MAD AS A HATTER.

Patea Mail, Volume VI, Issue 508, 14 April 1880, Page 2

MAD AS A HATTER.

A man who works hard when he is at it, and who is employed at the boiling-down establishment near the mouth of the Patea river, found himself detained in town yesterday, by having to take an inside cargo of rum, which is apt to make any craft unsteady in such a wind as that prevailingyesterday. After loading up inside, he still* found ii possible to carry an outside load, a kind of supercargo of one bottle of rum. There was rum inside and rum outside. Ho managed, by frequent tacking, to steer his course from the town to the wharf, and getting into a small boat, he sailed away in his trim-built wherry, “ strange countries for to see.” He sailed, and sailed, until man and boat were close on the wash of the breakers, which were then thundering upon the harbor bar under a full southerly gale, and rolling furiously up the river month. It was a case of boiling-down both in the water and on land, for no small boat could live in such a wash as was then sweeping past the shore where he wanted to land. But on the mail went, hit or miss, defying the elements as only a fool who is gloriously drunk can defy deadly peril. Those persons looking on saw the man struggling against the raging tide, and began to calculate how soon boat and man would disappear. Captain Bonner, of the steamer Clyde, could contain himself no longer, and despatched a sober man in a boat to go to the n-adman’a rescue. The boat with the rummy fellow in it was overtaken and brought back te a safe lauding ; and then the “ jolly dog” tumbled into a difficulty of another sort, for lie was there grapped by two officers in blue, known as “ blowflies,” and haled off (cargo and all) to a certain safe lodging provided at tlm public expense. There ho was left with his cargo—left alone in his glory, to dream of crossing the Alps in an open boat with a bottle of rum in his hand. This man would be an interesting subject for Sir William Fox to experiment on. Persons who know the Patea bar will be able to realise the madness of this man’s experiment in trying to r'dc the snrf in a gale of wind, drunk or sober. The bar is very dangerous for small boats even on a calm da}', as was shown by the case of the man Brown, who lost his life while going to the heads in a small boat when the river was smooth,

A For, in company, wanting his servant, called out, “ Where’s that blockhead of mine?” ‘‘ On your shoulders !” replied a lady. It has been ascertained that the man who “ held on the last” was a shoemaker. The fire in the s.s. City of Sydney will be covered by £SOO, but the cargo was a good deal injured. Weavers at Ashton-undor-Lyne have struck for an advance of five per cent, in wages. ANew Overhand Poute, shorter than the Frisco line, is that by the Achison, Topeka, and Santa Fe railroad, between the Atlantic and Pacilic States, which dcvelopes wider purposes than at first supposed. It is intended to make terminus at Guagarnas, and the directors have succeeded in obtaining from the Mexican Government such advantages as will practically give them a monopoly of the Australian, Now Zealand, and South and Central American business. Those interested claim that this route will be 300 miles shorter than the present route between New York and San Francisco, and that it will bring Australia and New Zealand 1,000 miles nearer New York than they now are. The Marquis of Salisbury, Minister for Foreign Affairs, is supposed to be hankering for a step to the liighest grade in the Peerage. A London paper hints that he is about to be raised to a dukedom.

Reviving Cotton Trade. —A table has been published showing the return of prosperity to England, so far as the cotton trade is concerned. It shows that out of 260.000 looms in the cotton districts, over 235.000 now at work, whilst about 24,000 are still unemployed, though the latter are diminishing. The contrast which this statement 'affords, when placed in juxtaposition with similar returns so recent as July last, is very gratifying. At that time Preston had about 8,500 looms unemployed, Blackburn 9,000, Accrington 2,000, and Burnley 6,000. The reduetjon of unemployed looms in other localities is in about the same proportion, and need not be enumerated.

