Page 1 Advertisements Column 1

Pukekohe & Waiuku Times, Volume 4, Issue 14, 19 February 1915, Page 1 (Supplement)

"Why on earth do you off or such a lar.g t i reward for the return of that horrid, yelping, snapping cur?" "To plcaso my wife." " But such a largo reward will he sure to bring him hack!" " Oil. 110, it won't! H'.'s dead! I drowned him myself!" An agricultural exjiort who had boon invited to address a meeting expressed opinions with which a local farmer, a plain, uncultured man. found fault. After a d'st'iisiion. iu which thoseu.se of the mooting was clearly with the farmer. the export lost his temper. "S r. "ho said to his opponent, striving t■ > speak coolly, "do you realize that I have l>con to two universities, 011 o in this country and one in Germany?'' "What of Ihaf?" demanded the farmer with a faintly flickering smile, f had'a calf that was nursed by two cows, and the observation T made was the more lie was nursed the greater call he grew." Freddy (aped six) was seated in a barber's chair. "Well, my little man," said the barber, "how would you like your hair cut?" "Like father's, with a round hole at tho top." She- "And knowing my sentiments on" the object, d(I that odious Mr. limits insult you by offering you a drink ?" . „ He: "That's what Mr. Binks did. She: "And how did you resent, it?" fro (niiX'kly): "I swallowed the inisalt!"