THIS TERRIBLE WORLD WE LIVE IN

Rotorua Morning Post, Volume 1, Issue 194, 9 April 1932, Page 4

THIS TERRIBLE WORLD WE LIVE IN

Being tbe Brief Iiipressions of the MAN in the street on Chrrent Affairs What with Phar Lap's death, and Mr. Downie Stewart' s economy pro- .. posals, he had . felt ^epressed the whole week, saicT the Man iri the Street. That was to~say, until he had read about Mr. Coates and ,Mr. Forbes and Mr. Holland, standing together at a Salvation Army gather'ng, and singing "There Are Shadows in the Valley But There is Moonshine in the Hills." When he had read that altogether delightful message, he had sung so lustily himself, that he had swallowed a mouthful of bathwater and his wife had spoken to him through the keyhole about his language. * Our politicians were always revealing unsuspected gifts, which were about the only sort of gifts we were likely to have from them. He had never suspected that these three illustrious gentlemen could sing, although he always knew that they could talk. After this latest outburst, however, he was prepared to admit that they might be able to do anything — even play the saxophone or the Jew's harp. In fact, he thought that the moaning wail of the saxophone would be particularly suited to Mr. Forbes and. Mr. Coates, while their colleague, Mr. Stewart, should certainly be at home with the Jew's harp. So far as Mr. Holland was concerned, he was probably better acquainted with tbe hobos than the oboes.

It was all very well for tlie politicians to burst into song, but so far as the taxpayers were concerned, they felt a lot more like bursting into tears. Music reputedly, had charms to soothe the savage breast, but with these new taxation proposals, it would take a lot more than the Parliamentary Minstrel Boys to soothe a lot of breasts he knew about. Up to a point, however, he could understand this musical urge; he had had it .himself the other night after leaving the club, and had started to sing "Lead Kindly Light" until he | had found that it was a policeman who was doing the leading and that he was not doing it kindly at all. rf: * *

He had been deeply moved at the news of Phar Lap's death, which only went to confirm his conviction that nothing valuable should ever be taken to Chieago, even if A1 Capone was in gaol. He had known quite a lot of horses to drop dead in his time, but they had always done it in the middle of a race and usually when they were carrying his shirt. That was the difference between Phar Lap and an ordinary horse. He noticed that a water diviner had recently been divining water by wavirig a wand at Arapuni. He suggested that the diviner should immediately proeeed to Wellington and see what effect could be obtained by waving his wand over the heads of some of our members of Parliament. In any case, he failed to perceive the use of divining water at Arapuni or anywhere else. If he could divine, or even just pay for something to go with the water, he would do a lot more good. -V !tf sfe

He noticed that following the announcement of the wages cuts and the report of the Economy Commission, Mr. Norman (Lizard) Smith had decided to leave the country. He did not altogether blame Mr. Smith, and thought that if he had any sense, he would probably break more records getting out of the country, than he had managed to break in it. As against these national ealamities, however, there had been several more eheering messages in the day's news. He noticed that the electors in Newfoundland had finally decided to throw their politicans in the barbour, and thought that in years to come, the whole world might possibly acknowledge a debt to Newfoundland for showing it the shortest way out of its difficulties. # ^ ^ He had noticed a heading in yesterday's paper, "Mr. Lang Silent," but personally, he did not believe it. After all, Mr. Lahg was a politician as well as a lot of other things equally dubious. However, whether Mr. Lang remained silent or not, the man in the street said he was quite sure that his wifq. wouldn't, unless he gave his celebrated imitation 'of Mr. Lizard Smith.