Arming against Each Other. — The budgets of European nations form an interesting topic. The increase in national expenditure during the last 20 years is stupendous. France stands first with an expenditure of £119,000,000, Russia next with £107,000,000. Fifteen years ago Europe’s total expenditui e was £398,00,000, now it is £585,000,000, of which £160,000,000 is set down for the maintenance of armies. Every nation, with the exception of England and Holland, has increased its national debt, France being the heaviest debtor. During that time our bugbear, Russia, has increased its debt from £208,000,000 to £600,000,000. Water-Drinking at Banquets.—Captain Leßoy.of the Auckland Naval Brigade retired from the presidency of the Volunteer banquet (says the N.Z. Herald ) because teetotal principles would not permit of his giving a toast. The gallant captain errs. A grand banquet was given the other day to Lord Chelmsford by the Merchant Tailors’ Company, and to their honor he drank nothing but water. The fact got publicity in a rather curious fashion. The Master of the Company, in presenting his accounts,. bad an item respecting a filter The Court was surprised, and wished an explanation. The Master explained that at their last banquet so man}’of the guests, among them Lord Chelmsford, ■ Lord Thesiger, and the Bishop of Bedford, drank water, that he felt justified in ordering the filter in question. Truly this is a sign of the times. , , ..

TOURISTS FOR PATEA. A SCHEME OF THE FUTURE. A navy and fascinating project for attracting foreign tourists aud speculative visitors to Patea, and conveying them through our district to the romantic interior country of Hot Springs and marble fretwork terraces, has been brought under the notice of the Government. Whether it will receive early official development, we cannot yet say ; but that the peculiar facilities of Patea as a centre for tourists and holiday visitors will some day bo brought into famous prominence, no person can doubt who knows the character of the almost unexplored country behind the Patea bush. A tourist agent from Loudon, representing the renowned Thomas Cook, of Ludgato-circusjhas been making certain proposals to the Government at Wellington, with the object of bringing tourist parties to be “ personally conducted ” through the picturesque wilds of New Zealand. The gossip of London society is running strongly on this wonderful far country under the Southern Cross. Adventurous travellers are eager to climb the New Zealand Alps, and to explore the Hot Springs and terraces near L ike Taupo. Mr. Thomas Cook, catching the inspiration, is organising a “circular tour” through New Zealand. What could be more likely to extend the fame of our climate, our scenery, our soil, our Arcadian blessings as a pioneer people making an island wilderness to blossom as the rose ? When the Minister for Public Works was here last week, conversation turned on this question, as to what attractions Patea could offer to tourists. Mr Olliver said he had been much impressed with the importance of inducing wealthy Englishmen to visit this favourite colony lor pleasure as well as for business, and had told the tourist agent that the Government would do whatever might bo practicable for enabling tourists to see to advantage the remarkable features of New Zealand scenery. Some of the most interesting scenery in the world is to be found in the North Island. This almost unequalled beauty is hardly known beyond mere rumour to colonists settled on cleared strips along the coast. How many dwellers in Patea are aware that there is a small river close to onr doors, rising among the hills in the far interior towards Lake Taupo, and presenting in the upper reaches a combination of tropical grandeur and soft beauty unequalled in these islands, and excelled probably by none of the most famous rivers of the world! That mysterious region beyond the Patea bush is a terra incognita to all but a few adventurous pioneers who may have penetrated to Maori pahs in the back country during the late war. One or two parties, “ on the war path,” canoed the Patea river over rapids and snags a hundred miles up, and were amazed and charmed with the river scenery revealed to them amid those wild surroundings—scenery which realises the most fascinating pictures in verse or romantic story. Tourists like easy travelling for sightseeing. They care for neither rail nor coach when pleasanter modes of conveyance can be had. Excursions up romantic rivers are the easiest and most attractive means of enjoying scenic panoramas. American river steamers, designed for this luxury, are used to a remarkable extent by settlers and tourists alike. Railways are needed for produce, but river steamers serve a purpose not less important to a new country, in opening np the interior to observation by quick and easy excursion ; attracting settlers to look at the character of the inner country, and spreading abroad the colony’s fame for picturesque beauty or profitable settlement. Not less romantic than fancy pictures is this important fact, so little known to settlers, that the Patea river in its beautiful upper reaches is capable of being navigated a hundred miles into the splendid back country. A steam launch of light draught and saloonlike equipment might be built to traverse the stream at all states of the tide. The rapids and snags are few and trifling, being chiefly blocks of shell limestone fallen from steep cliffs into the stream, forming slight rapids here and there, but no permanent impediment to navigation for tourist purposes or for riverine produce, These are facts derived from actual experience in canoeing the river. The limestone blocks could be scattered to fragments with a little dynamite, and the stream would clear its own passage through the debris. Those fragments might be fished up by tourists, and carried Home as rare geological specimens of Nature’s handiwork in New Zealand at that that early period when Crustacea were building up aquatic deposits of shell-beds, hardening and combining into strata of limestone rock, to be a puzzle and wonder to later students of Nature’s “ stone book.” Open up the Patea river to visitors who want to look at the land up-country, and to tourists who would visit us in search of novelty and romance. This done, how famous would Patea become, and how important would be the port and town which could attract such traffic ! Here is a great future for Patea. Tourists would come to our river as the readiest highway to Lake Taupo, to the Hot Springs, and to the wonderful terraces of that strange mysterious region. Whichever district shall open route to the Hot Springs will command the. tourist and. holiday traffic of the future. What Brindisi is to the Mediterranean, what Lover is to London, what Alexandria is to the Suez Canal,

