Comments: Common and Caustic.

Maoriland Worker, Volume 2, Issue 11, 19 May 1911, Page 7

Comments: Common and Caustic.

r An up-to-date workmate . calls his log "Aviator." It is a Skye terrior.

'The Mercantile Gazette," the organ of New Zealand merchant and financial houses, says : "There is quite m> difference between earning money, making money, and getting money. The first is called Honesty, the second Speculation, and the third Robbery." Borne folk are "unco judeecious" m their definitions, but if Speculation isn't "earning money," and only "earning money" is Honesty, then perhaps the "Gazette" will ohlige further by next weeic stating the moral difference between {speculation and llobbcrv. * -~ -x- -xOno would think the difference between tiio first two, at ioa&t, could be stated in fewer words. Thus: Honesty is Jllarning wnat you never Take. Speculation is Taking what you never Make. -* * -XNow you may understand more elearJv the meaning of the copybook headline "Honesty is tiie best policy." That is the Honesty (ea.rn.ing.) of the iWork ing-class is tne beat policy—for the capitalist class. The same paper also states that "The way to get rich is simply to reeist being a tool." "The Mercantile Gazette" evidently knows that the capitalist class owns not "*only the tools'' but the "fools" of production. ,When are the Workers going to give over being fools, and own the tools themselves ? * * * The other day, a Minister of the Grown, who carries on business of haberdashery on a big scale in "Wellington and Auckland had a large advertising space in the "New Zealand Times" blank, but for his name and the nature of his calling printed across it in small letters. One wondered what it meant, till turning to the business precepts column of "The 'Mercantile- Gazette" the following struck the eye: "Put your brains into your advertising." Probably that's what the Hon. George had done, -x *■ ■» Britain's the richest country in the world. Despite Old Age Pensions there were over 500,000 persons in receipt of poor relief last year in the United Kingdom. This represents - 223 paupers in every 10,000 of the population. Our Glorious Empire I ■«• * •» '•'The Deutsche Tageszeitung" says that the Socialist press of Germany can count t>o-day on a million and a quarter subscribers distributed among seventy-eight newspapers. In 1904 the number of readers was estimated at 600,000. It grows, it grows! Are we the same, The feeble band, the few ? •H- * * When you Workers become more agitated "about owning your jol-s you will be less agitated about tosrr;i them. ■* •* * A Tory weekly review recently referred to the striking colliers of South tWales in the following terms: Such creatures as the Welsh ■ miners men who are striking apparently with no ostensible object save the creation of Anarchy. . men of this kind—if they are worthy of the name. At eight o'clock on the morning of the publication of the above %vords over 300 Lancashire miners wer • suddenly killed. At once the Tory prep discovered that miners are "heroes." * * *. It is ever thus. The gentlemen who ©et their living by writing against Democracy (says Chiozza Money) have an unbounded admiration for the workingman "when the drums begin to roll. 5 ' In the pursuit of their trade , as newspaper men, it is their pitiful duty to regard the pawns of industry as economic instruments for the creation of profits. * * * Don't be backward in letting all your workmates know how much you enjoy reading "The Maobii/AJsto Worker." Somo day they will be very grateful to you for bringing it under their notice. Thanks. * * * During an argument between two wTiarfi.es over the now defunct "loyalty pledge ,, of Wellington Trades and Lal>our Council, the exuberant objector to ifche pledge declared that "Carey and company wants to bottle up the Socialists in a nutshell." * * * "Do you play Bach ?" queried a fair devotee of Wellington musical union of a male friend she met on a NewWwn* Ixwind' car iaab Saturday afternoon

"No, I play half-back," was the reply of the mere man, who loved football and knew little about music. * * * "The cost of loving in Scotland is liiigher than in England" declares the Glasgow "Forward." One thought "loving' , a misprint for "living" till the caught the following in another column. "An Englishman transferred to Scotland and paid the English rate of wages would suffer a distinct hardship on account of the dearer cost of 'loving'!" After all perhaps the comp. is right in that on© cannot "love" vn r less he first "live." * * ' * A philosopher says: "The happiest poopl-e are thoso who are most skilful in humbugging themselves." The cause of Mr. Prior's unhappy state of mind is that he tries to humbug the Workers instead of confining his attention to himself. * ■*■ * Speaking of humbugs. Mr. Mas&ey, leader of the Opposition, was lecturing in a Southern-town recently and the point of his address was to emphasise the humbugging policy of the Government. After ghing what he considered some glaring examples, he proceeded something like this—"The Premier's a humbug, Mr. Millar's a humbug, the two McKenzie's are humbugs when a deep bass voice set the audience in a roar by interjecting "lou are all hum-buggers"—with a consiuerablo pause between the first and two last syllables. -s * * Is your news agent exhibiting a ' : Worker" contents poster? If not, r>lease ask him why ? ■"■•*■** A Glasgow doctor who was returning from America met among his fellowpassengers an American lady who bored everybody by the frequency of her declaration that her ancestors had "come over in the Mayflower" and consequently she had some of the bluest blood in America in her veins. "Madam" said the doctor at the dinner table one day, when the lady had repeated this story for the hundredth time, "Madam, dae ye no' ken that blue bluid's jist a sign o' bad circulation !" The silence that followed could be felt. * * * A shortage of shillings is reported from th-3 Vv 7 est of Kngla'nd, says an exchange. Among quite a number of ones acquaintances the shortage of coins of all kinds is so chronic as to be taken quite as a matter of course. * * * When the hours and the general conditions of labour are such as to cause great wear-aiid-tear of body or mind, or both, and to lead to a low standard of living; when there has been a want of that leisure, rest and repose which are among the necessaries for efficiency, then the labour has been extravagant from the point of view of society at large.—Prof. Marshall.