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Nelson Evening Mail, Volume XIIL, Issue 275, 27 November 1878, Page 2

* mmm mm mm ™**"" I I ' * At Mr Hutchison's meeting last evening some unfortunate Milesian with whisky in bis head and stick in his hand, jumped on to the table with a view of addressing the audience. When the meeting was over he essajed the same thing over again, but a chair thrown at him by one man, and a grease pot, with which the chairman's table was lighted, by another, had the effect of quenching his desire to be heard and the light at the same time. He will possibly hesitate before he attempts to gain the hearing of his fellow citizens again. — New Zealander. A visitor from Masterton at the late Show was looking up a friend at the Marquis of Normanby Hotel, prior to returning home, and at last found him, as he thought, recumbent on a sofa, with his hat pulled forward oxer his face. " Come, old fellow, we must be off — the horses are hitched up," he cried. The " old fellow" raised his hat, and the visitor from Masterton gazed on the noble features of His Excellency the Governor. The next conscious moment of the Masterton visitor found him rapidly driving, without a friend in the direction of the borough. A woman in Auckland recently put herself in the hands of a dentist to have her teeth reorganised. He found them in a very bad plight, and asked her why she had allowed them to become so decayed without coming to him or some other dentist. She replied that she had not time. "But," he insisted, it would not have taken long, and you could come in almost any time." She saw that be was bent on an explanation, and she fired this at him like a cannon ball:— " Well, I guess if you had a baby every year for the last ten years, your Jwould think it was about enough to 'tend to." He acknowledged that it would. The Captive balloon at Paris is s splendid speculation. It makes £50 each ascent, and there are four ascents an hour—vis , £200 | per hour— viz, about 42000 per day.

. ____> . The completion of the railway between Christchurch and Duhedin, thus bringing into closer communication the two principal towns in what is rather absurdly called the Middle Island of New Zealand, says the Pall | Malt Budget, is reported by telegraph from i Christchurch, and a grand banquet has-been held to celebrate the occasion. There can be no doubt that, so far, the Public Works Policy in New Zealand has been far more successful than even those who were favorable to i* had hoped; and Sir Julius Vogel is certainly entitled to the congratulations which were forwarded to him. The Middle Island is perhaps for climate and soil better suited to the men of English race than any portion of the British possessions in the South Pacific, and the whole colony bids fair shortly to rival, if not to surpass, in prosperity the most powerful of the Australian Colonies. That the borrowing has been very heavy to carry out the immigration and public works schemes which the Agent General inaugurated we have frequently noticed; but hitherto, it must be admitted, the increased price obtained for the waste lands, and the impulse given to agriculture in every province, has more than counterbalanced the outlay. That with a fall in wool, a bad season, and a cessation of" loans from England, a reaction might set in is, however, evident; aud it would be.preferable to see the Budget in an English colony depend less for its stability upon .an item so easily diminished in a period of depression as the proceeds of the sale of waste lands. A time of increasing trade, completion of trunk lines, and general prosperity is the best to establish a sound financial system. " Atticus," of the Melbourne Leader, says: —Several banks in England are- coming to grief just now from speculative transactions quite outside their proper sphere of business. " Investment in land in New Zealand and Australia" is the cause assigned in some cases. The following story, the particulars of which have come to my knowledge, may throw some light on the manner in which " land investments" were managed. A near relation of a managing director of a home bank heard of a property in one of the colonies that had come into the hands of the bank. He at once went home and purchased the station from the bank on bills, with the following conditions attached : — " The purchaser to pay the bank cash at the rate of £1 per head for all stock on the station at the time of delivery over the number included in the original purchase, and the bank to pay the purchaser cash at the same rate for all stock short of the number included in the purchase." The purchaser returns to Australia, takes immediate delivery from the bank's representatives, and finds on mustering that there are 20,000 head of stock deficient. The bank, therefore, paid this lucky purchaser £20,000 cash, according to agreement, and the actual value of the station and stock to day is about one-half of the amount he received. With such "investments" as these, is it any wonder that speculating banks go smash ? A most amusing incident occurred lately on board a large steamship whilst on a voyage from England. A lady, a former resident of Hokitika, and who considered herself the leader of the ton there, in its palmy days, was returning to New Zealand after a brief sojourn on the Continent, and on the voyage was very fond of displaying her knowledge of the French language, in a manner, which she, no doubt, thought was quite ala Parisienne. She, one day, interrogated the saloon steward in her most approved style of Erench, but he appeared dreadfully confused, whereupon Madame politely said, " Oh I pardon me; possibly you do not understand French?" Now, be it known, that steward had travelled a bit in his time, and had " rubbed noses with many a Johnny Crapaud," and after an amused scrutiny of the lady, most politely replied, " No, Madam, not Irish French." We need scarcely add, that there was very little French spoken in that saloon for the rest of the voyage, and that the steward was voted by the lady, a rude, nasty fellow, and no scholar. A very rich patch, or probably a " plant," of gold, was found in the middle of Donovanstreet, Sandhurst, near the old police station, by a lad engaged as a drover by a local butcher. The boy was driving his sheep along the road, the , surface of which had been washed away by the recent rains, when his attention was attracted to a gjittering substance lying in a small cavity, and stooping down he found. that the hole was full of small nuggets. He filled both his hands, but his sheep having meanwhile strayed some distance away, he left the spot, having first invited another lad named Costello, who was in the street, to share in the benefit of the fund. This boy and another named Callan, who came up soon afterwards, obtained several ounces each out of the hole. Altogether it is said that over 3ib weight of gold was taken out of the hole. Thia is the way the money goes. Breakfast on the occasion of the Prince of Wales's visit to unveil the statue of the Prince Consort, £2000 ; thanksgiving for the recovery of the Prince of Wales, £13,000 ; reception to the Emperor of Bussia, £13,000; the Shah of Persia's reception, £15,000 ; the Sultan's ditto, £30,000; flowers at the reception of the Prince of Wales on his return from India, £2000; banquet in honour of the Czar, £2676 ; and foe the same occasion £700 for upholstery, £93 for menu cards, £170 for bands, £25 for wands, £22 for gloves, £282 for Jgratuities — " tips " — and £7 for cork-screws ; flowers for Shah's reception, £527 ; and gloves at Czar's reception, £57. Then there are the bills in connection with the freedom of the City aud the banquet to Lords Beaconsfield and Salisbury. The Manchester Courier understands that Lord Duffierin has accepted the office oE British Commissioner for Asia Minor. Mine Tbiers engaged 2500 musicians to render more impressive the ceremonies in honour of her husband on Sept. 3, at the Church of Notre Dame, Paris. An accompaniment of harps glorified the " Gloria." Among the " floral tributes " was a basket containing 3000 choice roses, the gift of Brie Conite Robert. Faith, hope, and charity are the ornameuts of every well-regulated person, and the honest family physician is the best friend of mankind. In the hour of sickness, and tormenting pains, what so grateful to the poor suffering patient as a remedy at .hand that can subdue bis distress and restore tranquility. " Ghoixah's Great Indian Cores" have the most beneficial effect in reaching and correcting all the ordinary disorders of the human body. They are decisive in their action and invigorating to the constitution. They can be had of all Chemists, where see the numerous reliable testimonials received by the proprietor.