NEAR AND FAR

Rotorua Morning Post, Volume 1, Issue 54, 26 October 1931, Page 2

NEAR AND FAR

Cheap Fruit in Brisbane. Astonishment at the scarcity of pineapples and the high price of oranges in South Island towns was expressed by a Brisbane merchant in Dunedin recently. He said that in Brisbane pineapples cost 2d each, and oragnes £d each. A great many returned soldiers were growing pineapples, and were in despair of finding a market for their goods, a quantity of the fruit going -to waste each season. "The pineapples I saw in the South Island shops were very poor, yet they cost ls 6d or more," he saicfcg: "Those procurable in Brisbane for 2d or 3 d are much larger, and more succulent. It is the same with oranges. Our 24-a-shilling ones are much larger thian your 400 per cent. dearer oranges. It seems to me a great pity that there is not some regular shipping service between Brisbane and South Island ports." No Buttons. A kindergarten teacher asked her class: "Have you warm coats?" "Yes," was the answer. "Can you take off your warm coats?" "Yes." "Has the bear a warm coat?" "Yes." Can the bear take off his warm coat?" "No." "Why can't the bear take of his warm coat?" This puzzled the youngsters for a moment, and then one yelled: "'Cause God only knows where the buttons are." Bomb Misftred. ** A poorly-aimed "bomb," consisting of a small paper bag filled "vvith flour, which was thrown by the pilot of an aeroplane during a bombing-the-car competition at Mangere aerodrome, narrowly missed a motor car parked at the edge of the flying field. The pilot, who was flying at a height of about 200 feet, threw the "bomb" too late, and the wind carried it well away from the target. It landed a few feet from a car filled with visitors, who for a few moments were enveloped in a cloud of flour. I j An Ancient Vice. j In the year 2750 B.C. people roll- ' ed dice that closely resemble those in use to-day. This surprising discovery was announced upon the return from Mesopotamia to the United States of Dr. E. A. Speiser, who excavated one of the ancient dice. It is made of balced clay, and it is cubical in shape. It differs from the modern variety in that the four is opposite the five. Jokes Which Had to be Paid For. "This is a very silly joke and one that cannot be tolerated nowadays. You will each pay a fine of 10s and 20s each as compensation to the prosecutor," said Mr. Griffith Jones, at Tower Bridge Police Court to John Henry Cox and James Wakeling, who had assaulted David James, of Dafan Road, Llanelly, by throwing him into a horse-trough. James said he was talking with another man when the accused dragged him to a horse-trough and ducked him in. They then ran away. Mr. Griffith Jones: "It would take you some time to get out of the horse-trough?" James: "Look you. It did not take me long, I tell you." "Two-inch Forehead." "She was one of that type which displays a 12-inch skirt and a twoinch forehead," said a member of the Ashburton Borough Council the other evening when describing how a couple had refused to take notice of his request that they should not walk over a newly-laid-out lawn in the Domain. He saw a young man and a young wo-> man starting over the lawn, and when he asked them not to walk on it the man resitated, but the woman urged him to go on, and he went on, badly marking the soft surface. Fliped Hke Pancakes. Patients are flipped over like pancakes by means of a hospital bed which has been designed by a Canadian inventor. The bed is expected to facilitate the examination of victims of accidents as soon as they are received, before the extent of their injuries is known. The patient is strapped into a fabric-covered framework directly over the mattress. If is becomes necessary to turn him over, the mattress is dropped and the framework is rotated. It may be ! moved through a eomplete circle, and i be held by clamps at any point in its | rotation while the patient is being j examined. A helmet keeps the pat- | ient's head from sagging. Introduced to her Son. An American mother recently in : Paris met an ex-soldier son, whom she did not know. She had not seen him j for 32 years, during which time he : had fought in the wai*. Her other son had died on his way to fight the Germans, states a London writer. The woman was Mrs. Emilie Kennedy, of Philadelphia, who went to Paris specially to see her son. When they met they had to be introduced to each other. Then they embraced and wept with joy. "It was almost like meeting a stranger at first," Mrs. Kennedy said afterwards, "but we soon found lots of things to talk about." Shortage of Tenors. Dr. Reginald Jaques, director of music at Queen's College,- Oxford, at the opening lecture of the tenth summer course in music teaching at Oxford, referring to the shortage of tenor voices, said: "The usual proportion of voices found is 75 sopranos, 40 contraltos, 18 basses, and 2 tenors. If you give a soprano a high note she holds on to it, but tenors are worse. They take it off the shelf, so to speak, and look at it for a very long time." Chapiin's Present. Film stars often receive embarrassing presents from their admirers, but few can have been presented with such a novel mark of esteem as Charlie Chaplin when he recently went to a bull-fight in San Sebastian, in Spain. Four matadors presented him with a dead bull. Touched by this gift, presented with all the traditional courtliness of the Spaniard, the comedian produced a silver cigarette case and handed it to the matadors. Charlie expressed himself as "very satisfied" with the bull-fighting, which, he said, was a "very virile and moving spectacle."