CURIOUS EPITAPHS.

Mount Ida Chronicle, Volume III, Issue 164, 26 April 1872, Page 6

CURIOUS EPITAPHS.

A few. days ago I was in Wiltshire, and, entering the old churchyard of Sarum, copied the following:— To Peter Isnell, 30 years Clerk of this Parish, who died on his way to Church to assist at a Wedding, 31st March, 1811. The life of this Clerk was just threescore and ten, - Nearly half of which time he had sung out .. Amen; In his youth he was married, like other young men, But his wife died one day, so he chanted Amen ; A second he took; she departed; what then? He married and buried a third with Amen. Thus his joys and his sorrows were trebled, but then His voice was deep bass as he sung out Amen. On the horn he could blow as well as most men, So his horn was exalted in blowing Amen; But he lost all his wind after threescore and ten, And here with three wives he waits till again. . . •.,....■ The trumpet shall rouse him to sing out Amen.

Upon a flat stone in one of the oldest churchyards in Oxford, the following is to be seen over the grave of a letterfounder:—

Under this stone lies honest Syl, Who died, tho' sore against his will; Yet, in his fame he shall survive— Learning shall keep his name alive— For he the parent was of letters : He founded to confound his betters; 1 hough what those letters should contain Did never once disturb his brain. Since, therefore, reader, he is gone, Pray let him not be trod upon. Died 1705.

In St. Chad's Churchyard, Eochdale, is to be found a collection perhaps the most varied in England. I copied the following from a great list, many, of them bordering on the blasphemous : —-

I.—Over the grave of a former clergyman, Full three feet deep beneath this stone Lies our late Yicar, Foster; He.clip'd his sheep to the very bone But said no Paternoster.

, Died 1616. • 2.—Oyer the grave of a schoolmaster and • .. his wife. . . Here lies John, and with him Mary, Cheek by jowl they never vary ; No wonder that they so agree, John wants no punch and Moll no tea. 3. —Upon the Sexton.

Here lies Joe Green, . Who arch has been, And "drove a gainful trade With powerful death, till out of breath, He threw away his spade. When Death beheld his comrade yield • He, like a cunning knave, : Came soft as wind poor Joe behind, And push'd him int' his grave. Eeader—one tear, if thou hast one in

store, - ; . Since Joe Green's tongue and chin can wag no' more.

InNewhaven Churchyard, Sussex, is alarge stone, bearing to be. erected to the memory of Mr. Thomas Tipper, landlord of the "Brown Bear," who departed this life on ,the 14th May, 1785, aged 54 years:—

Eeader, with kind regard this grave survey, Nor heedless pass where Tipper's ashes lay";. Honest he was, ingenious, blunt, and kind, And dar'd do what few* dare do—speak his mind. * Philosophy and history well he knew, Was vers'd in physic and in surgery too; The best old stingo he both brew'd and sold, Nor did one knavish act to get his gold ; He play'd through live a varied comic part, And knew immortal Hudibras by heart. Reader, with real truth such was the

man— Be better, Wiser, laugh more if you can. In Ashbourne Churchyard is a huge stone over the grave .of a man named Stone; with the following couplet upon it:—

Jerusalem's curse is not .fulfilled in me, For here a stone-upon a Stone* you. see.' The following was found in 'Mildred Churchyard, over the grave of a blacksmith i A noted blacksmith died of late,' And_. when arrived at Heaven's gate, There he stood and would not knock, because he meant to pick the lock.

In the same churchyard, and not far from the grav,e of the blacksmith, is a tombstone to a man named Penny, with the following couplet:— Reader, if cash you're in wany of any, Dig six feet down and you'll find a Penny.

Here is one upon a Welsh doctor, buried in the principal churchyard at Car-

narvon : Many I've raised up from the grave And pickled for dissection; Sav'd in my turn', I hope to have A glorious resurrection.