the town of Carlyle would be to Lake Taupo and the wonders thereabout ■ Even more important to Patea than this* tourist traffic would be the opening up of river-flats and clearings which would put into the market half a million acres of rich land for settlement. For all that region of splendid land the port of Patea would be the natural outlet and commercial depot. Carlyle would become a great centre for merchants and warehouses. This tourist traffic up the river would have the immediate advantage of bringing into notice the prolific flats along the river, capable of producing semi-tropical fruits and the richest produce. Vines would there have a suitable soil and climate. The timber forests would become available as a new source of wealth, with cheap and easy carriage down to the port. Many kinds of semitropical fruits and produce would thrive on those congenial hot flats up the river. So little is known of the Patea river in the upper region, that hitherto belief has been general that the head-waters are on the slopes of Mount Egmoat. They arc so shown on the maps. The fact is that only u smalt tribute comes from Mount Egmont. Ascending the river about eighty miles above Carlyle, the main branch turnsotf nearly due east; and this large tributary has its rise in the high ranges between the upper Wanganui and the base of Ruapaehu. That main branch of the Patea is navigable for steam-launches a considerable distance, to a point from which an easy road would take, the tourist to the south end ot Lake Taupo-. The Patea river would thus be a convenient and romantic highway to that region which has hitherto been so difficult, tedious, and expensive to get at. Several routes claim to bo the best, hut how are they best? From Napi“r the route to Taupo lies through vast plains of pumice-stone. From Wanganui a good road runs to the deserts of Ruapnehn ; but these, at all limes dangerous to cross, must be passed before Taupo is reached. The same objections apply to various other routes, such as that via Manawhatn. Those few colonists who have traversed the Patea river to the far interior pronounce it to be decidedly the easiest, pleasantest, most direct, and probably cheapest of any route yet known to Taupo. Mr Oliivcr lias had his attention directed to these considerations by the Chairman of the Harbor Board, whose interest in the development of the Patea river has been shown by much gratuitous labour and intelligent zeal. Mr Sherwood suggested that the Government might do much towards developing the country by opening up its natural highways to the interior ; and he gave cogent reasons for enlisting Mr Olliver’s particular interest in the remarkable capabilities of the Patea river as a channel for tourist traffic to the interior. Vast areas of excellent lain! which are now unavailable to settlers would become preterentially valuable because of cheap water carriage, virgin richness of soil, and delightful climate. Mr. Sherwood cited the opinion of Sir John Coode, the eminent engineer, who considered the upper portion of the Patea river as the most picturesque he had ever seen, excepting only one Swiss river, which had a peculiar character that, made it unique. Mr. Oliivcr remarked that the subject interested him greatly, as he recognised the importance of attracting tourists and visitors of the right sort, to enjoy the natural beauties of the country, to appreciate its attractiveness, and to make known its capabilities. All well-wishers to Patea will join us in hoping that this incidental but important conversation between the Minister of Public Works and the Chairman of Patea Harbour Board may lead to the early adoption of some practical scheme for opening up the Patea river to tourist navigation, and to that more permanent traffic which would soon follow.