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Poverty Bay Standard, Volume IX, Issue 963, 23 July 1881, Page 7 (Supplement)

An acquaintance asked one who knew, where he could borrow £lO. The one who knew, confidentially told him to go to L— —. And when he told him he meant Lyons, the moneylender, it was too late, as the bridge of his nose was bent, and one of his optics bruised. The other day a man in the act of kicking his wife slipped and broke his leg in two places. This should be a warning to wife-beaters. Always see that your feet are well braced before beginning work.

On a tombstome at Ballarat, Victoria, is the following inscription :— “ John Adolphe Adams, accidently shot as a mark of affection by his brother.” But this isn’t half so bad as what appears in an advertisement in the Geelong evening paper : — “ Wanted a man that can milk a housemaid and a cook.” We consider that this joke alone is worth the price of the paper. A Useful Hint.—“ Jacob Terry ” (Mr. R. J. Creighton), in his interesting American notes, has the following : —“ I know New Zealanders take a hint kindly, even though they never intend to profit by it. Now, as you have not a very large market for your produce, would it not be as well to establish manufactures when you can? In the State of Maine, for several years, there was no demand for potatoes, but the farmers did not give up growing them. Co-operative starch factories were established to convert the potatoes into starch, and there arc now twenty-two of them in one country alone in that State. The factories run ninety days each season, and will use three million bushels of potatoes, at twenty cents, or lOd per bushel. This provides a local market for the potato crop of the country to the extent of £120,000, creates labour, and encourages the farmers. Starch will sell when potatoes are unsaleable. Why not trv it ?