight, the Post Office clock gave it up, and, like the Government that had ereetod it, ceased to go. Andrew, come forth and do thy work !

At a Baptist meeting house in Auckland it was announced last Sunday that two vexatious institutions, the seat rents and “ the plate,” were to be abolished. There will be some chance for the sinners as well as the saints to get threepenny bits now. Hitherto they have been in almost exclusive possession of the latter. I congratulate the Baptists on .their resources. I fear the abolition of the plate here would mean a general collapse of business.

;I some time ago conceived an attachment to a lady, and- Fidler . was her mellifluous name. I don’t know where she is now. I rather fancy she must he in heaven, and, if so, I am sure she is clad in the snowiest of robes and plays on the goldenest of harps. When I used do. hear of- her she was a teacher of cdokerj'. I loved , her , with a philosophical, respectful, platonic affection, as a benefactor of her species. My-regret is that no one seems to have taken up her good work. From observation I have learned to think that the art of cookery is far too little esteemed and practised. It is quite astonishing how few working men’s wives and daughters (and others too for that matter) can cook decently. And yet good cookery is ho mean source of happiness ; good food well prepared, well cooked, and well served, goes a long way to make the body healthy and (reflectively) the mind happy. Tough, half-cooked meat,indigestible dumplings and hard potatoes,"served up cold and dirty are not exhilarating. ' Would that another Fidler would come forward 1

: There is fluttering in many bosoms now, in view of the coming distribution of portfolios., Couldn’t we send up somebody to take the Public Works Department. What a joke if a South Canterbury representative were by chance to be so elevated —and how Major Atkinson would enjoy the joke !

We are just able to keep our hair on, but we are not wild with delight at the liberality of the Railway Department towards the travelling public. The only idea of “ cheap trips ’’ that seems to enter the Departmental skull is “ single fare for double journey.”- Of course this is a concession, but don’t call it a “ cheap trip.” Pooh! I hope the Department won’t get its Back up.if I say that the prevailing idea of a cheap trip is “ half fare for double journey.” If this were granted and occasional ‘day trains’ put on, I venture to say the railways would take just about double the money they do now.

The bad weather that prevailed during the holidays, was rough ‘on the poor wives, but it played into the hands of some of the abandoned males. “ You can’t possibly go, my dear, but it would’nt do for me to stop at home. Keep up your spirits, and bye-bye till I return”. —and with this affable benediction the festive Oldrake tore himself away and marched off to the “ City of the Plains,” When he got there the weather was fine and delightful and our friend had a gay time, bar the difficulty of getting a bed. Everybody was jovial and there was a bewildering crowd of faces wreathed in smiles ; the beer was good and the whole appearance of things exhilarating. . After. the feast, comes the whipping of the cat. ' Over that let us draw the veil.

; A good deal of chaff and.ra.illery used to be indulged in about volunteering. It was playing at Soldiers, nonsensical affectation, the titles of Captain, Major, Colonel, and so forth founded abshrd when applied to shopkeepers and quill drivers. But this has given place to a very different sentiment, in this colony at least. No one; looking at the mass of citizen soldiers drawn up at the Exhibition building last Monday, could fail to experience a thrill of pride and pleasure at the sight of so large a body of ordinary citizens trained to the use of arms and capable of doing good service if called upon. If .ever it is our, misfortune to become involved in hostilities with a foreign power, we shall have to depend in a great measure on- our volunteers; and, therefore, all we can do to encourage.and assist them let us gladly do. i • It seems to be beyond a doubt that in 189?. this world will retire from the Universe. An English : Bishop is the. latest authority and he must have the news direct from Heaven. The concluding , ceremony will be a great display of fire-works. Puok.