RANDOM NOTES.

Oamaru Mail, Volume I, Issue 300, 10 April 1877, Page 2

RANDOM NOTES.

" A chlel's amang ye takin' notes, An* faith he'il prent 'em." BUR>'3. » Br MAGGUFFIN. It is generally admitted that " dog does not prey upon dog," nor " hawk pick out hawk's e'en ;" but however true the statement may be with the canine quadruped or the feathery biped, the same immunity is certainly not extended to a portion of the lords "of creation. The sporting fraternity and the pseudo horsey men, who are to the regular " talent" what rivulets are to the rushing river—whose small but regular contributions serve to swell the receipts of the Knights of the Metallic—have been considerably exercised during the past week by the suspicious conduct of the owner of Fishhook. Having the wholesome fear of a criminal action for libel before my eyes, I must be very cautious as to what I say; but nevertheless I think I am perfectly justified in retailing a little episode which took place before the starting of a certain race, and given to me on no less an authority tiiau my friend Magginniss ; — Dramatis Pcrsonce-: The owner of the now disqualified hoivse and a brother owner in high and animated discussion ; a distinguished and astute member of tae betting ring at a slight distance away, with ' i-ars erect, intently catching each stray ■ word "f tiiu dialogue borne to him ; and j my informant, Magginniss, eagerly watching t!:u inaticeuvrcS of the trio. .Negotiations sij'ptared to be satisfactorily concluded ; the proprietors of the rival racsrs ! separated, t and the Metallician, who for I i:ic sake of identity I shall dub Spider—- ' (iiiiolciy made his way to the resort of the j ■'• I-liiv men : ' and recklessly backed ! Titani:!, to the total exclusion of the ! 'i-juuk. Wlien he had succeeded in milkj ui-j; p.etty dry his brothers of tiie profesj .si.>>- one to the tune of LIOO, another ! J. 7.>, and so on down to L20 —he turned j ■;':■< attention to the smaller fry—the gentle ' pis: lie—with whom he succeeded in rak- ■ ng in no small number of -'flimses." Hav- ; is ■/ exhausted tiie field of labor, and no ! doubt feeling a twinge of conscience at ' having, like his co-religionists of old—the sous of Isaac—sold Ids brother, he made what reparation he could without touching his own pocket, by informing them that a swindle was on, and advising that they should back Titania to the last red cent. Generally speaking, the gentlemen who "lay the odds" know more about that lucrative transaction than the dead languages ; but the looks which greeted the revelation and advice of the Spider spoke as uumistakeably as did Ctusar in the Senate House, M hi Brute. Seeing that before lie handed the bone to his friends, this industrious member of an honourable profession had taken good care to pick it particularly clean, it may be readily supposed the appreciation of the smartness of the transaction was entirely one-sided, and that there was weeping and wailing among the children of Israel. There may be " honor among thieves ;" but judging from the foregoing, the word is a stranger to the betting fraternity, friend and foe being looked upon alike as good fish for the net. Judging from the physical proportions of Mr. I. N. Watt, the lately-appointed Resident Magistrate at Dunedin, I would not be inclined to credit him with an undue amount of pugnacity, and yet i would wager that, if phrenologically examined, the bump of combativeness would have a preponderance over all others. As Sheriff Mr. I. N. Watt had not the happy knack of drawing friends around him, and there was at least one transaction in which he played a leading part, which met with general reprobation. Why he should have been selected to preside over the City Court is an enigma to most people, unless it was to exhibit the contrast between the urbanity, courtesy, and painstaking of his predecessor, with the almost savage nioroseiiess and superciliousness of its present occupant. From tha very first day on which he heard himself addressed as " Your Worship," he evidently felt that lie had a mission to fulfil—and that mission to hold at arm's length the Press, the Bar, and the Police. Perhaps the martinet-like proc edings of the Court under the regime of its present chief is the more observable on account of the latitudes allowed by Mr. Bathgate, but I question very much if the decorum of the Court as maintained since the change is a matter for satisfaction. A few days since Mr. Inspector Mallard was enticed into a rather animated discussion with Mr. Denniston, a rather impulsive member of the legal profession, and without making the slightest effort to cheque the dispute, Mr. Watt furiously declared if there were not instant silence, he would immediately commit both the disputants for contempt. Ifow, it is well known that there is no member of the Police Force who is so thorougldy respected for his gentlemanly conduct, both in Court and out qf it—in fact, it ha* been stated that he is far too gentlemanly fop Jijs position—than Inspector Mallard, and tiie condupt of she imperious, impetuous, and irate Justice was far more calculated to bring the Court into contempt than did the conduct of those he sought to reprove. But Mr. I, N. Watt is a miniature Jeffreys, Nbrbury, and Major Sirr, rolled into one, and had he lived in the eighteenth instead of the nineteenth century, would have been an invaluable aid to the two last named worthies. Taken ttr task by the Otago Daily Times for his intemperate language and unseemly conduct, Mr. I. If. Watt grandiloquently replies from his judgment seat that "order is Heaven's first w >" and that he will continue to maintain it in, spite of Press or public. The true reading

of the sentence, however, would appear to be that "order {i.e., Mr. I. K Watt's ukase) is not only Heaven's first law, but also that particular portion of earth over which Mr. I. N. Watt seeks to reign supreme." I notice that the Dunedin Times has been ridiculing the fears expressed by some journals at the spread of that dire scourge, small-pox, and writes in the " who's afraid" kind of style. Like Sir John Falstaff, it is very easy to be brave when our courage is not likely to be put to a test, and words cost nothing ; but were the case otherwise, and an opportunity given for the display of that courage of which he is so blatant, it is just possible that, like the worthy knight, the writer would assume a recumbent position until the danger had passed. The article in question asserts that at the present time there are 700 patients in the Smallpox Hospital in London, and inferentially asserts that because such is the fact, if we made no effort to acclimatise the disease in our midst, or did not welcome it with outstretched arms, we should at least remain passive in the matter. As well might it be asserted that because London with its four millions of inhabitants is blessed with some fifty thousand paupers, we should rec ;ive with open arms a proportion of the blessing. The Times is a journal holding too high a position to attribute anything which appears in its leading columns to the result of ignorance, but were it not so I would give it the benefit of the following little anecdote which would aptly describe its position with recrard to the journals which it so sneeringly pooh-poohs :—A young officer who had never fleshed his mailen sword or smelt powder was marching beside his regiment on the field of battle, a few moments before the attack was to commence. Bt;side him was his colonel, a gre3'-headed old veteran, the hero of a hundred fights ; but while Johnny Raw was wound vip into an almost hysterical state, laughing half wildly, and seemingly thoroughly enjoying the situation, the old colonel's teeth were firmly sat, and his eye was on the enemy before him. Said the youth with a jaunty laugh, "Why, colonel, I do firmly believe you're afraid !" " Yes, sir," said the veteran in a freezing tone and a look of scorn, " Yes, sir, lam afra"d, and if you were half as much afraid you would have run away long ago." The old man knew what was before him, and boldly faced it like a hero. I make the Times a present of the simile.