MISCELLANEOUS.

Mount Ida Chronicle, Volume IV, Issue 221, 23 May 1873, Page 5

MISCELLANEOUS.

A little boy at the Portsmouth Navy Tard, son of a naval officer now at sea,, recently concluded his usual evening prayer with " O Lord! Please send my clear papa horne again, as quick as UucleSam will let you." * This is said to be the best pun evermade in America. Hoi-ace Greeley, during the Scott'campaign, declared that he execrated and spit upon the Whig platrform. A Western New York editor remarked that if G-reeley spit upon the platform he couldn't expect-to-rate as a Whig. . . ' - We have been informed says the ' Tuapeka .Times' that in consequence of the unsatisfactory " working of the presentarrangements for the execution of mining survey's, the Provincial Government intend to revert'to the old system, viz.," "of. paid surveyors, who will be debarred, from privately practising their profession. We are also given to understand that the survey fees are to be greatly reduced. A shepherd named Hugh M'Gregor, arrested at Branch Creek, Cardrona, as a dangerous lunatic, was conveyed to Cromwell by Constable "Comyn on Thursday last. He was brought before Mr. Fraer, J .P., at the Court house on Priday morn-r ing, and remanded to Clyde for "further examination. We- understand that this is the second occasion on which the unfortunate man has had to-be placed under restraint for the same cause. —' Cromwell Argus.'

The ' Westport Times' says that " the ' credit system on the G-oldiields, instead \ of being controlled by prudential restriction, has led to .the virtual extinguishment of much capital in unprofitable enterprise, and the misdirected application of labor in perpetuating for a time an artificial prosperity and semblance of commercial activity having a most unstable foundation. It has tended also in a slight degree to perpetuate improvident habits, and keep up an artificial scale of wages and prices detrimental to the general welfare. The Masonic. Eobbeey at Timaeu.—j.". The interview between Judge Ward and Mr Bickle, has resulted disastrously for Mr Bickle. But looking at the extreme nature of the offence, its petty, combined with its grave blackguardism, the three years penal servitude awarded errs more on the side of leniency than of sternness. However it is a warning to future Bickles, and therefore we give prominence to .the just sentence. Since incarceration, this minute robber has feigned madness, tearing his,clothes and smashing everything that came handy. The doctors, though,, who were called in put a stop to this little game by declaring his madness . to,, be moonshine, and that the man is perfectly sane. —* Timaru Herald/ * • A young nian in a recitation in geography informed the astonished teacher that "the Mammoth Caravan in Kentucky is the greatest living curiosity, and has been exploded ten miles from its mouth." A gentleman breakfasting with another found his host eating some hard dry junk, . which was offered to the guest. " Why do you eat such stuff?" asked the latter in astonishment. " Because," replied the former, "by .twelve o'clock I get a thirst for.which I would not take ten.dollars." JSTot Likely—Creditor: How often must I climb'three pair of stairs before I get the amount of this little account? Debtor:.Do you think lam going to rent a place on. the first floor to accommodate my creditors.. - John Burns, San Francisco, has been declared insane for threatening to shoot - his wife and set fire to his house. A local paper says.that as the former is rery homely and the latter fully insured, the - evidence is weak. "" A lady teacher in one of the public schools of a town in Wisconsin has laid aside her ferule and adopted the method of kissing her pupils into obedience. The larger boys, it is said, are particularly unruly, and require daily correction. At the examination of a- parochial school, a.reverend gentleman was asking a class the meaning of words. answered; very well till ho gave them ""backbiter."' This seemed to be a puzzler. It went" down the class, till it came to a pimple little urchin, who locked sheepishly knowing, and said " It may be a flea."