DECEASED WIFE’S SISTER’S MARRIAGE BILL.

New Zealand Times, Volume XXXII, Issue 5145, 19 September 1877, Page 2

DECEASED WIFE’S SISTER’S MARRIAGE BILL.

TO THE EDITOR OP THE NEW ZEALAND TIMES. Sir, — The moment for airing opinions of the Deceased Wife's Sister's Marriage Bill is again before a New Zealand Parliament, and, as such, before the public. Arguments lor and against are becoming mere platitudes ; but if there is one sign more than another tending to prove the effete and moribund status of its opponents it is their resorting to not the most euphemistical expressions in reference to those who have the courage to act in defiance of present disabilities. Such allusions attach a worse odour to those who use them than to the victims they are aimed at, nor do they arise from more moral surroundings. Are not those objectionable reflections, so wantonly bandied, equally applicable to all or any efforts to enter the “holy” state of matrimony?” Nay, if there be less of that objectionable nature so profusely attributed to brothers-in-law, it is surely in those cases that spring from a kindly and less passionate seeking which a care for a family of children gives rise to. It scarcely requires to be said, as has been said times without number, who so eligible as so near a relation to care for motherless children. Tn most cases such duty falls to the lot of maiden aunts—those whose prospects are not always of the brightest in respect to that great purpose for which woman was created ; then why begrudge the moat fitting person so honorable and unselfish a privilege as to become the orphans’ guardian by a closer tie. It may be granted that as the law stands it obviates that dilemma which otherwise involves the sister-in-law in her brother-in-law’s home. This is the only argument or objection that is worthy of a second thought, and yet it is not an insuperable one. I am not informed of the experience that may have arisen in those countries where the law favors such unions ; but allowing in this present instance that the alteration be held up as a bugbear, a dragon in the path of female duty, with its two-edged sword, and which to attack openly would seem somewhat quixotical, yet to undermine and countermine may be attended with some effect; and in attempting such, Iwouldbegtoassure my fair readers thatl shall contend in support of that general and prevailing high character of the women of our nation which is our pride and boast ; and if I am allowed the following strain of irony, it will be used only in allusion to certain anomalies in dress, customs, and practices, with a view to compare and disarm the one in question as being of equally inconsequential force. I would ask, is the present evening dress a, dress or undress ? Dare anyone venture upon the prudery of condemning round dances? An exacting chaperon is a terrible bore ! Botanising pairs branching off from picnic parties, excused by the rare specimens obtained ; strolling pigeon pairs, accidentally missing their way, eagerly seeking to regain the main party, but the inevitable round and round is tantalising and perplexing. All this and more, without infringing upon a priceless virtue. And yet those fair maidens are not to be allowed to grace a brother-in-law’s motherless home it this alteration in the law takes place. The woman who will dare to break through that cordon of morbid sense of propriety may rest upon the assurance her rightmindedness will yield her, and may set scandalmongers at defiance, for she will surely gain the approval of all whose goodwill is worth caring for. Pretty sisters are often selected as the victims in these objections, but how few of those who will not obtain homes of their own. Unselfish duties, as said before, generally fall to the lot of maiden aunts, when, if there arises no compatibility between the parties that may lead to marriage, let her not be. scathed by the gratuitous venom of unmerited scandal; let her amiable efforts accommodate themselves happily in their worthy cause. The liberal and advancing thought that is carrying this alteration in the law will go far in clearing away those stumbling-blocks of false modesty and over-strained proprieties. Prudery is the fruit of imaginary ideas rather than of realised practices, and it carried to its logical outcome would clothe our females in Eastern costume, and put a Turk’s jealous care over them. How much in these varied phases depends upon peculiar points of view, such are often fluctuating pivots around which many incongruities float in uncertain and rudderless guidance; but the prevailing air of virtue secures for the mass happy homes in the hearts of the confiding ones. It is a saving maxim, “ To the pure all things are pure,” I would venture to urge upon all who reflect upon this matter to draw a balance for themselves between prejudiced prudery and a generous and open-hearted trust in the social virtue of our families. —I am, &c., William Beetham. P.S. —Since writing the above the Bishop of Wellington’s letter has appeared on this question. The Bishop asks why the Legislature should deal with this subject, so offensive to those who have carefully considered it ? How many have “ carefully considered it,” and find it equally offensive on the other side ? And well they may, when they see such unseemly and offensive epithets so unsparingly applied to those who in all the relations of life life are as virtuous, as moral, aye, even as religious, as the best of us. What unnecessary anguish is inflicted upon worthy families ! The next dread is that all the affinities will be as eligible as the one in question and why not? Contrast such with consanguinity—which is the worst ? Bucolic or

farm-yard economy might well give a reply that the great bugbear to the Bishop is the immorality involved ; and be sums tip its amount by a comparison with double the amount of public-houses. Such is an uncertain note, for between local optionists and fiee licensers there would be a different estimate of evil; but it is enough to say the awful medium would be sufficiently bad if tbe result could be demonstrated. What pandemoniums those countries must be where this free law prevails. Can anyone report as to their moral state ? One would expect a great exodus of the good to this more favored country, and I am not sure but that such an immigration if it could be had, would not be the most powerful and sensible argument hitherto used against any alteration of our law. There is much more in the Bishop's letter open to criticism; but enough for the present.—l am, &c., W.B. Taifca, September 16.